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Ive been taking an antidepressant for a year and a half now Bupropion, and my doctor said that I have chronic unspecified depression, at the time I was dealing with alot of depression symptoms but now I dont think I have depression anymore.
Im going to be honest most of the time I don't know what Im feeling if you would ask me how was feeling, I would say fine, but other times I feel like that I cant explain what Im feeling. Its like most of the time I feel like Im just here, just nothing, just existing. A lot of people think that Im just a happy person because I have a nice smile but Im not really that happy, in the inside most of the time Im just "here" living but not alive type of feeling & attitude.
I dont know what it is something else, the medication not effective anymore, or my ADHD Inattentive type!
Overall I do have low self esteem confidence and body image issues but at times I look in the mirror and I see myself kind of attractive and then other times I can barely look at myself in the mirror and not really feel good about myself and have negative energy/thoughts. Sometimes to this day I have thoughts on Why did God give me this life? Why am I alive? Why cant I have another persons life? Why was I even born? I have these thoughts time to time.
I think its normal for a person to have those thoughts once or twice in their life time but those questions above in my head go off and on.
TySky..what do you do to keep busy in your life?..maybe you need to find something that you can do that would make you realize that it's good you were born, and it's good you're alive..Maybe you're bored..I love taking a meal to someone less fortunate..and some bones for the dog. Help an older person with some chores. Watch the children play in the park, and revel in their innocence...There's lots of things you can do that others would really appreciate you for...visit someone who's all alone, and let them know you care...good luck Ty..believe that you are worthy, and get busy living and loving your life.
TySky..everyone has moments of indecision and unease in their lives...you sound like you're really into "behaviors". Why not get some psychology books and check them out. Great reading, and you might see something in them you can relate to..maybe something that could help you understand why you feel the way you do.
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