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Please read as I really, really need advice. I've read other topics of UMB vs. UMASS Amherst and you guys seem helpful. Alright, here goes:
I'm a high school senior in the top tenth percentile of my class (18th place) and a 4.2 GPA in all AP/Honors classes. I got the Abigail Adams Scholarship which pays full tuition for any state school. I only applied to three colleges because of that reason: UMASS Dartmouth, UMASS Amherst and UMASS Boston. I live with my mom alone really close to Boston and she's working two jobs to make ends meet so that's why I'm riding on this scholarship and only applied to three state schools.
I got accepted into all three. UMB swallowed me right up and gave me their own Merit-based scholarship which pays for tuition & fees all 4 years, so of course I'll take that instead of the Abigail one. UMASS Amherst didn't give me any scholarship, but did give me $20,000 in financial aid and I plan on doing the work-study program they offer. I don't really care for UMASS Dartmouth, but applied anyway so I'm not considering it at all.
The conflict: My dream school is UMASS Amherst but my mom wants me to go into UMB because it's more local, cheap and won't have to pay for room & board because I can commute. I want to be a forensic pathologist and Amherst has Pre-Med which is the major I want and since UMB doesn't have that, I applied for Biology. Medical School doesn't really care for majors, as long as you took the prerequisite courses; it's just that Pre-Med prepares you for what they expect you to know.
I want to make friends and socialize and I keep reading that UMB is not the school for that since it's for commuters who are older (I read in their 30's?), but I also don't want all the crazy partying that comes with Amherst or disturbances during my studies. so UMB would be best for me there--but I still want to go to school with people around my age.
I want a lot of variety in my studies and excellence when it comes to faculty. I want accessible professors and classes that encourage discussion, where I will thrive. I read that Amherst has top-notch professors and so does UMB, but UMB is very limited as well. I read one review that professors are often not available and that's bad for me. Switching classes is apparently a hassle too and I know I'll change my mind about classes. Also, resources are apparently limited for such a modern university and science is extremely resource-heavy; the library is kind of run down and so are some of the buildings. Amherst is much more technologically updated and seems to have great resources.
I also read that UMB is bottom-tier uni and has a lot of college drop-outs. Other reviews say it's great, you'll get an excellent education at low costs. Amherst, which is obviously more varied, is obviously a "Make it what you will" uni, where you if you choose to focus on your studies, you'll find what you want. I fear the UMB will end up being just bad with occasionally one or two good classes and I will be unhappy. Also, I like being involved in school activities too like clubs and UMB is limited there as well whereas Amherst is great. At the same time, a bunch of my high school friends are going to private Boston colleges so I'd be able to hang out with them.
My mom is really not happy with the fact that I want to go to Amherst. I am kind of sheltered in that she does laundry, cooks, etc. I've had one job and it was a familly friend's business so I was already comfortable in that setting (not that I was bad worker!) so I don't have any real experience with unpleasant employers or work experience, period. Basically, I don't know how I'll do with dorm life. I might end up hating it and want to return home, but my mom says, bottom line:
"If you go to Amherst, you better not come crying to me that you want to come back because I will not accept it. You'll have to tough it out all 4 years."
She also says she won't pay for me to come home every weekend; I better stay there until week-long vacations pop up to come home. Basically, no support from my mother and if Amherst ends up not being my thing because of college life, I won't be able to change anything. Would I be able to tough it out until junior year when people are more mature/more settled? Should I take my chance with UMB? Will I get what I want when it comes to science?
Last edited by sexymustache; 04-07-2010 at 07:54 PM..
Go to UMass Amherst, it is the "real" college experience that you desire and that you have obviously earned based on your high school performance.
I am a Class of 1988 UMass Amherst alumni, a UMass Minuteman Marching Band alumni, I have worked as an alumni admissions counselor and recently participated in a networking event for undergrads at the Amherst campus.
If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to contact me directly via PM or if your Mom has any questions, feel free to point her my way.
Good luck with your decision and congratulations on your academic success to date.
