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Old 03-06-2009, 12:52 PM
Caa Caa started this thread
 
940 posts, read 2,479,449 times
Reputation: 260

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OK Y'all. I live in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. I love this town for it's culture and tons and tons of things to do here especially for families. There is something that is bothering me now though. Could someone tell me why this town(or you own hometown if this applies) has become so full of ignorant jerks and selfish people? We moved here in Janaury 2005. People here were so much nicer than the people in South Florida where we had lived previously. They let you out in traffic, smiled in the restaurants and shops and did not speed up to not let you in in traffic. Now, it seems that people here have turned into the biggest jerks! The other day, I was letting someone out in traffic and the person behind me had the nerve to honk at me(I was just being nice to the poor guy on the side street) then my husband put on his turn signal(usually the person would slow down and let you in front of him) and the guys actually sped up and honked at us. I know that thigns are different now and all that, but can anyone give opinions on how to make kindness prevalent once again, why are people the way they are and why has their kindness changed just over the course of 4 years? I know cell phones and business are part of the problem, but seriously, it takes 5 seconds to be nice!! I guess I must live in an idalistic world, but if I am not nice, I would have let the unkindness win and be just like them! What do you think?
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Old 03-06-2009, 01:41 PM
 
Location: Portland, Oregon
7,084 posts, read 12,014,797 times
Reputation: 4125
Seriously, there are places where this doesn't happen? I mean unless the roads deserted I pretty much have to use my car as a battering ram to change lanes. If some one nearly runs me down in the crosswalk they give me the finger for crossing the road with the signal. Walking into the grocery store people place their carts perpendicular to the isle, blocking the whole thing and mutter a-hole under their breath when you ask to get by. Not 100% of the time, but enough past 50% it's really made me a misanthrope.

I wish I could say why or what could change to make things different.
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Old 03-06-2009, 01:57 PM
 
2,751 posts, read 5,347,833 times
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Have you ever walked into a restaurant, taken a seat and wanted to walk right out again? Something told you the vibe was just not right, not a smile or a pleasant expression on the faces of any of the workers. The waitress finally makes her way over to your table and says, "Yeah?"

This is what it is like in America today, not just Baton Rouge. Allow me to generalize; people are miserable, their in danger of losing their houses and or their jobs. They have no or inadequate health care. They can't afford to take their family to a nice restaurant let alone on an annual vacation. Their marriages are suffering because he/she and their spouse both work, so they hardly ever see each other, and when they do they're too tired to see past the stack of dirty dishes in the sink. Their kids have long been left to their own devices, either in the hands of the disinterested or just on their own, kids they can't afford to send to college, kids that have less a chance than they did of having a better life than their parents.

So much for the trickle down theory. Even the meager expectations of a trickle have not been met, more like a slow drip once the greedy CEO's get their fill. For too many Americans, the only thing that has trickled down is misery. Why would they be courteous in traffic?
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Old 03-06-2009, 03:18 PM
 
Location: Portland, Oregon
7,084 posts, read 12,014,797 times
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I'd put dollars to donuts on the fact that when people starting relaxing things, it got worse...and when it starts as a kid it's hard to stop. When my parents were a kid, if you failed something you got the F and tough luck...you should have done better kid (and usually got a good whoop from the parents). Now a days, if a kid fails the parents go into the principals office and have a tantrum of threats and intimidation until their kid is allowed to pass...and they usually blame the teacher.

After school it's just as bad. Parents who doesn't like the coach not giving their kid star billing...or the ref makes an unfavorable call...well, just beat them up. It doesn't matter if they win either, they get a trophy for showing up. If they aren't at other activities and get in trouble, not the parents fault for not supervising them or the kids fault for doing it....it's TV's fault, or video games, or peer pressure, or anything else that's not direct responsibility.

Grow up like that and I have no doubts people will be conceited and down right mean, I've seen it in my own peers. Why not? It's everyone elses fault for everything. People get used to doing what they want, and with few to no consequences for being a total jerk. If they actually do something wrong they can have tantrums till the other person gets tired of dealing with them.
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Old 03-06-2009, 03:57 PM
 
Location: Barrington
63,919 posts, read 46,456,708 times
Reputation: 20674
Entitlement Theory
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Old 03-06-2009, 04:01 PM
Caa Caa started this thread
 
940 posts, read 2,479,449 times
Reputation: 260
Quote:
Originally Posted by subsound View Post
I'd put dollars to donuts on the fact that when people starting relaxing things, it got worse...and when it starts as a kid it's hard to stop. When my parents were a kid, if you failed something you got the F and tough luck...you should have done better kid (and usually got a good whoop from the parents). Now a days, if a kid fails the parents go into the principals office and have a tantrum of threats and intimidation until their kid is allowed to pass...and they usually blame the teacher.

After school it's just as bad. Parents who doesn't like the coach not giving their kid star billing...or the ref makes an unfavorable call...well, just beat them up. It doesn't matter if they win either, they get a trophy for showing up. If they aren't at other activities and get in trouble, not the parents fault for not supervising them or the kids fault for doing it....it's TV's fault, or video games, or peer pressure, or anything else that's not direct responsibility.

Grow up like that and I have no doubts people will be conceited and down right mean, I've seen it in my own peers. Why not? It's everyone elses fault for everything. People get used to doing what they want, and with few to no consequences for being a total jerk. If they actually do something wrong they can have tantrums till the other person gets tired of dealing with them.
All of you have the same feelings as I do! It is good (I guess) to know that I am not alone in my "sadness" so to speak about the culture of our society! Do you think iit is the same way, say, in Europe? I have heard Americans are among the nicest in the world...could have fooled me. The first poster was right, people are in fear of losing lots of things right now so being nice is not a priority, but still, life is too short to be a jerk! Thanks for your replies!
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Old 03-07-2009, 07:52 AM
 
Location: Boston MA, by way of NYC
2,763 posts, read 6,740,046 times
Reputation: 507
No Caa, in sadness, I tell you that many out there feel like you do. We are in a very sad state of affairs here in the US. The callusness that people exhibit is unconcienable. I live in NY, I deal with so many different cultures, some of which, I think are raised to be rude. They have to be because a normal person (at least what you and I may think of as normal), would never conciously do these things. I have been told it is because in there country they have been taught that it is a dog eat dog world and you have shove your way to the front of the line. I'm saddened that we as Americans didn't make the other cultures adjust to our way of life, rather we adjusted to theirs. Therefore, enhancing this I don't give a crap about you attitude. Did we have idiots before yes, but i think the level to which it has grown is astounding.
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Old 03-07-2009, 02:28 PM
Caa Caa started this thread
 
940 posts, read 2,479,449 times
Reputation: 260
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chelsa1075 View Post
No Caa, in sadness, I tell you that many out there feel like you do. We are in a very sad state of affairs here in the US. The callusness that people exhibit is unconcienable. I live in NY, I deal with so many different cultures, some of which, I think are raised to be rude. They have to be because a normal person (at least what you and I may think of as normal), would never conciously do these things. I have been told it is because in there country they have been taught that it is a dog eat dog world and you have shove your way to the front of the line. I'm saddened that we as Americans didn't make the other cultures adjust to our way of life, rather we adjusted to theirs. Therefore, enhancing this I don't give a crap about you attitude. Did we have idiots before yes, but i think the level to which it has grown is astounding.
Yes you are right and it is sad! I have almost gotten to the point of depression about why people just cannot be nice! Is it really that hard to help out your fellow man? Good Grief!
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