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Now that you've moved, does your new home still feel temporary? Like you are just there for a short time and will be going HOME to the house you just moved from because that is still HOME?
I get it. It takes a while to get that mental shift.
Frankly where we live now, even after 5 years, still seems a bit temporary. While I like our house, the area we live in seems lacking in several ways. I already know we will move from here someday. I find myself thinking of things I could do to the house - like upgrade the flooring upstairs - and I'm mentally weighing if I want to put that kind of effort and expense into a place I'm not interested in staying long term.
We've been in our current house 25 years. Our kids grew up here. Before that we had lived in several states while in the service. Yet our current place isn't "home" to me. "Home" to me will always be one of two other places we lived. Not specifically the house, but the location. Both the others had the right combination of culture, nature, land, terrain, environment that said "home" to me. Living in those places was just different. Even just going back for a visit, it feels like I never left. Even though my body lives here, my soul will always live there.
Now that you've moved, does your new home still feel temporary? Like you are just there for a short time and will be going HOME to the house you just moved from because that is still HOME?
Does that even make sense?
HOME IS WHERE THE CATS ARE!
Once they move in, that's the home and the place before is empty.....even if you are still moving cargo.
After about 14 months, I still feel like I live in my current city, but where I moved from is still home. It’s less about the house and more about the social connections in my past city. Maybe it’ll change, maybe it won’t.
After about 14 months, I still feel like I live in my current city, but where I moved from is still home. It’s less about the house and more about the social connections in my past city. Maybe it’ll change, maybe it won’t.
That plus the reasons behind moving to that place. I've moved a lot during my life mostly dictated by my career. Most of the places I've lived were stepping stones along the path to an ultimate destination. All those stepping stones felt temporary despite the length of time I spent standing on them. I didn't feel the urge to anchor myself all that much because the goal was still floating ahead on the horizon in my mind's eye. Some places I liked better than others, but they still felt temporary. I now live in a place that is as close to the imagined destination as I'm likely to get. The house itself (I've lived here 3 years) still needs work to make it feel as if it truly does belong to me, so it still feels a bit temporary. Just not in the same way. I don't adore the house itself. It's boring but efficient. Much of that is fixable. While it isn't my heart house, I do like its setting and the surrounding area. For the first time in my adult life I have no plans or desire to leave.
Last edited by Parnassia; 08-11-2023 at 01:50 PM..
I have to give it about a year for it to feel like home and feel like it's my house that I own. Before that, it will feel rather foreign like I'm visiting. Perhaps it's because after a year, I've lived there through 4 seasons, I don't know.
Now that you've moved, does your new home still feel temporary? Like you are just there for a short time and will be going HOME to the house you just moved from because that is still HOME?
Does that even make sense?
Our new home in a different city from where we were while I was working, felt like home from day 1 of the visit to see it.
I have to give it about a year for it to feel like home and feel like it's my house that I own. Before that, it will feel rather foreign like I'm visiting. Perhaps it's because after a year, I've lived there through 4 seasons, I don't know.
It's the same for me. I need to go through the seasons and holidays. By that time I'll have figured out where to shop for everything, have a primary care provider (family doc), someone who will give me a decent haircut, and some good restaurants. I've stopped rearranging things in the kitchen and closets. I really feel comfortable when I know the place well enough to not consult a map when a road is closed during an emergency.
I think I've moved too many times; no place feels like home.
16 years in my parents' house, then a bunch of rentals over ten years.
We bought a house, stayed 18 years, then rented around for three years, bought another house and lived there for 10 years, went on the road for a year, then bought our current home 5 years ago. Yes, it's home, but I'm not particularly attached to it.
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