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A cold but lovely morning here. Frost covering all the hills! Had a restless night but that isn't unusual. Today I am going to really make an effort to do some cleaning around here--wish me luck on that one. I use to be so on top of cleaning and this year I keep getting behind. I have the time but no desire or energy. I'm sure it's is all just another part of this horrible grief and like everything else it just takes time. Patience--that is what I must practice on! Have a lovely day all.
I have all the symptoms, fed now by anniversaries: wedding, days in the hospital, and death.. all in a two week run... Reading of similar symptoms and knowing that we are not alone helps the conscious mind I hope. I see similar struggles among people I know in bereavement groups, I belong to two such groups. But, no Psychiatrist, yet. The symptoms seem to be common, and only time helps but doesn't cure for most of us I fear.
I also stopped taking Trazadone, and have had an eye itch, but think they are not related. Think that also added to my ongoing trouble sleeping.
Plan to visit the shelter today as my hernia operation recovery has gone well, that was done just last Monday. No heavy lifting for a month, but I walk small dogs and don't need to lift them anyway.
Cleaning house? Dust may be what is causing the eye itch. My eye is much reduced when I go outside.
Yes, grief has many common symptoms....I know every person is different but with a lot of the same feelings in the end. I wish there was a time we could put on the grief but sadly there doesn't seem to be. I know it will always be there to some degree. I think we need to work at helping ourselves get feeling better about life in general--like you going to your bereavement groups and working with the dogs--all very good things to help you get through this Jerry. I am finding myself stuck right now..yes, I have work but still need to get out more even if it's around my house working in the yard. I just can't muster up that needed ambition...
Perhaps buying a 1968 Datsun 411 Bluebird 4-door sedan and working on restoring it might help...I am considering it. My wife and I live in a small city in SW Kansas. I plan on retiring in 5 1/2 years at 62, but, you know, that is only a rough plan. Companies and the Federal government can interrupt the best laid plans of mice and men.
But I am thinking about buying an old Datsun sedan and rebuilding it to the point of being able to drive it safely one day. I will ask a good friend who is good at mechanics of all sorts to help me work on the car. Both of us have a spacious garage - his attached mine detached, in which to work on this rig. We all need things to engage our minds - I am still working and am planning on working another 5 1/2 years. I have followed this thread of yours and those you're communicating with on here and have just observed for a couple of weeks...I would love to be helpful to you guys who have suffered loss and would simply say this: let's help each other as we're able to. I work full time but work 3-12's and have 4 days off every week - for now. There could be one more day of work added every week as more work makes itself available.
I'm just coming from an area of someone who realizes that we have a tough time at times - and we ought to be able to help each other out. Just offering an idea I have - with the overall thought is it's good to keep our brains engaged and be as active as we can. Nice to meet you all!
Thanks for the input elkotronics. I get what you are saying by staying busy.
I picked up some vit. D yesterday and am not sure but probably should not have taken it at bedtimes. Had a very restless night. May have been the Vit D or maybe not. From now on it will be taken in the morning. Work today and I am pretty tired from lack of sleep. But once I get there maybe my head will start working! Cloudy and rainy looking today. Hope everyone has a blessed day!
I'd try taking the vitamin morning just in case. The "off label" results, like a sleep aid work sometimes and cause trouble other times... at least that's the case for taking prescription Trazadone. It is an antidepressant but my wife used it to help her sleep. It worked great for her. I've tried it for a year and I think either does nothing to aid sleep or it causes me to have more wake up periods, following troubling dreams. I am still taking a low does of Trazadone to move away from it and had a rancorous set of trouble mares last night. Most are fading away now... but I remember the stress of the dream when I wake up along with some detail and that sets my mind in a bad state to go back to sleep.
Why the extra vit D? Isn't that the sunshine vitamin, D?
I had a restless night myself. Might be something in the air. I was able to get some actual cleaning done yesterday. Shocked me as I have been like you, cynwld. But, for some reason the energy kicked in.
Try to have a good day. It's tough at times and that's about all we can do ..is try.
Thanks meo92953! Some how knowing I am not alone with certain feelings is a great help!
Yes Jerry, it is the sunshine drug! But we have had little sunshine so far this year and since I am inside most of the time and someone mentioned it to me I figured I'd give it a try.
cynwldkat - are you living in a grey during winter type place? I grew up in western Washington and the grey of that place is enough to drive a lot of people out of their minds, it's so grey and drizzly. I really couldn't sleep a full night last night, either. I slept from about 11:00PM - 3:00AM and had ta get up and get on the computer and watch TV. I couldn't sleep!
Oh, well Vitamin D certainly shouldn't hurt anyone but there might be an indication where someone should not take it for some medical reason that I can't think of right now. Hope everyone has a good night tonight, and can sleep!
I'm just about to start preparing our state & Federal taxes in a few minutes. Ugghh.
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Have a lovely day all.
