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Not interested in the religious side of it... Ill go with the history of leaving my remains..I visit graveyards all over the UK and Ireland and it fascinates me reading the stones , ages, family , dates etc.... no amount of ashes can leave this..
The natural way for a body to decay is to gradually rot and return to the basic minerals. Cremation merely hastens this process. Embalming extends the time that the body needs to return to it's beginnings.
Why extend the amount of time that the body needs to return "to dust"? Death is death.
To properly embalm the body, the embalming fluid has to be massaged into all places. And I do mean ALL. Think about that. Also, in order to keep the internals organs for a few days until the funeral, all of the organs have to be punctured and injected with the embalming fluid. Sounds like "respect for the deceased" doesn't it!!!
I think a lot of the feelings about cremation vs. embalming goes back to the old revival tent messages of Rising from the Dead and Assending into Heaven. The older folks seemed to believe that if the body was embalmed, it would be ready to rise.
When a dead body decays unembalmed, it actually putrifies. It doesn't turn to "ashes"...it turns into a soggy mess. An embalmed body decays in a drier, cleaner, manner and eventually does turn more to ashes.
Cremation burns all the organs and soft tissue leaving the bones behind (the rest is vaporized). The bones then are pulverized. What you get back are not ashes but bone chips.
Proper embalming doesn't require massaging to ALL places....it basically follows the arterial system throughout the body. The purpose is only to last a few days for a viewing and funeral.
The funeral and viewing is not for the dead but for the living. Many studies have shown that it is therapeutic for those left behind.
To address some of the falsehoods I've seen written in this thread...
Most "family owned" funeral homes are also corporations. It's a fact of business today that they incorporate. Large funeral home corporations and family operated funeral homes are in competition with each other. Therefore their pricing is competitive with each other. Pricing tends to vary geographically and not according to ownership. It's all up to what the local area will bare.
The Federal Trade Commission dictates that ALL funeral homes disclose their pricing - even over the phone. One can shop around and see who's prices are best.
People haven't been buried alive since modern medicine came into being. All those wires and tubes actually work! A heart monitor doesn't lie!
There is no law saying you have to buried in a cement vault. Jews and Muslims do not use them. A cemetery has the right to require them. But the real reason for them is to keep the ground level on the surface and to prevent a sudden cave-in from a casket deteriorating and caving in with 8 tons of first on top of it. Remember, they have to mow and trim the surface so it could be dangerous.
Cremations haven't increased in price because more people are doing it. They've increased just like everything increases. The cost of gasoline to transport you has increased. The cost of the gas fired crematory has quadrupled...and it takes a LOT of gas! That said, if you pay over $2000 for an immediate cremation (you don't have to buy an urn) you got gouged.
Also...when you compare funeral prices, be sure to compare apples to apples...the same amount of services and exact casket and vault. And remember that things like what the flowers cost, what the cemetery charges to dig the grave, and the cost of the obituary all are NOT part of the funeral bill. Those are over and above the funeral homes' charges. Many times, for your convenience, the funeral home advances those charges to you but doesn't (by law) make any profit on them.
One of the largest reasons funeral prices increase is due to a litigious society. In other words, a funeral home is a semi-public building and everyone is sue crazy today. So insurance costs have driven up funeral prices. You expect a nice hearse without rust and no brakes. They cost huge dollars. Then they too mudt br insured. That, and of course salaries....you expect decent people to serve you and decent people aren't going to work cheap (not to mention the education involved.....most States require college plus mortuary schooling = $$$).
My husband will be cremated this coming Monday. I am having a little bit of a hard time with this but the cost of being buried the traditional way is VERY expensive. He did mention he wanted to be cremated once or twice so I guess it is okay.
Lucky Lady....you have my heartfelt condolences. I am so sorry to hear of you loss.
Not interested in the religious side of it... Ill go with the history of leaving my remains..I visit graveyards all over the UK and Ireland and it fascinates me reading the stones , ages, family , dates etc.... no amount of ashes can leave this..
I do this as well, in the states. I have actually done research on people and causes of death, etc. It seemed there were a lot of young children and babies dying all around a certain time period of one graveyard I visited and it turned out it was due to improper pasteurization of milk during that time......
Not interested in the religious side of it... Ill go with the history of leaving my remains..I visit graveyards all over the UK and Ireland and it fascinates me reading the stones , ages, family , dates etc.... no amount of ashes can leave this..
Ashes can also be buried, with a marker. Or the ashes can be placed in a niche with a memorial marker. I know what you mean about visiting graves and markers, I am interested in geneaology, too.
Thank you for your "experienced" (?) post, Bludy-L. You are in the business? I just KNEW the funeral home where my husband's family does business with was a rip-off! $6,000 for cremation...hog wash. That's why I chose the place I did at $1,395. So crematoriums have machines that pulverize bones? That must cost a pretty penny also.
kevxu, I think Pik just personally does not want to be cremated. It's all a matter of what one is comfortable with. Me, I'm just the opposite. I'd rather be cremated. Either way, we all shall face God.
Thank you for your "experienced" (?) post, Bludy-L. You are in the business? I just KNEW the funeral home where my husband's family does business with was a rip-off! $6,000 for cremation...hog wash. That's why I chose the place I did at $1,395. So crematoriums have machines that pulverize bones? That must cost a pretty penny also.
My family has been in the business for generations. I grew up in a funeral home. The present place has been a funeral home for 111 years.
Yes...$6000 is nothing but price gouging IF all it was was an immediate cremation without any viewing or services. If that funeral home had their own crematory, they pocketed even more!
Not only do they pulverize the bones (which are super brittle after the cremation) but they also sift the cremains to remove teeth and any metal such as melted metal buttons, etc.
$1395 is about right - give or take a bit for the local marketplace.
A crematorium costs in excess of $70,000. There are TONS of EPA regulations that require all kinds of safeguards on your emissions. Then the cost of the natural gas involved. Insurance and malpractice insurance. All those things cost big bucks that have to be justified and recuperated on a per case basis. Obviously they can't operate them in the red and remain in business.
All this talk of cost....everyone I've buried had provided a life insurance policy specifically for their burial. For both my parents, the policy was $15,000 each. The plots had been purchased years ago. I used $5000 in each case to pay my expenses flying back and forth, hotel, food, also to close down their home, pack, store, and move their stuff, etc.
I just told the funeral home I had $10,000 to spend. We had a nice funeral (well we should for that money!). I just never saw a funeral as a time to price haggle, especially if there's money---ie insurance--specified for that purpose.
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