Making return trips home from Amherst would be a non-issue, because scads of "Umies" do it on any given weekend. 'way 'way back in the '80s, one could start out their journey by thumb along Main St or Route 9 eastbound and be in somebody's car in a matter of minutes. I struck up a whole bunch of new acquaintances and even made a few friends that way. On other weekends, someone I already knew would be headed in that direction and I'd go along w/them to wherever their destination was. Sometimes finishing the trek by MBTA or commuter rail was part of the bargain - big deal. It was still cheaper and more fun than the Peter Pan bus, which btw now costs about fifty bucks one way. The ride-share board in the Student Union's main hallway has probably bitten the dust and gone virtual, but the concept remains the same and would still be a reliable fall-back. During one winter break, I scored a ride all the way to my parents' front door in Ohio - with a guy who hailed from the same town - thanks to that ride-share board. (We'd never met before due to age difference, but it turned out that our moms knew each other. LOL)
I'm harping on the subject of traveling to/from home right off the bat b/c I think it's imperative that you follow your heart and your gut about this hugely important decision. Your mother cannot, and should not, be calling the shots in this matter. But realize that she's acting as any loving mom would. There's probably been at least some drama in your household, particularly from middle school on, where she wished you were away from there and might've said so. Deep down, though, you'll be her child for as long as she lives. And every normal parent's sentiments involve wanting to stay physically nearby if not under the same roof. Her baby bird is potentially leaving the nest and flying beyond easy reach. That's a tough reality to face, particularly when you've been courted by a local school which would allow for your staying in her home and under her control. Incidentally, I think her telling you that you'd have to forget about visiting except over extended holidays - "tough it out for 4 years," you've made your bed now lie in it - is a bluff that you need to call. Bring up the fact that it's easy to travel to and fro on any given weekend at little or no expense. Contact the school or visit their Web site to find out when tours are scheduled (tours happen on a daily basis, pretty much.) They WANT parents to show up in person, ask questions, and see the campus for themselves. Your exact same situation plays out in hundreds of families each year, and the tours can help ease anxieties.
BTW, as huge as the student population at Amherst is, odds are very good that multiple schoolmates if not classmates of yours will be there. Not only is that a good bargaining chip in terms of the transpo thing, it commonly occurs that people who had little or nothing to do with each other (for whatever reason) in high school become closer as if by magic. I experienced this firsthand at the college I initially attended, and saw it unfold multiple times at UMass. ("You're coming home with ZEKE O'MALLEY on Friday??? The kid who gave you wedgies in seventh grade and stole Latoya Robinson from you in junior year?!") A fear shared by kid and parent alike is that a newbie on campus will be lost in the shuffle with nary a friend to be found and a roommate who can't be bothered. That's where same-school solidarity comes into play, but you'll undoubtedly learn that that's icing on the cake. For UMass is chock full of societal subsets, from special-interest halls in the dorms to organizations galore. You can even eat in a "dining commons" dedicated to "healthy" or kosher foods, and get into any one of them with your meal card. One of the beautiful things about college is that a little gregariousness goes a long way. Ask if a seat at a table is taken, and next thing you know you've met five cool new people.
Yes, I'm a Umie (who's now wondering who gf2020 is, since we were students during some of the same years!) But I can play devil's advocate for UMB also. Those who peg that school as "bottom tier" conveniently forget that the flagship campus also fares poorly in national rankings. (MA's state universities usually place around 45th out of 50 - I follow these things.) We simply don't have a public higher-ed system anywhere near the caliber of those in California, Wisconsin, etc, and the staggering quantity of private colleges in our state is to be "thanked" for that. Let that not discourage you, though, for the shopworn cliche is true: like life itself, college is what you make of it. Multizillionaire Jack Welch (former head honcho at GE), Natalie Cole, and thousands of others who've been "Minutepersons" can vouch for that. And that of course holds true for any of the UMass's. However, some of the perceived drawbacks of UMB are definitely real: little school spirit or sense of cohesion due to its being non-residential, a physical plant that's not in the best shape, and a decided lack of academic strength in some areas. You could hardly do better if you're drawn to public service, and indeed many of the school's departments are undeservedly underrated, but for depth and breadth of curriculum the Amherst campus wins hands down. My "hot button" about UMB is its being characterized as a place where dropouts go. The dropouts who are there are folks who've experienced life with only a high school diploma (or not even that) and who are now motivated to strive and move forward academically. So what if they're 47 instead of 19? There's still a healthy - and majority - representation of "traditional-aged" students there. Dating prospects may be a tad bit fewer as a consequence, but classroom discussions would be lively.
Now that I've allowed for equal time...I'll restate (for it can't be said enough) - follow YOUR heart and YOUR gut, not anyone else's. It's your life, m'friend. Best o' luck!
Go to UMASS Amherst. You'll meet hundreds of kids just like you. Away from home for the first time and figuring out how to be an adult. You obviously have a good head on your shoulders in order to have received all the scholarships.
Don't choose schools based on what your mom wants. She'll come around eventually.
Think about it this way. Ten years from now, looking back, you'll be glad you made the jump instead of the safe move.
I have nothing more to add to the above arguments. Amherst all the way. The experience of college isn't just sitting in a classroom and learning, it's living with new people and having the whole experience. If you go UMB, you'll likely look back over your shoulder again and again wondering what it would have been like at Amherst. You have the rest of your life to be a "commuter". NOW is the only time you get to be a full-fledged college student.
