Good middle school for my quirky daughter? (Salem, Dover: house prices, theater)

[ChampagneMolecule]

My husband is going to be working out of Portsmouth, and we’re trying to figure out where to plant our feet! We have two daughters, ages 9 and 11. The eldest enjoys science, reading, fiber art, legos, and piano. The younger enjoys reading, drawing, music (voice and piano), and theater. Our younger kid is very outgoing and will thrive anywhere, but we want to make sure to put our eldest into the right environment. We’re looking for a diverse, welcoming school that has something to offer a quirky kid. While we want our kids to have access to quality teachers and a variety of classes that will prepare them college (if that’s the road they choose), but what’s most important to us is that they are in an environment where the teachers are inspired and don’t expect all the kids to fit a certain mold. Our quirky daughter tests well-above grade level, but needs support socially and emotionally. So far, Portsmouth Middle School looks like a good option. I’d love to hear experiences with that school and others in the area. We’re planning to explore towns and schools between Salem, MA and Portsmouth, NH later next month. Thanks all for your time!

[thebig0]

Going to depend on your budget and how long you are willing to drive to amenities/shopping. Also whether you are comfortable with well, septic and local heat - no nat gas.

Best school district is oyster river, which includes Durham, Marbury and lee. The house prices and property taxes reflect the quality of education. There is a grocery and hardware store in lee, you would be driving 15 +/- minutes to portsmouth for anything else. To my knowledge all are well/septic with the exception of immediate downtown Durham. Durham is home to uhh, roughly 15000 college students largely in Durham along with Dover and Newmarket to a lesser extent.

Next best district is Exeter which includes: exeter, Brentwood, newfields, east Kingston, Stratham and Kensington. Again extremely expensive. The area is large and diverse geographically, Exeter has most amenities.

Portsmouth district is considered average, it includes rye, Newington, Portsmouth, Greenland and new castle.

Avoid Dover and Newmarket.

Do not consider Massachusetts, there is no advantage and you would be subject to 6% income tax

Edit - forgot to mention the towns are small, all middle/high schools are cooperative, fed by all all towns in the district

[bigbear99]

Remember that parental income levels and school "quality" go hand in hand, at least as measured by test scores. Remember too that no one among ed researchers knows how to make a "good" school. They have a hard time even defining it.

Finally, these "best" school districts are usually hyper-competitive, and places where "lesser" kids get lost. Sounds like you already understand this, so one thing you might look at is the support a school offers (or doesn't.) Do they have one counselor for each 500 students, or more? Do they have other support programs. You should talk to school leadership, but watch out for pablum answers like "we meet the individual needs of every one of our students." Ask for examples, and good luck.

[jdhpa]

I don't have any experience with Portsmouth middle school, but I did want to offer a couple of alternatives in case one of them is a good match for you.

There are private schools called 1:1 schools. I.e., they're physical schools that students attend, but all instruction is tutored. The good points are the teachers will know exactly how well your child is learning and can set the pace accordingly, either faster or slower. Another thing is that, since they're getting individual instruction, they don't have to sit in each class 5 hours per week. Usually class time is ~15 hours per week, so it's much more time efficient and less overwhelming. The big downside of course is it's fairly expensive.

The other alternative is online schools. I've found these to be less expensive than typical private schools, and more accommodating to individual student needs than public schools. However, it does require that your child have the type of personality where they'll do their homework without constant oversight from a parent, or it will be a constant grudge match with them. It's also more work for the parents to keep up with what's going on in class, helping with homework, etc. Less than home schooling, but more than typical. Also, it will be up to the parents to drive anything you want to do that's not the 'standard flow.' The schools won't interfere, but they won't initiate anything, either. These also are typically about 15 hours per week of class time.

With either option, there isn't a lot of opportunity for socializing, so you would need to arrange extracurricular activities for that. This is very important for them not to feel isolated, which can easily happen if they don't have regular contact with other kids their age through school. The good thing though is that since they're only in class ~15 hours per week, there's more opportunity for extracurricular activities.

I hope whatever you decide to do works out well for you . Congratulations on moving to Portsmouth, I'm sure you'll love it!

[CrankYankee]

An observation -- all middle schools in the area are not cooperative. And I'm not sure why Dover and Newmarket were specifically noted as bad choices. They are both solid public school options with perhaps a wider socioeconomic array represented in the school population than either Exeter or Oyster River. (In my opinion, that is not necessarily a bad thing.)
Another thing you might want to consider is the size of school. A smaller, more community-oriented school may not have all the bells and whistles of the larger schools mentioned, but children (quirky or not) may be less likely to "fall through the cracks." You might want to visit some local schools to get a better sense of their culture--something that is hard to quantify in data points.

[unit731]

It is not the schools.

It is the parent involvement in their child's education and parents involvement in and at the schools.
Very important to make a visit with each of the child's teachers. Leave your cell phone number with each teacher and ask that they call you if any potential issues arise or suggestions for child's involvement and enhancement.

Go to some of the school board meetings.

It is the child's desire to learn and advance. It is the child's responsibility to converse with parent on a daily basis about school activities. It is the child's responsibility to get involved in school activities whether it is sports, clubs, music, or any school or after school programs.

If the child just wishes to pass and to watch TV - then the parent has to take actions to get the child involved.

Meet with the school nurse and any guidance counselors. Get involved.

[miu]

Originally Posted by unit731

It is not the schools.

It is the parent involvement in their child's education and parents involvement in and at the schools.

Get involved.

And I wanted to add, that if a child is "quirky", then it's very important for the parents to be involved with the education of their child... no matter how good the school is or how gifted the other students are. Parents need to help keep their child focused in their studies and help with long term academic or career goals. Having good teachers are not enough, especially since they have so many students to keep track of.