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Thanks for your information...I hope this thread does encourage at the very least for those who do suffer, to know they are not alone and that it is nothing to be ashamed of ...thank you for posting!
Sadly some of us will not marry, go swimming, enjoy life to the fullest cause we are scared someone will find out..is that such a bad thing? Is it really? We are dealing with alot of stress, alot of pain and what is that to be ashamed of? If those around us truly love us, they will not judge us or belittle us...I know when I was young, I was made fun of by my own family members and classmates..i felt like a freak of nature and they were rather cruel bout it too, but they were also cruel about OTHER things as well here...i was told to just stop it, promised things as if i had control over it and wanted to embrass them or something, It was always me who was the bad person cause I had a disorder no one knew bout..it left me ugly and feeling worthless but so did alot of things too, like being abused and then abused at school, no where to hide in life, no one but in my own thoughts.
i have come to alot of sad conclusions bout people in general...I seen that most were shallow and followers and when your down, most will kick you to the curb, I learned early on that most people could not be trusted...I have met some remarkable people in my lifetime who also were abused, they overcame and did wonderful things for people, they are my inspirations....the experience made me very senstiive and very wounded and when I get attacked for being overly senstiive I know now where that is coming from, its coming from a rather dark place in people...yes i have learned alot lately too.
I think distractions are also good for those who hurt themselves or pull their hair, we can only do so much theraphy in a day, you know? So I think trying to do something good for yourself is highly underated, most of us do nice things for others, alot, but how many of us do something for us? Not many, in my expeiences, if you have this disorder, buy yourself a beautiful silk scarf, some pretty earrings...get a makeover, love you for you and who you are, not what you think soceity wants you to be or to look...look within yourself..peace to all who pull their hair, your not alone.
I used to pull out my hair when I was 12-13 years old, and I eventually stopped when I discovered something that was easier to conceal: cutting. My parents, rather than trying to figure out WHY I was pulling out my hair, yelled at me for it and punished me.
I was sexually assaulted as a child and they didn't find out about it until I told them many years later. The signs were all there for them to see; they just didn't read them. So...parents...if your kids are pulling out their hair or cutting themselves, don't ignore it like my parents did. It took years of expensive therapy (on my own dime) to fix me. I'm fine now, but I think my recovery was much tougher than it had to be because I didn't get help at the time, when I needed it most.
I had a close friend that use to cut herself. She said she did it to feel pain----or just to feel period! She had a terrible childhood and was also sexually assaulted. She said she had stopped "feeling". So she started "cutting" to feel. How sad is that??
I think getting help and being able to get it out of your body is sooo important and that we truly can't move on till have done the emotional throw up so to speak here, and how long we remain in therpahy is really a very personal choice and it varies from person to person...and when the time is right to move on and learning to deal with it, comes with time, not anyones clock but our own..I will never judge anyone for getting theraphy or how long they must go to recover, i know how it feels when someone tells me to just get over it, or just stop hurting yourself, its an easy cowardly tactic that people use on us, oh just move on or just get over it, it is very abusive imho....I sorry you got that response...I hope you have talked to someone to deal with things here too, it is like a weight lifted off your shoulders when you do in my most humble opinion! thank you for posting and peace to you
I am glad you did get help, is sad that we have to fix things on our own dime for things that were done to us, huhn?
I had a close friend that use to cut herself. She said she did it to feel pain----or just to feel period! She had a terrible childhood and was also sexually assaulted. She said she had stopped "feeling". So she started "cutting" to feel. How sad is that??
It's tragic. Cutters are at a pretty high risk for suicide, but there are several reasons why someone might cut. If they cut on a body part that is visible with normal clothing (on their forearms, for example), they want you to see it. They either want help or want attention but aren't ready to be helped. Usually, cutters cut where you can't see it. They may do it to "feel" pain, because sometimes feeling pain is better than not feeling anything at all; or they may do it to externalize the internal pain that they're feeling.
My brother used to cut and my mom used to get mad at him and said he did for attention and selfish reasons..now i see it was her not liking the effects of the abuse she had caused on him, she did what many abusers do, they take their shame and throw it onto their victim...he then later tried to kill himself several times thereafter..he was forecd to kill animals for money and then afterwards sexually assaulted....theyare the ONES WHO DID THIS TO HIM!
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