Maui Adjustment (safe, entertainment, water)

[Jungjohann]

I don't like Maui at all, haven't liked it for over 30 years, so, if you are somewhat hesitant, and believe all the stuff posted on this site, you may want to reconsider your move. In all my years here, I've just never seen it, the local versus haole nonsense. Heck, just move over, and have a MAJOR Luau, invite all your neighbors, get plenty beer, you'll be instant Ohana, as in family. I think that some of the people who post here, all negative about Hawaii, probably wouldn't fit in anywhere. And the earthquake, 6.7 on the OMG scale, still have a crack in the hollow tile wall because of it, what a way to wake up in the morning!!!!!!

Aloha

[JuliaHuff]

Calico, thanks for your post-it makes me feel better. I am not one of those people who sit and wait, I am very open and friendly, and it is usually very easy for me to make friends. So I really hope I will meet some people on Maui
What neighborhood are you at? I am starting to think that maybe we should move to another area. Right now we are in Wailuku, it is very quiet, and my husband did not even see any of the neighbors. I don’t know if it is appropriate for him to just walk to their houses and introduce himself.

Cymkolanhoe—I don’t think it will be easier for us with other mainlanders, because we have the same experience. We really don’t, because we are not Americans. So it is really not the case, we have nothing in common with people from California, for example. That’s why we were excited about Hawaii, because we felt it was not exactly like the rest of the US, and we felt that local hawaian culture is closer to Russian culture. We also take our shoes off when we enter the house, and we are from Asia
We are not afraid of earthquakes, grew up in the mountains, and had plenty of them. I don’t think it is a big deal on Maui, there are no high-rise buildings, and you can always run outside. Try earthquakes when you live on the 9th floor, that’s not fun.

I guess it is scary, because everybody keeps saying that most people go back in the first 2 years, and then you look on craigslist, and there are ads where people are selling all their stuff, for nothing, and moving away. My husband bought a bed from a woman who was moving to Minnesota with her boyfriend. This makes you wonder-why do people leave? And makes you freak out
We had a very positive attitude toward going to Maui-when we visited it, we absolutely loved it. But then we found out about this quarantine situation, and all the other stuff that people write here, and we freaked.

[MadRussian]

Originally Posted by JuliaHuff

This makes you wonder-why do people leave?

Because whole LOT of people with huge baggage of emotional and mental problems moves there with hope to find PARADISE up there. You can see bunch of such people on this forum, just read messages, and think!
... and then they find themselves on tiny island on middle of HUGE ocean, with whole LOT of old and NEW problems!
One more time - paradise NOT located on this planet. Nope. Nada.
So if you come with expectation to find paradise – wrong address. It’s not there.
If you come with expectation find place to live, enjoy great nature, and work hard to achieve something in your live – you’ll be home.
Anyway, it’s way better then stinky, noisy, full of very “warm, caring, and friendly” newyorkers New York.

IMHO: NOBODY and NOTHING makes you happy, it’s inside you, and you just have to find it.

[JuliaHuff]

MadRussian, most normal people need close friends to be happy. if you can be happy on your own-i envy you!
New York may be stinky and noisy, but it is also a home to a huge russian community. it is practically like being at home-i can go to church, i have russian friends that i can speak russian to. My mom has her russian friends here. We celebrate russian religious and other holidays together. I dont feel lonely or homesick, and i have tons of friends.
And I do remember the time when we just moved to NY and did not know anyone, we VERY lonely. I moved 3 times, and each time it was lonely in the beggining, and it is not a good feeling. New York was easy, because of the russian community, you make friends in one day, and then you meet their friends and relatives, etc.

And by the way-New Yorkers are pretty warm and friendly people. We always meet new people, when we eat in restaurants, in the stores, even with the post office workers and local business owners. and very accepting of other cultures, and they always want to meet new people and lear something new.
People at my work are very nice too-they are from all over the world, and we socialize after work a lot. The same was at my husband's hospital-all kinds of different backgrounds and cultures, but they spent a lot of time together outside of work. he had indian, spanish, european, american-all kinds od friends at work. They hung out together so much, i was upset at him for not spending enough time with me!

[JoeyT]

Calico Salsa, thank you for those informative articles. Very eye-opening. I HATE easrthquakes!!!!

[MadRussian]

Originally Posted by JuliaHuff

MadRussian, most normal people need close friends to be happy. if you can be happy on your own-i envy you!

