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Five years ago I left NJ searching for a better quality of life for myself and my son. Here we are now in Richmond, Virginia, living in a beautiful two-bedroom apartment complete with a washer and dryer, dishwasher, central air, two bathrooms, sliding glass doors leading out to a private patio. Just steps outside our door is a nature trail. There's the huge, sparkling clean pool, tennis court and a fitness room with sauna and hot tub.
My son plays outside after school in the big, grassy play area with all the other kids. People walk their dogs (yes, we're allowed to have pets).
All this for $900 a month.
This is why people come to places like Richmond, Raleigh and Charlotte.
Yet, I'm miserable and not a day goes by that I don't miss NJ.
I fear now though that I've become a slave to this lifestyle and I don't know if I could go back to lugging laundry baskets out to the laundromat and sweating through the summer with a portable air conditioner and no pool.
I wish we'd never left NJ but going back is a scary proposition, not to mention expensive. I don't know how I ever afforded to live there....I guess you just do what you have to do when you don't know any different.
I just know that I can't spend my life here in Richmond.
I wonder if anyone else has faced this dilemma and whether you decided to stay or go back. Is it worth it to have a better quality of life if all the things you love and miss about NJ haunt you every day?
Five years ago I left NJ searching for a better quality of life for myself and my son. Here we are now in Richmond, Virginia, living in a beautiful two-bedroom apartment complete with a washer and dryer, dishwasher, central air, two bathrooms, sliding glass doors leading out to a private patio. Just steps outside our door is a nature trail. There's the huge, sparkling clean pool, tennis court and a fitness room with sauna and hot tub.
My son plays outside after school in the big, grassy play area with all the other kids. People walk their dogs (yes, we're allowed to have pets).
All this for $900 a month.
This is why people come to places like Richmond, Raleigh and Charlotte.
Yet, I'm miserable and not a day goes by that I don't miss NJ.
I fear now though that I've become a slave to this lifestyle and I don't know if I could go back to lugging laundry baskets out to the laundromat and sweating through the summer with a portable air conditioner and no pool.
I wish we'd never left NJ but going back is a scary proposition, not to mention expensive. I don't know how I ever afforded to live there....I guess you just do what you have to do when you don't know any different.
I just know that I can't spend my life here in Richmond.
I wonder if anyone else has faced this dilemma and whether you decided to stay or go back. Is it worth it to have a better quality of life if all the things you love and miss about NJ haunt you every day?
obviously, only you can answer this. i maintain life is too short to be miserable, whether you are in Richmond, Timbuktu or NJ.
I'll just leave you with this (your bolded part): isn't a huge part of "quality of life" being happy where you actually *live*?
Absolutely, lived in Charlotte for 6 years, moved back to NJ in 1998. But I was in my 20s and got work experience that helped me back North. I will never willingly leave Moorestown. For me it was just a general awareness that everything was lower quality - food, people, culture, media, incomes, even crime is higher per capita in Charlotte than 95% of NJ. Weather was better if you like hot sun but the novelty of the south wore off after a few years. The change was nice at first but then I realized it wasn't for me and I'm glad I came back.
People do it for lower living expenses and generally better economic growth. So it is a situation of give and take.
what is it that you miss about nj and why would you move back in a heartbeat?..i can understand if its family but i read alot on these posts people miss the food and the pizza. i dont know im big on quality of life myself and i dont think fast food and restaurants have anything to do with quality of life...if it wasnt for my dad i would be gone.. we are looking towards the mountians of north carolina..
what is it that you miss about nj and why would you move back in a heartbeat?..i can understand if its family but i read alot on these posts people miss the food and the pizza. i dont know im big on quality of life myself and i dont think fast food and restaurants have anything to do with quality of life...if it wasnt for my dad i would be gone.. we are looking towards the mountians of north carolina..
but really, does it matter why? if she's miserable, she's miserable, and where's the quality of life then?
