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This seems very natural to me. I had a similar experience with my husband's death. I think eventually, those thoughts will not be so ever-present. How long has it been since you lost your son?
This seems very natural to me. I had a similar experience with my husband's death. I think eventually, those thoughts will not be so ever-present. How long has it been since you lost your son?
I'm so sorry for your great loss. It's natural that you would be filled with thoughts of your son, it is so raw and recent too, but hard as it is to believe, it will get slightly easier with time. To lose a child seems the worst of all griefs, my heart goes out to you.
I agree. This is early days for you. If you want, you might ask your doctor for something to help you sleep, just for a short time, to decrease your exhaustion. I think that your inability to sleep after such a devastating loss is very understandable. It is important to take care of yourself. I know very well how one may have no interest in eating or in all kinds of other self care things. I hope that someone is there to help you with this. My son basically guided me for the first few weeks - made sure I rested, ate, took my meds, etc. Because I could think of nothing but my husband. But part of self care is allowing yourself to grieve. Do not be critical of yourself or push away all those thoughts of your son. I think that thinking those things over and over again is part of grieving, and will in the long run, help your recovery. We all want to cement in our minds those memories, and perhaps that is part of the process. But you won't forget - ever. Love is eternal. Blessings on you, in this heart breaking time.
Thanks to all for being there. I know it will take a long time. He was only 44 but had health issues. He's in a better place & at peace.
I do have a prescription for tramadol but I keep forgetting to take it. When I finally do get to sleep, last night/morning it was after 4 am. Slept til 1. And yes, I have to force myself to eat. I did order vegetables, chicken & fish on-line. I forgot to buy potatoes or rice but do have pasta.
I just don't want to cook it. It will get better, I know. And, not to worry, I certainly can afford to lose a few pounds. I do boil eggs & manage to get them down. Also have cheese & sardines so I'm okay for now.
The worst thing is that I have got to force myself to wash clothes, clean the apartment & take showers.
I think I'm going to have to breakdown and hire help, just until I am better & not so lethargic.
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