Hingham's not working for me anymore... (Beverly, Natick: buying, private school, live)

[495neighbor]

Originally Posted by Whatsnext75

Manchester by the sea is very Italian heavy. It is by the sea but a few people I've known from there reminded me of some of the folks on jersey shore. Needham is also very similar to hingham. Weston and Wellesley too.

That's funny. The one person I know from Manchester by the sea is very Jersey Shore.

[495neighbor]

Andover is very similar to OP's description of Hingham.

[Shrewsburried]

Originally Posted by 495neighbor

That's funny. The one person I know from Manchester by the sea is very Jersey Shore.

I find the whole northshore to have a bit of jersey/nouveau riche thing going on ... except towns like Essex, which prioritize wasp heritage over opulence.

[traffic_lover]

Originally Posted by 495neighbor

Andover is very similar to OP's description of Hingham.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh I was worried you'd say that!!!!

[Partial Observer]

Originally Posted by traffic_lover

Here we go with the SAHM bashing. Who would you rather use this board? Ex-heavy metal singers seeking poor drug infused slums with crumbling schools & gangs & bad pizza, worse than Lil caesars? Sheesh LOL

Actually, I was only referring to a very particular breed -- the ones that the OP described when she wrote this:

Originally Posted by hingham-x

They will never work outside the home again except as a volunteer, but will strut around with an exaggerated respect for their own high social position and evident wealth only seeking to associate with those above them socially, barely able to contain their dislike for people, activities, or possessions they regard as lower-class

I thought it was amusing that she basically described the group of people most likely to have both the time and inclination to be browsing these forums. And, yes, if you're going to force a binary choice between shooting the breeze on City-Data with...

(a) the Mercedes-driving, North-Face-and-Ugg-wearing soccer mom, or
(b) the failed musician looking for a place to gangbang and eat crappy pizza

... I'll pick the latter, if only for variety. Unfortunately, I haven't run into many "(b)" folks here. I imagine they're too busy working at the low-level service jobs that make it possible for "(a)" to spend her free time baking gluten-free cupcakes and debating school rankings in this forum.

Full disclosure: I actually moved to a town filled with "(a)'s" because, frankly, I want that shallow-yet-blissful existence for my own kids. We came like locusts, and apart from some token "socioeconomic diversity," we offer little in return. Exchanging pleasantries with those moms is pure torture because we have so little common ground, but I must admit that they make excellent role models. When my daughter comes home from a birthday party at a McMansion and wants to know why our house is only the size of their garage, I can just tell her that Mommy and Daddy made very bad life choices, and that she can break the cycle by making better ones. She won't find the blueprint for financial stability in our home, but we hope that some of it will trickle down to her via her more privileged classmates.

[sal1181]

Originally Posted by traffic_lover

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh I was worried you'd say that!!!!

Trust me when I say Andover is not like what the OP said about Hingham

[hingham-x]

Originally Posted by 495neighbor

Between these two homes, I like the layout of the Lincoln one better. The staircase of the Norwell one is very narrow and ends in a spiral. Not what I would pick for the home I was planning to retire and grow old in. My other concern is the open to second floor space if OP you plan to have small children as frequent visitors or if you are a pet owner.

Yes, the spiral staircase was definitely a concern in the Norwell house. We will be having elderly people there, visiting children, and dogs. The other issue is that although you can't tell from the listing, there is a massive house built right beside this one to the right. It's very odd and imposing when you are standing there. With six acres you would expect privacy but most of it is marsh.

The other issue is resale. We only need it for about 10 years. I was thinking it would be a good transitional house before a condo. But it's been on the market for a long time and it may be difficult to resell given the style. I love it but someone else may not.

Norwell is close to Hingham so I could still see my friends. And my last child is in a private school and would not have to change if we moved there. Less disruptive.

The other concern is no downtown area. You can do just about any errand in Hingham. Everything is right here. I like having a town center.

[pennyone]

[quote=hingham-x;42612502]

Originally Posted by Partial Observer

Careful - I think you just described a fair number of OPs who come to the Massachusetts forum looking for advice:

I hope I have helped someone - to find the place that they belong. You should embrace who you are and find your own place in the world. And if it's not working for you, keep looking.

Hingham is an awesome place is so many ways and most people who live here and embrace this lifestyle LOVE it. If they don't, the leave. You (in general, not PO), may be one of those people.

