Young-ish parents looking to leave NJ (crime rate, house, school districts)

[nododgy]

Hi all!

My wife and I are in our mid-late twenties and have a son who will soon be 4. We've had some setbacks but we're looking to have our next child within the next year. Where we live, there simply isn't enough room, so we've been shopping around for a house here for some time. We've come to the conclusion that where we live just isn't right for us. We live in South Jersey, in one of the top 50 most dangerous cities in the U.S. Gangs and drugs are pretty prevalent, and the overall attitude from most who live here is just depressing. Despite all the negatives, every where in the area is expensive (property taxes in NJ are ridiculous). It's also very hard to find an area with decent schools.
I've been trying to convince my wife for some time to look outside of NJ, and she's finally agreed once I've shown here what we could get if we did. I've been having a hard time deciding where would be the best area to look in. Here are some of the "needs/wants" we would have:

-Affordable housing/cost of living
-Good, safe schools
-Within 45 minutes to an hour of the beach
-Family-friendly area
-Not looking to live in the city (For ex: We could never live in Philadelphia or something similar), but not looking to live in the middle of nowhere either. Something suburb-ish

We've mostly been looking in the NC and SC area, but may consider VA as well if it fit our criteria. We had been looking in the Myrtle Beach area, but then we found out about the crime rate issue. Another factor to consider: my parents may be moving down with us. They would possibly be living with us to share the cost of housing and also be there to help with childcare. As far as things that would benefit them, they would enjoy it if there was an "antique scene" I suppose you could say. They've been collecting and selling antiques for years now, and have even had their own store at one point.
I work strictly online at the moment, so finding work at first would not be an issue for myself. It would be nice if the area had some potential for local IT jobs, but I may continue to work strictly from home.

Basically, we are looking for suggestions as to what area would be a good fit for us and our situation. Looking in the NC, SC, VA area. I apologize, this post was a bit rushed so that I could get it posted before I start work. I would be more than willing to answer any questions that would help.

Thank you all in advance!

[ckhthankgod]

If weather isn't a factor and you don't mind lake beaches, then parts of Upstate NY could work. A place/area that comes to mind is Baldwinsville. Perhaps other parts of Eastern PA too.

As for the states you listed, I'd say to look into Mount Pleasant SC as a potential possibility.

[nododgy]

Weather would be a factor for us. If we're moving out of state, we would definitely be looking to go somewhere warmer.

[willow wind]

Look into the Fernadina Beach/ Yulee, Florida area. Basically has what you are looking for.

[kyle19125]

I'd recommend the Cary-Apex-Morrisville area near Raleigh. You'll find a good selection of very nice 4 bedroom/3 bath homes in the 2500-2700 sq ft range priced within the 280K-325K bracket and within very safe, top-flight school districts. It's also in close proximity to Research Triangle Park in Durham which has one of the highest concentration of IT jobs in the country, as well as three major universities (Duke University, University of North Carolina and North Carolina State University) which are huge employers as well as major medical facilities such as Duke University Medical Center/Research Centers and UNC Hospitals/Research Centers that employ hundreds in non-medical IT jobs. The only sacrifice is the beach aspect which is about two hours away and not heavily trafficked. If finding a well-paying job, good schools, a nice house for the money and a safe, family-friendly environment are higher priorities, I think you would be hard pressed to do better.