I vote for Umass Amherst!!! But yes, because YOU want it..that is who it will matter to after all.
RE: the partying... no one forces anyone to party...so don't. Socialize but don't go crazy. Do your studies and enjoy your youth while you have it. The education at Umass Amherst will be exactly what you are looking for moving toward medschool.
Congrats on a job well done in H.S. Awesome scholarship! Good for you.You deserve Umass Amherst and sound mature enough to make the right decisions. Mom will miss you, she is concerned for you, but she will pull thru okay you will see. It's your choice, but looking for support..I say Amherst.
A side question- what is "$20,000 in financial aid" from UMass-Amherst, and will it cover your needs? Often schools give more aid in the first year to reel you in, and then you'll pony up more money to stay at that school. Is your mother going to be contributing *any* money towards your college time? If so, and she's already working *two* jobs just to make ends meet, she should have something to say about that.
Obviously, you want to go to Amherst for the whole college deal. Obviously, UMass-Boston works much better financially, and you could certainly design an academic program that would work for you. You likely could cross-register with other colleges in the area, including the big guns.
Also, my rough understanding is that a "pre-med" course of study would include the same course types that you would take elsewhere. Biology, for instance, isn't going to be aimed precisely at what a doctor needs to know, it's biology. (I work with a lot of doctors from Harvard Medical School. Maybe I'm wrong, though).
You want to go to Amherst for the whole experience. If the finances equal out, that should be your choice. It would be a shame to end up with unspeakable debt (remember, after those four years, you might have to borrow a lot).
If you go to any state school and *shine*, you'll be more likely to get scholarships (not loans) and grants for a top-notch medical school.
It sounds like you've worked really hard and come to a successful next place in life. Consider not loading it up with huge debt for the first leg of the race. Best wishes.
A side question- what is "$20,000 in financial aid" from UMass-Amherst, and will it cover your needs? Often schools give more aid in the first year to reel you in, and then you'll pony up more money to stay at that school. Is your mother going to be contributing *any* money towards your college time? If so, and she's already working *two* jobs just to make ends meet, she should have something to say about that.
Obviously, you want to go to Amherst for the whole college deal. Obviously, UMass-Boston works much better financially, and you could certainly design an academic program that would work for you. You likely could cross-register with other colleges in the area, including the big guns.
Also, my rough understanding is that a "pre-med" course of study would include the same course types that you would take elsewhere. Biology, for instance, isn't going to be aimed precisely at what a doctor needs to know, it's biology. (I work with a lot of doctors from Harvard Medical School. Maybe I'm wrong, though).
You want to go to Amherst for the whole experience. If the finances equal out, that should be your choice. It would be a shame to end up with unspeakable debt (remember, after those four years, you might have to borrow a lot).
If you go to any state school and *shine*, you'll be more likely to get scholarships (not loans) and grants for a top-notch medical school.
It sounds like you've worked really hard and come to a successful next place in life. Consider not loading it up with huge debt for the first leg of the race. Best wishes.
Good advice! It will be a hard decision regarding finances. Otherwise...easily its Amherst!
Agreed (I'm a tenured university professor, BTW). Definitely go to UMass Amherst.
UMass Amherst is a better school than UMass Boston. You'll have a better experience in Amherst and you will probably not regret later going to the school of your choice. You are, however, more likey to resent going somewhere that you don't want to be.
This is a once-in-a-lifetime decision: go with the choice YOU want. Your mom will be upset, but she'll get over it. Part of her motivation (subconsciously, probably) is trepidation about of her baby going away from home. But leave you must -- this is part of the development process and is crucial for your own long term success.
Explain to mom that Amherst is the better place because it offers the study program that you need. Yes, it will cost more but it will pay dividends in the long and you are thinking about the LONG RUN (your lifetime) and nor just the next four years.
Keep in mind that mom will be proud that her little angel graduated from college and the college decision will eventually fade into the past. But the education and degree will be with you for a lifetime.
Go to UMass Amherst.
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Long inquiry begets lengthy response
The ride-share board in the Student Union's main hallway has probably bitten the dust and gone virtual, but the concept remains the same and would still be a reliable fall-back. During one winter break, I scored a ride all the way to my parents' front door in Ohio - with a guy who hailed from the same town - thanks to that ride-share board. (We'd never met before due to age difference, but it turned out that our moms knew each other. LOL)
But yes, because YOU want it..that is who it will matter to after all.
You deserve Umass Amherst and sound mature enough to make the right decisions. Mom will miss you, she is concerned for you, but she will pull thru okay you will see. It's your choice, but looking for support..I say Amherst.