Happy people attract other people, and sad and lonely pushes them away.

[Calico Salsa]

Julia,
We're down in Kihei. I wouldn't say that Kihei is more friendly than Wailuku overall. It depends on the neighborhood and of course on how you live in it.

I can't emphasize enough how important it is for you (not you Julia, but you in the general way) to be willing to take the first steps. I started by waving at everyone, and saying hello. Like any place, most people work all day and come home in the evenings or are around on the weekends. I was doing a lot of home improvements during my first months, plus landscaping & yardwork. I tried to schedule deliveries and concrete trucks during a reasonable hour, but one day the only time we could get concrete was 7am. I put a note in every mailbox to warn and apologize, giving my phone number. I didn't know everyone then, but later I heard the consideration was much appreciated.

When I was going back & forth to CA for a while, my neighbors mowed my yard. I was so grateful, and brought them things back from CA. My other neighbors are constantly looking out for me and sharing what they have. If you initiate the warmth, you'll certainly get it back.

Really, anyone can start with waving, even if you feel ridiculous for a while. But a smile and a wave can go a long way, and pretty soon you'll be barbequing together.

Wailuku has diverse neighborhoods. I have friends there, and some of the areas are like any bedroom community - people come home and go inside. Others you can see kids toys all over, and on the weekends people are out chatting with each other.

Julia has a good idea of checking out other areas. You can start off in one place, then as you get to know the island you can decide where you really want to live. Kihei is hotter and has more tourists than Wailuku. Beaches are closer. Wailuku is moister, nearer the government, has some industrial and is closer to the big box stores in Kahului. Kihei has a rep for being hot and also for being more rowdy. Wailuku has more 'old town' buildings, then newer developments, and Wailuku Heights, up on the hillside where you can see a lot of Maui stretched out beneath you.

Freaking out is natural. This is a big change. MadRussian is right when s/he posted that a lot of people move here with some dream in their eyes, without a realistic look at what island living is like.

Checking Craig's List is not a good way to judge an area. People move in/out of Hawaii a lot also because of the military and youth growing up and moving off to school off island. Definitely people move here and away more than some other areas of the country because they don't like it, but that might also be true for another place that is such a vastly different feel than where they might have come from before.

I can't guarantee Maui is going to be a place everyone will enjoy, but I can say I love it and that it has a lot of warm, friendly, caring people.

[hotzcatz]

Originally Posted by cynmkolohe

I might agree with hotzcatz more here if there were a few qualifiers thrown in...

It can sometimes be easier to get to know some other mainlanders or newcomers because you will have the common experience of having moved here to connect you right away.

There are some local folks who might take longer to warm up to you if you are new, because they have had a lifetime of seeing people come and go. Even then, that doesn't mean that they will be rude or unkind. Maybe just more reserved with personal information or in opening up early on...

There are some newcomers or visitors who can be rather off-putting by their outspoken judgments of an environment that they are not familiar with...and that can sometimes be rather annoying, especially when they are reinforcing the stereotype of the uppity tourist...

Generally, if questions are asked with good-natured humility and a smile, you will find plenty of people who will be happy to answer--sometimes with way more detail than you might even want!

Julia, you may or may not choose to make Maui your home for life...but for however long you choose to stay, it is highly likely that you will find many reasons to enjoy Maui. I wish you all the best in your decisions and hope you and your husband get settled into some happy routines.

Thanks for adding the modifiers, CynmKolohe! Sometimes one can seem to be rather decisive in writing when the tone of voice doesn't go through. We will see how it all goes and I'll go dig up a rose colored monitor screen somewhere. A hui hou!

[manoagirl]

Originally Posted by hotzcatz

Thanks for adding the modifiers, CynmKolohe! Sometimes one can seem to be rather decisive in writing when the tone of voice doesn't go through. We will see how it all goes and I'll go dig up a rose colored monitor screen somewhere. A hui hou!

I wonder if that is a local style of witting "Decisive writing" and being direct and to the point. I mean I can usually tell right away by a persons writing style if that person is local or from the mainland. Tone and diction is not really stressed in many of the English classes taught on the Island. So I can understand where hotzcatz is coming from.

[JuliaHuff]

Calico, thank you very much!
I am very friendly, so I don’t have a problem with making the first steps, I really appreciate your help!
Funny thing-my husband did not know about geckos, he found one in our back yard and threw it away, and he thought they were bad. Now we have to find geckos!
Hopefully there are more in the back yard.