Five years ago I left NJ searching for a better quality of life for myself and my son. Here we are now in Richmond, Virginia, living in a beautiful two-bedroom apartment complete with a washer and dryer, dishwasher, central air, two bathrooms, sliding glass doors leading out to a private patio. Just steps outside our door is a nature trail. There's the huge, sparkling clean pool, tennis court and a fitness room with sauna and hot tub.
My son plays outside after school in the big, grassy play area with all the other kids. People walk their dogs (yes, we're allowed to have pets).
All this for $900 a month.
This is why people come to places like Richmond, Raleigh and Charlotte.
Yet, I'm miserable and not a day goes by that I don't miss NJ.
I fear now though that I've become a slave to this lifestyle and I don't know if I could go back to lugging laundry baskets out to the laundromat and sweating through the summer with a portable air conditioner and no pool.
I wish we'd never left NJ but going back is a scary proposition, not to mention expensive. I don't know how I ever afforded to live there....I guess you just do what you have to do when you don't know any different.
I just know that I can't spend my life here in Richmond.
I wonder if anyone else has faced this dilemma and whether you decided to stay or go back. Is it worth it to have a better quality of life if all the things you love and miss about NJ haunt you every day?
Hey! Get outta my head!
I'm originally from Brooklyn, NY and now I live in Northern VA. Overall, the quality of life is MUCH better where I live now (no rats, pissy elevators or (outright) illegal activity), but I miss Brooklyn to pieces!! There truly is no other place like it on earth. I've already resolved that I can't go back to live there because it would feel like going backward in my life (I'm not into do-overs), so now I'm contemplating a move to NJ. Close enough, right?
Funny because I've contemplated Brooklyn thinking it would be close enough to NJ. I think Brooklyn might actually be cheaper than New Jersey...at least you don't need a car to live there.
I hear you about going backwards but I'm looking at it as I tried something and it didn't work. And, in going back, all the things I thought I hated about New Jersey now don't seem so bad. (except the cost). I don't think I'd mind the traffic jams and long lines at the grocery store just to feel alive again.
Also to deb8997....of course I miss the food. I'd give you a hundred dollars right now for a Taylor ham and swiss on a hard roll. But it really goes much deeper than the food. There's something about the whole culture of NJ that no other place can duplicate.
I'm originally from Brooklyn, NY and now I live in Northern VA. Overall, the quality of life is MUCH better where I live now (no rats, pissy elevators or (outright) illegal activity), but I miss Brooklyn to pieces!! There truly is no other place like it on earth. I've already resolved that I can't go back to live there because it would feel like going backward in my life (I'm not into do-overs), so now I'm contemplating a move to NJ. Close enough, right?
Try your hardest to get accustomed to your new home. No one should be subjected to those conditions, especially if they can afford to escape it!
There's something about the whole culture of NJ that no other place can duplicate.
That's EXACTLY how I feel about Brooklyn. Have you thought about a different section of Jersey? That way you'll be "home" without being "home."
I hear ya, Busch Boy. I never lived in the projects (pissy elevators), but I spent a lot of time there visiting people. I wasn't afraid of going there because everyone knew me. As strange as it sounds, there is honor among thugs . They would actually look out for me and my friends, and alert us to any danger in the area.
Since I've been gone from the area so long (over 7 years), now I wouldn't go in a project building on a dare!!!
Yet, I'm miserable and not a day goes by that I don't miss NJ. Is it worth it to have a better quality of life if all the things you love and miss about NJ haunt you every day?
What exactly do you miss in NJ?
If you have a better quality of life for your family there, and your children can safely play outdoors and be happy, I would weigh those positives heavily in my decision. If you are the only one miserable in the family possibly you need to evaluate what is making you miserable. Lack of friends? Family? Adult activities?
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Va. Vs Nj.
Have you thought about a different section of Jersey? That way you'll be "home" without being "home."
