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I was a late bloomer. When I met my husband he already owned a house. He had bought it on land contract from a family member and had it almost paid off when I met him. He is older than me and had already established himself. I moved from my parents home into his home. Although I had to pay rent (half of my mother's mortgage) I didnt really view it as my home. I just paid her the money per month. I was set to get an apartment with a friend but that went bust and by that time my husband and I knew we were headed for marriage so I moved in with him. Once we got married we got a home together. He had a sizable down payment from the sale of his house and we bought an estate sale that needed a lot of updates. The house was inexpensive and we completely rehabbed the house within the first year. It was an exciting time. Buy a house, completely gut it and replace it all with the latest greatest stuff.
After we had our child the neighborhood started going to hell and we had to make some tough decisions on moving. We needed a safer area, better schools and the real estate boom was in full swing. We made a ton on the sale of our house but real estate prices were unreal, so while we made a ton others were selling their homes for a ton as well. For us to move to a nicer area meant both of our incomes were needed and I think that is when I felt more like an adult, I guess. I had a child I was responsible for and my income that had been mostly disposal at that point, was now a much needed means to get us out. We moved into our second house together as a married couple and there was no big bucks to blow on rehabbing our new place. We had to live with the 70's kitchen, horrific wallpaper and do things more slowly. My "first" house came easy because my husband made it happen. The ones after that were more work and worry. So I think as strange as it sounds, my second house really felt like my first.
No, I had been an adult for quite awhile before I bought my first house. It did make me feel very proud though because I had saved for years and it was a major accomplishment on my income.
I like that! I'm buying my first home now and lamenting the fact I can't rehab everything I don't like immediately (I'm still going to try, reality hasn't caught up with me). So living with 70s wall paper for a bit, I can understand.
Anyway congrats on your first and second home!
Quote:
Originally Posted by fallingwater
I was a late bloomer. When I met my husband he already owned a house. He had bought it on land contract from a family member and had it almost paid off when I met him. He is older than me and had already established himself. I moved from my parents home into his home. Although I had to pay rent (half of my mother's mortgage) I didnt really view it as my home. I just paid her the money per month. I was set to get an apartment with a friend but that went bust and by that time my husband and I knew we were headed for marriage so I moved in with him. Once we got married we got a home together. He had a sizable down payment from the sale of his house and we bought an estate sale that needed a lot of updates. The house was inexpensive and we completely rehabbed the house within the first year. It was an exciting time. Buy a house, completely gut it and replace it all with the latest greatest stuff.
After we had our child the neighborhood started going to hell and we had to make some tough decisions on moving. We needed a safer area, better schools and the real estate boom was in full swing. We made a ton on the sale of our house but real estate prices were unreal, so while we made a ton others were selling their homes for a ton as well. For us to move to a nicer area meant both of our incomes were needed and I think that is when I felt more like an adult, I guess. I had a child I was responsible for and my income that had been mostly disposal at that point, was now a much needed means to get us out. We moved into our second house together as a married couple and there was no big bucks to blow on rehabbing our new place. We had to live with the 70's kitchen, horrific wallpaper and do things more slowly. My "first" house came easy because my husband made it happen. The ones after that were more work and worry. So I think as strange as it sounds, my second house really felt like my first.
I'm 26, we are in contract for our first house, with all the paperwork leading up to closing, dealing with home inspectors, appraisors, attorneys, insurance companies, title companies, sellers, RE agents, and the bank, it feels like growing up.
Now I'll have to mow my own lawn, shovel my own snow, and make sure MY HOUSE has curb appeal. Didn't have that when I was in an apartment, the responsiblity makes me feel like an adult...
Anyway, I think the feeling is greater if it's your own time and money going in. As in the case for fallingwater, it was her husband's money for the most part. My wife feels the same way you did. All she did was give me a big smile when we viewed the house. As the sole provider of income, the paperwork and processes after we decided we want the house has been all handled by me. She's excited about the purchase but to her it's like going shopping and buying something really expensive. Ultimate retail therapy I guess. Already she's drawing out which walls to knock down, what room to blow out, what granite and stainless appliances she is going to buy... I wish the reality was like that. I guess it hasn't clicked to her that our monthly expenses are going up and our savings are going to be drained after closing.
We bought a 100 y/o fixer upper. Though we bought way below our budget it's going to be a slow process updating all the things we don't like...
I was in my 30s. I had 4 children. I had been practicing law for seven years and I was either a partner or about to become a partner in a highly regarded law firm.
If I did not already feel like an adult by then, it just was not going to happen.
Mostly I felt scared. I did not know whether we could afford it. We bought it with 3% down and had to borrow money for part of the down payment, for closing costs, moving costs, and other things. We were massively in debt from student loans and out of control spending when from when we first moved to California. My wife had just stopped working to stay home with the kids. I had just bought my first new car and my wifes car was on its last legs. We had almost no furniture and none that was suitable for the house. Every inch of the house needed attention. I did not know if we really wanted to live in that city. I was unsure whether my wife really liked it or just wanted to go along with me. So if anything I was a bit scared that it was a bad decision. (Turned out well. We bought it for $175K and sold it for $757K 9 years later, loved living there and restoring it and came to love the city and the neighborhood. Our kids still remember that first thanksgiving sitting on blankets on the floor of the dining room as a fond memory).
I bought my house at age 38. I didn't feel adult then and I'm 45 now and still don't. lol I bought it out of disgust of my 10 year rental rate going up past my income, turned out I could own a home cheaper. So it seemed anyway. Had to do it, all inclusive the house payment was $100 less than my rent. Too bad I lost my job 1 month later. 7 years later I still have the house and its now a rental, waiting for a tenant, last one left end of October. No, still don't feel like an adult, feel like a kid with too many responsibilities.
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So I think as strange as it sounds, my second house really felt like my first.
