Is NYC worth it if all I care about is making friends and dating?
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Opinion:
God Bless you getting past your illness.
I think you will experience a wonderful time in New York.
A good paying job and the possibilities of making and meeting
friends is boundless. Any fisherman will tell you that you don't
even need a hook if fishing over a school of blues. The more the merrier.
Time and experience will be your friend. Don't wear your heart on your sleeve. Test the waters always and playing hard to catch attracts only the most skilled
of fisherman. Hahahaha............. Best wishes in Romance............
Playing hard to get wont work in NYC. NYC millennial's dont chase women, only GenX and older do. OP might not want someone old enough to be her father and some closer to her age. Millennial chivalry is completely dead in NYC. Their mindset is "if you going to make it hard for me then its not worth it" because they have so much other sht thats hard in their life they dont need more headache.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tencent
Yes unfortunately Meetup is more like preschool now where you have to ask the teacher to take a break.
Friend of a friend from work is how many people meet now if you're millennial. Not sure about Gen Z
Unfortunately im currently going down the GenZ rabbit hole and its such a pain to connect with them. To connect with a GenZ they need to see your social profile before they decide to talk to you. So you have to have Instagram or facebook loaded up with lots of pictures of you on vacations out of the country (because they think you will buy them a ticket), lots of pictures of you out at rooftop bars (because they think you will take them there for them to get that selfie), pictures of you in a nice car (because they think you will be driving them around in it).
But you go out, meet a genZ and their too busy posting what they are currently doing on facebook or Instagram. Their out, and too busy with a phone in their face instead of enjoying the moment thats right in front of them.
These are my favourite GenZ replies when i try to get their number:
Me: Can i get your number?
GenZ: follow me on Instagram
Me: Let me get your number so we can link up later.
GenZ: Add me on Snap
Me: Take my number and hit me up later when you free.
GenZ: Message me on Facebook
It makes me feel like im back in the Messenger era when you would ask a girl for her AIM, but she was on MSN, or you would be on MSN, but she was on Yahoo IM, or you was on Yahoo IM, and she was on ICQ.
Playing hard to get wont work in NYC. NYC millennial's dont chase women, only GenX and older do. OP might not want someone old enough to be her father and some closer to her age. Millennial chivalry is completely dead in NYC. Their mindset is "if you going to make it hard for me then its not worth it" because they have so much other sht thats hard in their life they dont need more headache.
Facts! LMAO.
Unfortunately im currently going down the GenZ rabbit hole and its such a pain to connect with them. To connect with a GenZ they need to see your social profile before they decide to talk to you. So you have to have Instagram or facebook loaded up with lots of pictures of you on vacations out of the country (because they think you will buy them a ticket), lots of pictures of you out at rooftop bars (because they think you will take them there for them to get that selfie), pictures of you in a nice car (because they think you will be driving them around in it).
But you go out, meet a genZ and their too busy posting what they are currently doing on facebook or Instagram. Their out, and too busy with a phone in their face instead of enjoying the moment thats right in front of them.
These are my favourite GenZ replies when i try to get their number:
Me: Can i get your number?
GenZ: follow me on Instagram
Me: Let me get your number so we can link up later.
GenZ: Add me on Snap
Me: Take my number and hit me up later when you free.
GenZ: Message me on Facebook
It makes me feel like im back in the Messenger era when you would ask a girl for her AIM, but she was on MSN, or you would be on MSN, but she was on Yahoo IM, or you was on Yahoo IM, and she was on ICQ.
I've heard the second bolded from someone and I personally find it weird when people ask me for my social media profile versus my number. Like my life isn't that interesting lol. I have other sh** to worry about, which doesn't include having all the social media + updated 24/7.
I hate to tell you, but I think this is true across much of the country, possibility coming from the deluded dependence on technology. People imagine themselves to be "keeping in touch" by posting on Facebook.
This.
I moved here to Denver and its an ok city with lots of people moving here, but the common complaint from people its hard to make friends even for those that have been here for a long time.
New York has so many people, you could be super weird and find someone to be super weird with you. Don't lose faith. Give it a try.
Yeah, like, one of your would be boyfriends might be slashing a tourist's throat or riding his motorbike into the subway. What will it be? Shattered, shattered, NYC's crazy.
I don't think NYC is great for socializing - it's such a big city and people are not super friendly
Yes, you can try to find a niche for sure
But I think other cities/countries are certainly better for socializing
This.
I moved here to Denver and its an ok city with lots of people moving here, but the
common complaint from people its hard to make friends even for those that have
been here for a long time.
yah...'making friends.'
Straight women & men (who are single).
There is no platonic friendships. Single (straight) guys are: Not looking for a gal-pals.
If she's attractive (the guy will automatically know in his pen.......mind if he's
attracted to her (and wants to kiss her or have sex with her).
.....once his antenna goes UP --- there "ain't" no platonic
friendship (no palsey-walsies). If she's NOT attractive to the guy -- guy doesn't want
friendship either. then, there's the guy who will sleep with any chick, attractive
or NOT to him. MY story... there ain't no such thing as platonic friendships
between 2 straight, single gals/guys - it's alllllllllllll bulls1hit.
Married men: not allowed to have female friends. the sex
part gets in the way. no wife would like to hear that her husband went for drinks, lunch,
dinner, a play, or go for coffee & a muffin with "another woman." even if the woman was:
(a) a co-worker (b) a business associate. They're nervous about: "oh, are
they going to sleep together?" it's just the way it is.....
The Mrs.: she can have male friends.....if they're gay - the better! NO chance of
anything developing. MANY straight women love to have gay male friends. You're
hanging out with a guy, he may be someone you really like hanging out with and
especially, NO [sexual] pressure.....
Hello: I have been a New Yorker, most my life. I have traveled 48 out of the 50 states, and abroad, and have chosen to remain living here. NYC has it ALL. But, it is not for everyone. That said: you have gotten replies from most males here, and some of them have been good to excellent. However, I am going to be blunt, like most New Yorkers are.
Now, as a woman, new to NYC, your first priority is your PERSONAL SAFETY. And that also goes to the neighborhood, where you choose to live, OR they can easily find you stashed behind a store garbage can somewhere.......You must proceed with caution, with anyone you meet, until you get to know them. Most men here, what they are looking for is SEX, and not really a wholesome relationship, unless they are tied -up raising the children that their wives left behind, when they left them.
If I were you, I would look for Women's Clubs, and make friends with women FIRST. NYC has multitude of them. Visit museums, the theaters, go to all the beautiful botanical gardens we have, AND get to meet other single women, travel clubs, etc., who will apprise you of the dating game in this city. It will take some of your time, but, you will learn quickly what is good for you. Join a GYM, of both genders, again, keeping your eyes fully open......a New Yorker, can spot an out-of-town person, a mile away, and tell you what YOU WANT TO HEAR, until they get you.......
The best of luck to you in your new endeavor.......
Meeting other single women for help/preparation to date men? ??
If they have that ability to help, maybe they won’t be stuck single to start with...
Sasie, are you one of the growing singles in nyc?
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