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juneau,
Yes. It is a lonely process. I know what you mean.
The birthdays, Holidays, everyone goes on with life,
did you ever think, they did exsist people! And now they are
gone!
It will get better. Believe it or not, it will.
We all die, its the people who are left behind to deal with the
loss that suffer the most.
Life goes on, and all in all, be glad you had people in your short life
here on earth to care about so much that you still miss them.
How lucky you were, to have that love.
Smile, because your loved ones who are gone would want you to.
Most of my friends don't mention my husband or sons anymore. (On their own.)...My friends relate to me as a single woman today. And in reality, this is "who I am" and my new status in life.. Thankfully, my friends are willing to listen when I bring-up my husband or sons myself. I like to talk about happy times and happy memories every once in awhile. (Just to keep my loved ones "alive!")...My friends seem to enjoy my stories. And, it opens up the door for them to share their memories too and talk about their loved ones who have passed-away through the years...But most of the time, I talk about my current life as a single person today. I have to figure out "who I am" now and what I might want and need for myself. My life has to go "on." Can't bury myself in sand or hide out in a cave forever. (This is what I tell myself anyway!)
No one mentions my husband until I do. I mention him when it's relevant to some sort of story I'm telling.
I used to be somebody, and I don't mean my husband's wife. I used to have interests and do things. I can't get up enough of a head of steam to do those things any more.
No one mentions my husband until I do. I mention him when it's relevant to some sort of story I'm telling.
I used to be somebody, and I don't mean my husband's wife. I used to have interests and do things. I can't get up enough of a head of steam to do those things any more.
Yes! This ^^^^^^^^^! I have lost all interest in doing anything! Just thinking about showering and going out to the store makes me tired. I don't feel bad, I just have no interest in doing much of anything. Just enough to survive on a day by day basis.
I was doing very well, my life was turning around and I lost my two precious Maltese girls within six weeks a apart and I lost my best friend due to parting of the ways after 25 years being friends, and it seemed I was almost in the very same spot I was in when I first lost my husband, confused, dumfounded, grief stricken, sad, lonely, depressed and it just goes on.
Sadly, I have no family or close friends nearby so I just try to do the best I can do under the circumstances. Huh, I remember a year ago I phoned my only sibling, a brother and he is rotten to the core and he told me at least he has family and laughed in my face. Wow, you talk about mean spirited. I believe people can get mean because they are not happy in their life.
I wish all of you a life full of peace, love and contentment. I know we will never be the same after our experience of "loss" but we all need to be loved, feel love and respected by others. May the beauty of life and the love you receive from others give to you strength. I know I am grateful to be a part of this grief group. Blessings to you all.
I was doing very well, my life was turning around and I lost my two precious Maltese girls within six weeks a apart and I lost my best friend due to parting of the ways after 25 years being friends, and it seemed I was almost in the very same spot I was in when I first lost my husband, confused, dumfounded, grief stricken, sad, lonely, depressed and it just goes on.
Sadly, I have no family or close friends nearby so I just try to do the best I can do under the circumstances. Huh, I remember a year ago I phoned my only sibling, a brother and he is rotten to the core and he told me at least he has family and laughed in my face. Wow, you talk about mean spirited. I believe people can get mean because they are not happy in their life.
I wish all of you a life full of peace, love and contentment. I know we will never be the same after our experience of "loss" but we all need to be loved, feel love and respected by others. May the beauty of life and the love you receive from others give to you strength. I know I am grateful to be a part of this grief group. Blessings to you all.
Wow, smilin'! That is cruel. I'm sorry you had to go through that! You, my dear, are stronger than you realize. To endure the losses, to endure that slap in the face from your sibling? You are strong. I am very glad to have found this part of C-D too.
Location: West of the Catalinas East of the Tortolitas
4,922 posts, read 8,575,923 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tamiznluv
Yes! This ^^^^^^^^^! I have lost all interest in doing anything! Just thinking about showering and going out to the store makes me tired. I don't feel bad, I just have no interest in doing much of anything. Just enough to survive on a day by day basis.
It's only been in the last few months that I've felt like resuming some of the things I used to love to do. The hardest was canning tomatoes. Every Labor Day weekend, Bob would bring home 100# of tomatoes from a farmer he knew at our local Farmer's market and we'd spend the whole weekend putting up tomatoes. We also did pickles, jams, applesauce, peaches, etc. So, this year I decided I'd try putting up just a few jars of tomatoes myself. I enjoyed doing it, but I deeply missed the companionship of a shared activity. It was nothing like when we did it together, but I liked the feeling of doing something familiar. I've also gone back to doing some sewing which I used to do a lot of. So, at almost the five year mark, I'm dipping my toe back in life again. It's still very lonely, though, but there is a small amount of satisfaction in it.
Location: West of the Catalinas East of the Tortolitas
4,922 posts, read 8,575,923 times
Reputation: 8044
Smilin' I'm so sorry that your brother was so awful to you. And I understand the losses of your precious "girls". I lost one of my Yorkies about 7 months after Bob died, and it was like pouring salt on the wound. I finally got my lonely Yorkie a "sister" last November, three and a half years later. I'm really glad I did as it helped Cassie by giving her a friend, and it's fun having a lively little one around. I think my next hurdle will be my cats. They're 13 and 11, so they're getting up there.
It's ironic that you talk about tomatoes and and sewing. I can see to can, but not to thread a needle. I have more sewing stuff than I know what to do with now.
When I was younger I put up a bushel a day. I don't need a 100 quarts of tomatoes now. I cook for one. Some times I vac pack, or freeze leftovers, and sometime I just can't stand the sight of the food; it brings back too many memories.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marcy1210
It's only been in the last few months that I've felt like resuming some of the things I used to love to do. The hardest was canning tomatoes. Every Labor Day weekend, Bob would bring home 100# of tomatoes from a farmer he knew at our local Farmer's market and we'd spend the whole weekend putting up tomatoes. We also did pickles, jams, applesauce, peaches, etc. So, this year I decided I'd try putting up just a few jars of tomatoes myself. I enjoyed doing it, but I deeply missed the companionship of a shared activity. It was nothing like when we did it together, but I liked the feeling of doing something familiar. I've also gone back to doing some sewing which I used to do a lot of. So, at almost the five year mark, I'm dipping my toe back in life again. It's still very lonely, though, but there is a small amount of satisfaction in it.
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