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Your points are very good. We visited HI every year for 2-3 weeks and when we started looking at retirement places we decided to rent on HI for a couple of months. Call it "island fever" or whatever, after three months we missed family and friends, missed being able to take off in our RV to another state (there is a LOT to see on the mainland), actually missed the four seasons too. So we ended up in upstate NY. Are able to go to HI for two months a year, head south or southwest for two months in the winter. In the spring we are home, and most of the summer, except for 2 week trips here or there (Michigan is one of them this year). So maybe those of us who are "nomadic" are the ones that HI is a little too perfect for us 24/7.
I could see where a retired person would want to travel.
I suppose the hard thing with this entire question is it varies so much with where a person is in life, there family ties, there this and that. We change interests and goals over time as well.
I absolutely love travel. But, as for the OP, being in Michigan, I didn't find MI that great of a springboard for interesting travel. Great Lakes are great during the summer, but generally people are cooped up in their houses all year around with a hopeful trip to Florida once a year.
In that sense, Hawaii looks pretty good.
But, if a person is retired and wants to travel around and such, than being locked up on an island would seem quite bleak.
On the other hand, if a person was isolated in Michigan and wanted to travel...you'd have a good 10-15 hours south or 20-30 hours west to get out of flat cornfield lands. Technically you could drive into Canada or New York, but than it still looks a bit like upstate Michigan anyways.
Phanos9999 Seriously? You wouldn't even pay $500 a month to help your parents out while you a married/working person are living in their house? And you brag about staying with friends for free? Okay, your parents could not afford to attend your wedding in Aruba. I bet that cost some money they could not afford. I hear you are angry that they did not tell you of their financial problems sooner. I would guess they are proud people who did not want to burden you with the truth or they were simply embarrassed about their financial circumstances. I think you need to do some soul searching. Families are important and worth forgiving.
Believe it or not, families are important but not all family get along. I was the only one working at the time as my wife could not find work (which is why we are moving to hawai'i because that was the only job offer she had for a teaching position) so it was only my income. And paying my parents 500.00 a month (more than half their house note) for 5 months when I work 50-60 hours week, 6-7 days a week and just really needed a place to sleep I feel is a bit much.
Anyways, I could not of stayed there anyways as we have a dog (a little yorkiepoo) and my parents said they would absolutely not allow our dog to stay there, even outside.
I have done some soul searching And I always thought parents were right and had your best interests at heart.... I now think otherwise..... If my grown child needed to live with me for 5 months to make a life/career change (not for years playing video games, partying, and sitting on their butt), as long as they could feed themselves and perhaps pay for my electricity change if I was on hard times that would be enough....
I would not ask him to pay $2,500.00 in 5 months to live with me when he has to pay his car note, support his wife until she starts working august 1st and needs to be financially supported as she needed to go to houston (food and housing were paid) for training and he needed to pay his friend $1,500.00 to buy his car as his own broke down.
We had 10,000.00 in savings but all that was used to move our stuff, the car, the dog, and a down payment on our new place. So I just needed a little help..... I ask you guys, am I a prick for asking that of my parents?
When I told them when they got too old to take care of themselves they can move in with me and my wife there? I now think otherwise with that.... When me and my wife were broke and on hard times, my family was around us a lot. But, when we got on our feet, got good jobs, my wife finished college and got this job in hawai'i most of them changed except my friends...... And I don't understand why?????
I don't think what you asked of your parents was unreasonable at all, Phanos; they sound like they were being judgmental about you moving and obviously if you could afford to pay $500 a month in rent you would have just gotten an apartment. Personally, I have found that friends, or even strangers sometimes have shown more kindness than my blood relatives have. I'm very happy to be as far away from those people as possible. "Family is important" might be true, but you get to make your own family of the people you choose.
it's sometimes hard for people to express their emotions.
as an outside observer, it's clear to see that your family didn't want you to move to hawaii, because they wanted you to be with them. once they felt this bridge was burnt, they retaliated with the rent.
i have heard many horror stories from people moving to hawaii from the mainland, with parents threatening to cut off all contact as punishment for leaving them. do you have children, that may help you rebuild ties, if not you will see, only time will tell.
It's also possible the parents were financially hurting as well...hard to say. I wouldn't take it too personal though. If you were able to live with them for 5 months, than you probably have some kind of healthy relationship.
