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Comparing Americans to some Asian countries, this statement holds true.
When I went to China, people actually bumped me left and right on street.
Well providing it is Beijing, I guess people are very fast-paced.
NONE of them said sorry.
Same in Indonesia (my roots) and Malaysia.
Japanese on the other hand is just like Americans. They say sorry all the time. Not only that, sometimes they will bow down when doing so. Made me feel very uncomfortable.
Well then, in that case I guess politeness is cultural.
Is politeness really a crime these days? It seems like sometimes people respect you more for being an ***hole rather than being extra polite or kind to someone.
*sigh* That's not what I mean. Of course politeness is valued and important. I just think it's too common a thing for your average American to apologize for simply not being able to please everyone. You can be hospitable and compassionate(polite,right?) without feeling the need to be a saint and/or doormat. Sometimes it's better to just give a shrug. For example, if someone's eating in YOUR restaurant and complains that the stickybuns are too sweet are you going to say "Sorry it didn't suit your palette!" or would you say:"Oh, well most of our customers love them." You get what I'm saying now? It's not our responsibility to please every single person we come by, but that seems to be the norm in most places here.
Has anyone else noticed that we as Americans are known for apologizing for nearly everything? I get that it's polite to say "pardon me" or "sorry" when you really need to, but I think we do it a little too much. I just think apologies should be used only when you truly and sincerely mean it.
There is a difference between a run of the mill "sorry" for bumping someone and a sincere apology. They both serve different purposes. Saying "sorry" casually isn't bad or good, it's just part of the culture and language, like anything else. Saying sorry casually doesn't devalue other apologies in more serious situations, because we have the mental capacity as humans to discern the difference between the two types of apologies. That is how languages work. Humans are actually quite good at communicating.
I don't get all the stereotypes that Americans are rude, as having traveled around the world Americans are among the friendliest and most polite and respectful of people (generally).
Compared to other countries we certainly say "Sorry" a lot as well as "Pardon me" or "Excuse me" when passing each other in the grocery aisles, etc etc. Plus we generally have the best customer service levels in the world.
Has anyone else noticed that we as Americans are known for apologizing for nearly everything? I get that it's polite to say "pardon me" or "sorry" when you really need to, but I think we do it a little too much. I just think apologies should be used only when you truly and sincerely mean it.
also Americans say thank you for almost everything.
I guess we've been raised well, if we say "Pardon me," when running into someone, "Excuse me," when walking in front of someone, and "Thank you," when appropriate. It's extremely rude to run into someone and not say "Excuse me." I don't feel that's apologizing or groveling...good manners show a little class.
"I'm so sorry, but I like your red t-shirt better." (It's an opinion, why are you sorry?)
I agree. I grew up with it and I hear it all the time, but since my family moved to Germany and Korea and I've started traveling over there more I realize how different it is here.
It was explained to me by a linguistics professor as a solution to the cultural melting pot we used to be in places like Manhattan. It became common place for Americans of all backgrounds to apologize and smile a lot to make sure you're not taken in the wrong way when meeting on the streets and speaking different languages and dialects. Through time, English became the dominant language and this figure of speech and super smiley attitude have become less meaningful, but still habitually attached to our culture.
Obviously it's not that simple, but that's the "if you ask a linguist" answer.
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