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Chilali beat me to the comparative shooting abilities of good versus bad guys.
Also, the average revolver will hold about 12 rounds, any automatic with any size clip will generally hold about 20 rounds.
Good guys can always change clips, or replace a "speed loader cylinder" in 1/10th the time that anyone else can.
Hot wiring any car, even new ones with factory security systems, takes about 3 seconds.
Cell phones NEVER drop calls, unless it's a woman or child in danger.
Wiring money takes milliseconds, even without prior coordination with both banks.
Security cameras ALWAYS get perfect pictures of suspects, unlike on TV (Law and Order, CSI, etc) where they are always pointing the wrong way, grainy or out of focus.
The CIA is the smoothest running, error-free organization on the face of the earth. Although KGB/U.N.C.L.E./Smersh are pretty good too!
No matter how steep the dive, how fast the flat spin, how broken all flight controls are, ANY air disaster can be averted by a really good (Academy Award nominated) pilot.
I've learned that if you wear glasses in the movie and lose them, you instantly become totally blind and stumble around waving your arms in front of you like a zombie looking for his next lunch even if your lenses were about 2mm thick. That always bugs me. Plus no glasses- or contact lens-wearing people ever survive the apocalypse.
Also, bad guys can't shoot straight but the hero is apparently a super marksman and getting hit by a bullet requires you to hurl yourself backwards thro a plate glass window smashing it into smithereens
I also noticed the glasses thing (per Scooby-Doo)
Field of Dreams - there is never a line at the concession stand at Fenway Park!
Die Hard(s) - taught me the beat cops know more than FBI agents and can drive any vehicle like a pro
All "dictators" have beards and are of Latin descent
Terminator Salvation: all humans have the innate ability to hot-wire vehicles and said vehicles have fully charged batteries , fully inflated tires, and full gas tanks even though the vehicles have been sitting abandoned for years!
All rednecks, racists and ignorant people have a southern accent.
All New Yorkers are loud, obnoxious and say "fugedabotit".
All city people are in a hurry.
All city people eat in delis or eat Chinese take-out.
All city people have forgotten what's important.
All city people are shallow.
All city people are on drugs.
All city people live in ghettos.
All city people live in penthouses.
All city people who work minimum-wage jobs live in penthouses.
All city people are stylish and hip.
All city people are slashers.
All country people are slashers.
All country people are rubes.
All country people are ignorant.
All country people have a horrible hidden secret.
All country people are inbred.
All country people want you to squeal like a pig.
All country people can play a banjo.
All country people are salt-of-the-earth.
All country people know what the weather is going to do.
All country people know what's important.
All country people have great wisdom and insight into the human psyche.
All old "ethnic" people have visions and wisdom beyond all knowing.
The only black guy or the guy wearing the red uniform shirt dies first.
The guy with only 2 weeks left on his tour and the pregnant wife dies.
All hookers have hearts of gold.
Guns never have to be reloaded.
Guns muzzle flashes and sound don't have to be synched.
You CAN fire a Ma Deuce from the hip.
Soldiers can get shot multiple times and be just fine.
It can be quiet. Too quiet.
All car tires squeal while "peeling out" on dirt roads.
All heroes are good looking.
All bad guys are either ugly or have disfiguring scars.
Cowboys are named Red or Hank.
Cowboys have sidekicks who are loyal, make funny faces and aren't as good looking.
Cowboys hate Indians.
Indians hate Cowboys.
Cowboys really like Indians.
Indians really like Cowboys.
Cowboys really like Cowboys.
Sheepherders who really like sheepherders are cowboys.
Almost all cops (but one) are thugs.
Almost all cops (but one) are crooked.
For it to be true romance, there must have been a huge misunderstanding brought about by ridiculous circumstances leading to a breakup followed by much moping and a realization that one cannot live without the other leading to a joyful yet whimsical reunion.
There is always a happy ending.
That your starship can be traveling at warp speeds, as well as your fellow combatant's ship; yet you can effectively use weapons that only travel at light speed to destroy your enemy and you don't "run into" your own energy weapon's fire.
This battle scenario often took place in the original Star Trek series.
I've learned that the loud obnoxious sex-crazed guy always gets it first in horror movies & the virgin always survives. That's so unlikely, how many virgins are out there??
I've also learned that if your friend goes for the guy you like, there will be a period where you'll be mad but then you'll end up dumping the guy & forgiving your friend. Highly unlikely, we all know the girl stays w/the guy & never sees her friend again.
And last but not least, I've learned that no matter how many times you kill someone, they will always come back to life. Thus, the need to chop up the body into teeny bits, separate the bits, douse the bits w/gasoline & start on fire. Then, separate the ashes & bury them, preferably in toxic soil.
All rednecks, racists and ignorant people have a southern accent.
All New Yorkers are loud, obnoxious and say "fugedabotit".
All city people are in a hurry.
All city people eat in delis or eat Chinese take-out.
All city people have forgotten what's important.
All city people are shallow.
All city people are on drugs.
All city people live in ghettos.
All city people live in penthouses.
All city people who work minimum-wage jobs live in penthouses.
All city people are stylish and hip.
All city people are slashers.
All country people are slashers.
All country people are rubes.
All country people are ignorant.
All country people have a horrible hidden secret.
All country people are inbred.
All country people want you to squeal like a pig.
All country people can play a banjo.
All country people are salt-of-the-earth.
All country people know what the weather is going to do.
All country people know what's important.
All country people have great wisdom and insight into the human psyche.
All old "ethnic" people have visions and wisdom beyond all knowing.
The only black guy or the guy wearing the red uniform shirt dies first.
The guy with only 2 weeks left on his tour and the pregnant wife dies.
All hookers have hearts of gold.
Guns never have to be reloaded.
Guns muzzle flashes and sound don't have to be synched.
You CAN fire a Ma Deuce from the hip.
Soldiers can get shot multiple times and be just fine.
It can be quiet. Too quiet.
All car tires squeal while "peeling out" on dirt roads.
All heroes are good looking.
All bad guys are either ugly or have disfiguring scars.
Cowboys are named Red or Hank.
Cowboys have sidekicks who are loyal, make funny faces and aren't as good looking.
Cowboys hate Indians.
Indians hate Cowboys.
Cowboys really like Indians.
Indians really like Cowboys.
Cowboys really like Cowboys.
Sheepherders who really like sheepherders are cowboys.
Almost all cops (but one) are thugs.
Almost all cops (but one) are crooked.
For it to be true romance, there must have been a huge understanding brought about by ridiculous circumstances leading to a breakup followed by much moping and a realization that one cannot live without the other leading to a joyful yet whimsical reunion.
There is always a happy ending.
Wow, that's a good list!
I also have realized that you hear the gunshot before the bullet hits the window, car, or you. (from too many movies to mention)
The Giant Claw(1957): wherever our hero/monster is - the monster/hero is always there with them! - and pictures of clouds work great for "Earth Curvature Calibration" work.
50's Sci-fi showed that we can jump light-years ahead in scientific advances to defeat the aliens/monsters in the nick of time.
Scientists can type at 120 wpm and never make typos
All Christmas stories take place in the snow belt and it always snows (gently) on Christmas Eve.
Private investigators lead incredibly exciting lives, and are reluctant to take on any more cases.
Never, EVER investigate a strange noise in your attic, basement, closet, etc. armed with only a lit candle. Especially if you're female.
Automobiles can withstand more punishment than can be imagined, and still travel at 80 miles per hour.
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