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Old 12-20-2022, 01:56 PM
 
465 posts, read 303,913 times
Reputation: 420

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I don't know if this is an overreaction. I've been working in a large city for over 16 years. I've been through a lot of good (moved up in pay, title, valuable experiences) but also the bad (mental health, sacrifices). For the majority of those 16 years, I've been commuting from out of state where the commute takes me 90-120 minutes. Three years ago, I put my foot down I would change things and work to make life better for myself. That meant exploring new opportunities or exploring if I could work remotely. Then the pandemic happened and we were all remote. For the past two years, I've been going in a few days a week and it's been a perfect mix.

This month, my company mandated that all workers needed to be in at least four days a week (starting in January) and they'd be monitoring badge swipes and sending in weekly reports, and also threatening disciplinary actions in a company-wide email. I asked around for flexibility and there's none. Given the tone of the company, I've been upset the last week and in a state of panic. I generally like what I do there but I can't take more years of this commute and housing is astronomically high.

After that went out, I frantically started applying to places. I found a company where I'd be doing sort of a similar role. Even better is that they're 10-15 minutes down the road from where my condo is. I had a few interviews with this company and they offered me a role. I understand you have to factor in the cost of living but is it worth a 17% hit in salary? It's still ok money. Working for 16 years at the same company, I don't have much experience negotiating and afraid of leaving too much on the table, in exchange for my mental health.
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Old 12-20-2022, 04:33 PM
 
Location: Vermont
9,457 posts, read 5,225,471 times
Reputation: 17918
Quote:
Originally Posted by jvmillion83 View Post
I don't know if this is an overreaction. I've been working in a large city for over 16 years. I've been through a lot of good (moved up in pay, title, valuable experiences) but also the bad (mental health, sacrifices). For the majority of those 16 years, I've been commuting from out of state where the commute takes me 90-120 minutes. Three years ago, I put my foot down I would change things and work to make life better for myself. That meant exploring new opportunities or exploring if I could work remotely. Then the pandemic happened and we were all remote. For the past two years, I've been going in a few days a week and it's been a perfect mix.

This month, my company mandated that all workers needed to be in at least four days a week (starting in January) and they'd be monitoring badge swipes and sending in weekly reports, and also threatening disciplinary actions in a company-wide email. I asked around for flexibility and there's none. Given the tone of the company, I've been upset the last week and in a state of panic. I generally like what I do there but I can't take more years of this commute and housing is astronomically high.

After that went out, I frantically started applying to places. I found a company where I'd be doing sort of a similar role. Even better is that they're 10-15 minutes down the road from where my condo is. I had a few interviews with this company and they offered me a role. I understand you have to factor in the cost of living but is it worth a 17% hit in salary? It's still ok money. Working for 16 years at the same company, I don't have much experience negotiating and afraid of leaving too much on the table, in exchange for my mental health.
Don't put anything ahead of your own mental health unless it will leave you destitute. And if that's the case, make a good plan, then leave.

When I moved to VT (long time ago though it was), I took a 50% pay cut. It was bumpy initially but eventually you adjust (I adjusted...and I've never wanted for anything). I made up some salary but was never going to reach the potential I'd have had if I stayed in CA. Living rural, in a quiet place, with little crime (at the time) was worth the pay cut.
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Old 12-20-2022, 04:52 PM
 
Location: on the wind
23,310 posts, read 18,852,325 times
Reputation: 75342
Quote:
Originally Posted by jvmillion83 View Post
After that went out, I frantically started applying to places. I found a company where I'd be doing sort of a similar role. Even better is that they're 10-15 minutes down the road from where my condo is. I had a few interviews with this company and they offered me a role. I understand you have to factor in the cost of living but is it worth a 17% hit in salary? It's still ok money. Working for 16 years at the same company, I don't have much experience negotiating and afraid of leaving too much on the table, in exchange for my mental health.
Are there any opportunities to advance or be promoted (salary-wise) at this potential company? You might end up replacing what you lost in salary over time. Would you be willing to invest the time? Investigating "around" the potential position a bit more might clarify things for you.

Last edited by Parnassia; 12-20-2022 at 05:37 PM..
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Old 12-20-2022, 05:03 PM
 
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,974,024 times
Reputation: 40635
So, yeah, mental health is paramount. For sure.

But why in all those years did you not move closer to work if you had to drive that far? Price in that other area? Didn't like the area?

Is the commute 90-120 round trip, or one way? If its the latter, I'd jump at the new position. If its the former, the math is trickier in my head. I also don't know what you'd have to give up lifestyle or savings wise to absord a 17% hit.
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Old 12-22-2022, 01:48 PM
 
5,724 posts, read 7,485,113 times
Reputation: 4523
Go for the new position. Peace is priceless. I took a huge hit when I moved out of state. I adjusted and when the opportunity presented itself I obtained a job I like making more money. It does not have to be forever. It is good for right now.
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