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Glad to hear there are others out there like us. We're not "toxic" toward children by any means . . . we just prefer to be a really great aunt and uncle over being parents! It gives us the freedom to travel as we see fit and spend our money on the things that make us happy rather than the things that would make children happy.
So do you find it hard to meet others of the same mindset? And how often do you get the "What do you mean 'no children'? My children are the best thing that ever happened to me . . ." questions/comments. Do you have any really great come-backs?
Hubby and I have started saying things like "Our dog doesn't talk back" or "I'm glad you're children make you happy; vacations make us happy."
We also just finished our basement . . . it's our own personal sports bar--pool table, 6 televisions, 13-foot long stocked bar. Try that with children in the house. LOL
We're a bit older (early 50's) but can identify with you, as we are also childless by (difficult) choice. Unfortunately you'll be living with those types of comments--and pitiful looks--for a long, long time! I personally don't think clever come-backs do much good, as they can sound a bit defensive. I've found that ignoring them worked best for me, although an honest explanation can sometimes help. Although I admit that it's been more difficult to meet people over the past 20 years, I've found it easier to develop close friendships with other childless couples, since they have more time and energy to socialize.
Now that I'm a little older, I do wonder at times if our decision was the "right" one. Our peers are now starting to have grandkids, and older folks often receive help and support from their kids. Luckily we have lots of siblings and nieces/nephews spread around the States that we can visit anytime.
We also just finished our basement . . . it's our own personal sports bar--pool table, 6 televisions, 13-foot long stocked bar. Try that with children in the house. LOL
I don't want to have kids. Too expensive. All that education, clothing, healthcare expense is something I can't afford currently and might not be able to in the future either with higher food/gas prices.
Ok, I'm KIND of in the same boat. I'm in my late 30's, I have a fiance who is in his early 30's. He never wanted to have kids, my kids are both adults now (and one is moved out), we have a great time together BUT often find it difficult to meet others in are age range who don't already have YOUNG kids or who don't have ticking biological clocks! I grew up in Florida and back in the day, this is what you did. You finish school, get married and have kids. After my divorce many years ago, I was single, dating and loving it but even then, had a hard time meeting man that didn't want to have kids or who didn't already have very young kids. I got a head start for sure but still like to hang out with young-minded, fun loving adults and just have the hardest time finding the happy medium. As of now, my fiance and I have one friend (actually a married couple) that are kind of friends but they have two small kids. When we get married, we have already decided NO kids. So even at that time, we are going to meet a conflict (but will cross that bridge when we come to it). So, I do totally know where everyone is coming from the only difference is that I have kids. For the record, I don't have a problem with anyone not wanting kids. I think it's a great choice to make and my daughter and I were talking about this yesterday, probably if I had waited longer, I might be one of you childless people. She said the same thing, if she doesn't have kids in her mid 20's, she won't at all. And oh yeah, I definitely want to come check out the new basement!!! LOL
Jello, DH and I are in the same position. Very few social friends. Would love to meet more childless couples . . .
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