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A some mentioned in above threads, places like Queens would be suitable for you given your lack of past social experience and rather mediocre salary. Manhattan just won't be your speed. Too fast and too expensive.
Try places like Sunnyside or Astoria. Lots of local watering holes full of transients priced out of Brooklyn and Manhattan. I'd also suggest Bayside area by Bell blvd. Various scenes going on over there but it tends to be more of a native Queens born n raised crowd, so I hope you like true blue authentic NYers with real accents.
And if all that fails, and you don't mind men in their late 40s, decent looking/shape/has a car/own house/single...hit me up!!! Even though I'm a white male, I tend to mostly date Hispanic and Asian women, sprinkled in with ethnic Italian cougars time to time. Might be nice dating a transient secular white chick from out of town for a change.
Putting this another way .... There is a high degree of skepticism among Men in their 30's dating Women. Sure you can find guys willing to pay, but in my prior comment note that the type of Men willing to pay are often not the type that you will be attracted to or interested in having a relationship with.
OP you will need to come to terms with what exactly your standards are and how much they deviate from the standard. OK Cupid revealed that basically 90% of Women only find 10-20% of Men attractive. There are constant debates on whether this is true or not - But you need to be honest with yourself and objectively evaluate the following:
- What type of Man am I attracted to and really interested in speaking with
- Do I have competition for this Man and where does he sit on the totem pole in society
- Do I realistically have a chance at getting his attention, maintaining his interest and most importantly AM I willing to make any necessary changes required to my personality and/or physique within reason to succeed with him?
I know MANY single Women in this city and they are pretty much single all for the same 2 reasons:
- Their expectations in Men are beyond their expectations for themselves (they are a 6/10 in terms of attractiveness, personality and wealth aiming for a 9/10)
- They are not willing to compete or improve themselves to get that elevated high value mate
I couldn't have said this better myself, that sums up why i stopped dating for a while in NYC. There is a huge double standard and it is amplified in NYC. The bar is set so high for men but so low for women.
Quote:
Originally Posted by QueensGuy72
And if all that fails, and you don't mind men in their late 40s, decent looking/shape/has a car/own house/single...hit me up!!! Even though I'm a white male, I tend to mostly date Hispanic and Asian women, sprinkled in with ethnic Italian cougars time to time. Might be nice dating a transient secular white chick from out of town for a change.
This is how someone gets catfished and end up either paying for the whole dinner and have a sad story to tell their friends, or waiting for the female to go use the bathroom get separate checks, pay only their portion then ghost her and have a funny story to tell their friends.
Last edited by SoullessOne; 02-14-2020 at 11:28 PM..
I couldn't have said this better myself, that sums up why i stopped dating for a while in NYC. There is a huge double standard and it is amplified in NYC. The bar is set so high for men but so low for women.
This is how someone gets catfished and end up either paying for the whole dinner and have a sad story to tell their friends, or waiting for the female to go use the bathroom get separate checks, pay only their portion then ghost her and have a funny story to tell their friends.
Have you considered reflecting on this a bit and wonder if you set the bar too low for yourself as a person who's dateable? It's not even a money thing, because I was doing fine when I had what would be considered a low income. I sometimes feel like we're entering an era of Jordan Peterson snowflake pep rallies and support groups where guys with ****ty behavior and cultivate being as dull as possible find a way to feel they're excluded for anything but their behavior. It's pretty cute at times, but it's also just annoyingly boring at others.
I, again, want to remind the OP, that this forum is on the cranky side. Cranky being a nice way to encompass a load of people who have a hard time looking in the mirror in some sense. The city's general populace is actually much better than that. Do go to another resource for the advice you're seeking.
I couldn't have said this better myself, that sums up why i stopped dating for a while in NYC. There is a huge double standard and it is amplified in NYC. The bar is set so high for men but so low for women.
The majority of successful long lasting relationships I see are typically among two people who come from very similar geographic, cultural and religious backgrounds.
People are still tribal in nature, transplants from Dorothyville tend to exacerbate this. I know a disproportionate number of “Missourians “ and “Ohioans “ from the SAME EXACT COUNTY/CITY that somehow magically found each other in a sea of millions in this city.
I say this to say: Standards drop significantly when the other person is “familiar “. All of those height, income and abdominal fitness requirements suddenly VANISHED because “OMG his cousin is best friends with my cousin back home and my friends and family would be totally psyched about this because it’s like the perfect Pixar story!!!!!”
But if it’s a stranger - “Stranger danger girl, make sure to check his credit score and criminal record ASAP and if he doesn’t pay on the first date and doesn’t look like [Insert celebrity of choice here] then cue “it’s just not working out” , “not feeling it” , “mmmkay baiiiiii”
From my experience, many people here are users and not into sustaining relationships or keeping in touch, unless it is of benefit to them. I was born and raised in Manhattan and Queens. Perhaps it is the high cost of living which makes earning a living or large population, a higher priority over building relationships.
From my experience, many people here are users and not into sustaining relationships or keeping in touch, unless it is of benefit to them. I was born and raised in Manhattan and Queens. Perhaps it is the high cost of living which makes earning a living or large population, a higher priority over building relationships.
I hate to tell you, but I think this is true across much of the country, possibility coming from the deluded dependence on technology. People imagine themselves to be "keeping in touch" by posting on Facebook.
NYC is rated one of the worst places to date period but specifically for Millennial Women.
A big reason for this is the type of Men that OP may attract is statistically unlikely to be the type of Men she is actually comfortable with, compatible with or wants to date.
"An average Jane" will have more options than the "Average Joe" but those options will likely not be too her liking.
Even though I'm a white male, I tend to mostly date Hispanic and Asian women, sprinkled in with ethnic Italian cougars time to time. Might be nice dating a transient secular white chick from out of town for a change.
And after you're done with them you call ICE right ?
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