If you like sailing and boating, fine dining and excellent shopping, beautiful New England homes, proximity to the water, formal entertaining, great schools, unlimited activities for your kids, indoor exercise, sports galore including state championships in a number of them, an active historical society, fantastic library, great playgrounds, active Newcomer's and Mother's clubs, and unlimited opportunity to socialize and volunteer - Hingham is for you all the way!

Guys - You can expect amazing dining, a fantastic commute to Boston by boat or train complete with coffee, beer, and lots of opportunity for networking and reading the newspaper. You'll probably find a house within walking distance to your boat and if you don't have one yet you will. Maybe you'll share it. There are numerous landscape services here with very reasonable rates, and they do everything - gutters, screens, mulching - whatever you need. Trash pick-up, too. Handymen are readily available and affordable, everyone has at least two or three. There is a vibrant downtown you can take the kids for yogurt (not gelato, though). The women are all educated, beautiful, and well-dressed, like your wife, and they feel the love and support from others just like them that they need to survive your hectic travel schedule holding down the fort with the kids and the dog. With Fresh Market, Whole Foods, The Fruit Center, and Trader Joe's there will always be a tasty assortment of food in the fridge when you get home late. Your social calendar will be filled to capacity with invitations by friends, neighbors, potential employers, and guys who can support you in every way. Lots of scotch and cigars here, sports cars, too, and conservative values. And kids - you must love kids, all kids, not just your own.

Why am I on this forum? I'm looking for a new place to live. Because Hingham isn't doing it for me anymore.

For me personally, the competition and social strata has worn me down. I'm bored to death here. I no longer feel relaxed and happy so I think it's time for me to move on.

What interests me? Creating a capsule wardrobe, following Marie Kondo, streamlining my possessions, simplifying my life, learning a new skill, embracing technology, digging in the dirt, making compost, reading great books, finding meaning in life, in relationships, listening to and discussing NPR (National Public Radio), celebrating achievements, however small. I'm a liberal democrat. I'm interested in freedom, social justice, women's rights, rights of privacy, social change, the green movement, conservation, animal rights, discussing current events, finding purpose and meaning in life beyond myself. I like art and design and most of all beauty. I like to travel (but not to all-inclusive resorts at peak vacation times). Would I be welcome in your neighborhood?

Sounds like you need to move to Cambridge. It's a city, but what you're trying to escape from is in fact the unfortunate fundamentals for all these "good" towns with "great schools" and "community." You need to leave that materialistic crap completely and defect to the PRC where there are plenty of smart and truly educated people from all over the world. You might even meet some poor people too!

[alidmc]

Originally Posted by Shrewsburried

I find the whole northshore to have a bit of jersey/nouveau riche thing going on ... except towns like Essex, which prioritize wasp heritage over opulence.

Really, any towns specifically? I found the metro north area to be extremely nouveau riche in a Jersey shore type way, but the true North shore (Beverly, Manchester, Ipswich, Essex, Gloucester, etc.) to be pretty laid back. The people who live in these towns tend to be more focused on he land (and sea) around them than on showing off any wealth they have. Of course, you will always find pockets of these folk, its hard not to in Mass.
As for Manchester, the only people I know that live or are from there come from Europe, the polar opposite of Jersey shore! I go to Manchester frequently for my daughter's soccer games and often grab coffee in town (during the non-tourist season) and I have never encountered this. Maybe during beach season?

[Shrewsburried]

Originally Posted by alidmc

Really, any towns specifically? I found the metro north area to be extremely nouveau riche in a Jersey shore type way, but the true North shore (Beverly, Manchester, Ipswich, Essex, Gloucester, etc.) to be pretty laid back. The people who live in these towns tend to be more focused on he land (and sea) around them than on showing off any wealth they have. Of course, you will always find pockets of these folk, its hard not to in Mass.
As for Manchester, the only people I know that live or are from there come from Europe, the polar opposite of Jersey shore! I go to Manchester frequently for my daughter's soccer games and often grab coffee in town (during the non-tourist season) and I have never encountered this. Maybe during beach season?

The towns you mentioned are largely fine (hell, I'd live there if I financially and logistically could). I think it has more to do with the spill over from metro north, as you suggested ... places like Swampscott, Danvers, Lynnfield, etc.