If I were to go back to MI and had to live with my parents, I don't see it mentally possible for myself to live in their house for that long. Since I'm so far away, every few years, I try to make an effort to visit them for a couple weeks at a time, and by about the third day I'm ready to go.
I am tired of these people talking crap about getting island fever and are moving back to the mainland for that reason..... WAKE UP!
If you are leaving Hawai'i, then it should be to europe, the asian countries or my personal favorite Australia not back to the mainland. Go someplace just as wonderful as Hawai'i and not backwards to the land where there are more jerks than good people.............
Uhm, lady, have you ever LIVED Hawaii?
This haole girl can tell you da real truth about Hawaii nei. I've lived in the Hawaiian hood, I've picked up dog after dog that people let roam free, I've paid through the nose for cheese and puff pastry. I've been called "haole" because I am white. I've lived Hawaii, and while it is beautiful country, it is currently in quite a bit of a funk.
Europe? REALLY? are you freaking kidding me? I'm not a socialist.
Asia? Honestly, I've had enough of Asian people looking down their noses at me.
At some point, you just want some apple pie and to not be looked at funny because you are pale faced.
It's also possible the parents were financially hurting as well...hard to say. I wouldn't take it too personal though. If you were able to live with them for 5 months, than you probably have some kind of healthy relationship.
If I were to go back to MI and had to live with my parents, I don't see it mentally possible for myself to live in their house for that long. Since I'm so far away, every few years, I try to make an effort to visit them for a couple weeks at a time, and by about the third day I'm ready to go.
Well, I used to. But I have not spoken to my parents in about 2.5 months. The last time I did, I went over there to get my comic book collection and my mother said I better continue to pay my student loans. My wife rolled her eyes as we have kept them up to date for 2 years except once. The one time was the loan people's mistake but due to my father not having the greatest of credit they hit his credit and he lost a credit card and they blamed me.
He got it removed from his credit because it was an error, but he never got his credit card back. In my wife rolling her eyes my mother hit the roof, called my wife a b.... and made some mean comments about how her mother hates her...... And tried to physically fight her, my father forced her into the basement.
I was shocked and ashamed by all of this and have not been back since and they didn't call me on my birthday so I can say our relationship is broken.
And my parents are going through very hard times, my mother was laid off and my father work in electronics and has to try to find gigs here and there to make ends meet.... I believe that their financial problems have led them to change as people and the hard times have made them more depressed....
Maybe in a few years things will get better but not right now........
i am truly sorry that the separation from your family has been so traumatic.
it's understandable that you will need to muster all the strength and determination with your courageous decision to move, but that shouldn't be at the expense of being judgmental or dismissive of others, they are not weak for having island fever or having second thoughts. many people work hard but when things don't work out, it's not that they haven't tried.
the mainland isn't all bad (this is coming from someone as an ethnic minority there), hawaii isn't all good (this is coming from someone not an ethnic minority here), and asia and europe have problems too (been to both). life's complicated like that, but.
Aloha, for all of you that don't think island fever is real...guess what it is!!! I live in Maui Hawaii-the best island. The symptoms of island fever are the same as cabin fever. Clautrophobia, irritability and depression. I haven't been off island for 4 and half years (my last trip, Thailand-Cambodia). I have lived in Maui for 11 years. For the local person (born in Hawaii) I don't think they ever get island fever-cause they are used to stying in one place. I am from California originally-there I could drive anywhere I wanted to or take a short flight and be somewhere different. I am a world traveler. Been to several countries. In my experience what happens with island fever is you feel this immediate urge to be somewhere else-see different things. In Maui (although every beautiful) everything looks the same and all you can do is drive around in circles-plus endless sunshine, little rain-I need rain and cooler weather at this point. I plan to move to the highlands of Arizona, when I can get out of debt from our horrible recession and save enough for a down payment for a condo. There I will be able to tavel by plane or car and be some place different within 1-2 hours. The flights off this rock are expensive, a lot more than what you mainlanders pay to come here. Island fever is real. I know mine would go away if I could afford to get off this rock for 3 weeks-but that would set me back too much and then that would mean I would have to live here longer. I can't wait to move back to the mainland-I'll visit Maui, but never live here again. Michelle
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And I always thought parents were right and had your best interests at heart.... I now think otherwise..... If my grown child needed to live with me for 5 months to make a life/career change (not for years playing video games, partying, and sitting on their butt), as long as they could feed themselves and perhaps pay for my electricity change if I was on hard times that would be enough.... 
