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This came to mind since I posted a response on another thread.
12 yrs ago my grandfather from my dads side found out he had cancer. He didnt tell anyone. Instead, a few days later, he killed himself.(out of all days, he did it on fathers day)
3 years later, his son also found out he had cancer (a different type) and he killed himself as well. Same way as well.
(if you are wondering how, they both stuck a gun in their mouth. My uncle actually used the same gun my grandfather did)
Maybe its a coincidence.. maybe my uncle just thought of his dad and decided to end it the same way.
It upsets me they left their families with unanswered questions and left to grieve always wondering if there was anything they couldve done. BUT I still understand why they did it...
Location: West of the Catalinas East of the Tortolitas
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Ernest Hemingway killed himself, as did his father before him, then his sister and brother, his son, and his granddaughter. But, that just one example, and they were a very troubled family. There are countless others where it was a lone act, or just a coincidence if more than one family member killed themselves.
And most men use a firearm to commit suicide, something that surprised me. I assumed most folks would overdose themselves but turns out that isn't the case, particularly with males.
I work with an organization that offers a suicide hotline to the community, and that is one of the things I have learned working with them. Also the leading cause of death for young folks is suicide. The advice we give parents is -- if your teen/young adult is in a depression or a depressive state of mind, do not have firearms in the home, as it is that common. And if they have firearms in their own homes, get them out of the house. In many cases, family members were not even aware the young person owned a firearm or they would have removed it.
So I think a combination of things. Depression is not that unusual for ANYONE's family. And using a firearm is not uncommon, either.
I am so sorry for your loss. Suicide is a final act of desperation. Your loved ones must have felt they simply couldn't face the future dealing with a terrible diagnosis.
When I was doing intake work at a mental health clinic....an important part of the family history was whether any members of the family had committed suicide. The psychiatrist considered that a significant indicator of risk. I don't think there is clinical proof of it being hereditary.....genetic.....but it does "run in some families". Depression can be a familial condition--and of course there is a strong link between depression and suicide.
There are many familial traits that are passed on.....whether it is genetic or learned....we don't know. Some of these family traits are positive some negative.
The important thing is our lives are not predetermined by family.....each individual can overcome heredity or familial culture....if your parents and uncles or aunts committed suicide doesn't predetermine anyone else's fate. Being aware however can be the impetus to seeking help and breaking the cycle.
I think there could be something hereditary mentally in the inability to cope and how to end it.
My first husband was very suicidal and he ended his life after we divorced. His mother - we all believe - purposely drank herself to death, an aunt hung herself, and another close relative ended his/her own life, too.
Yet I can't think of a single person in my own immediate family or distant relative who has done this.
This came to mind since I posted a response on another thread.
12 yrs ago my grandfather from my dads side found out he had cancer. He didnt tell anyone. Instead, a few days later, he killed himself.(out of all days, he did it on fathers day)
3 years later, his son also found out he had cancer (a different type) and he killed himself as well. Same way as well.
(if you are wondering how, they both stuck a gun in their mouth. My uncle actually used the same gun my grandfather did)
Maybe its a coincidence.. maybe my uncle just thought of his dad and decided to end it the same way.
It upsets me they left their families with unanswered questions and left to grieve always wondering if there was anything they couldve done. BUT I still understand why they did it...
Thoughts? Is it hereditary?
Depression and bipolar disorder run in families, bipolar especially. People are often driven to suicide because they suffer from these illnesses. So indirectly, suicide is hereditary.
Depression and other mood disorders are hereditary. But I also think that suicide can be "passed down" in families in a non-genetic way.
When someone commits suicide, they usually don't realize it, but by doing this, they are putting suicide on the "list of options" for the rest of their family and loved ones. Our families teach us "menus" that we choose from in deciding how to respond to different situations. In some families, there might be depression and anguish, but suicide never gets onto the menu of choices. With close, older relatives, like a parent, it's almost like their committing suicide gives "permission" for the younger person to do it in the future.
I had two clients who had severe episodic depression and who were repeatedly/chronically suicidal, and this idea was powerful enough to keep them from acting on their impulses again. One had adult children and small grandchildren, and when introduced to this idea, she decided firmly that she did not want them to "inherit" this from her, and that was a major factor in her staying alive. The other one had nieces and nephews to whom she was very close, and she also decided not to pass along this option to them. I really believe that this helped the niece, who also came to the same clinic, from ever trying suicide.
In a waiting room at a psychiatrist's office a few years ago I read a pamphlet that outlined the findings of some research regarding DNA links to suicidiality. The pamphlet stated that there is often a hereditary factor in sucidiality. It mentioned one specific chromosome or something, oh gosh I wish I had memorized the specifics, but that's all I've got right now..
I think about suicide but it doesn't seem to run in my family.
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