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My sister has a good friend, of whom has a mother who never worked a day and is proud of it.
She has gotten by for years through some combination of boyfriends/husbands working, child support, welfare, and even making her eldest male children quit school to work and support her.
My sister has a good friend, of whom has a mother who never worked a day and is proud of it.
She has gotten by for years through some combination of boyfriends/husbands working, child support, welfare, and even making her eldest male children quit school to work and support her.
DAMN! How did she do that?????? I can't even make mine get out of bed!!!
I find it a bit sad when mothers get judged for not working. Not that having kids at 16 is a good thing by any means, but once that's done it's a tough spot to get out of. Daycare is not cheap, and if all you qualify for is a dead end minimum wage job, it doesn't make sense to spend more on childcare than you earn. Higher education is expensive for someone with no earnings and a young child. Yes, people find a way out of these situations but it takes a lot of work and dedication, which just not every one has. So I really couldn't blame someone like that if she raised her kids properly. Just wondering, if she didn't "go from man to man" but got married and became a SAHM, would she be less deserving of being looked down upon?
That said, there are some people that I don't respect due to their choices. One of my childhood friends started doing stupid stuff at 14, and at 18 got pregnant with twins. She then proceeded to completely pass their care on to her own parents, while she continued to go out, party, and sleep around. Her mother raised her daughters and still is, I believe they even live with her. Now that is something i find despicable. If you chose to have kids, do the right thing and raise them yourself - don't pass it on to someone else.
DAMN! How did she do that?????? I can't even make mine get out of bed!!!
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
(Now someone please tell me how to get sweet tea out of a keyboard...)
People do make mistakes. The fact that they continue to make irrational and emotionalized rather than reasoned choices is their fault. We don't criticize the person who puts a fork into a light socket - once. But someone who keeps doing it, damaging themselves and any others who try to help them, or those who are determined to ignore the effects of their poor choices on innocents, particularly children produced by those choices - well, any rational person would avoid contact with the one who makes poor choices. If nothing else for their own peace of mind.
I know quite a few folks like you describe; not only ones I grew up with, but ones I have worked on in EMS, in the ER, and been acquainted with throughout my life. I avoid them - mostly because I don't want or need their reactions to their poor choices in my life; but partially because those who cannot make rational and reasoned choices often drag others in with them, and use them as bit players in their endless drama. Thanks, I have a life.
(Now someone please tell me how to get sweet tea out of a keyboard...)
People do make mistakes. The fact that they continue to make irrational and emotionalized rather than reasoned choices is their fault. We don't criticize the person who puts a fork into a light socket - once. But someone who keeps doing it, damaging themselves and any others who try to help them, or those who are determined to ignore the effects of their poor choices on innocents, particularly children produced by those choices - well, any rational person would avoid contact with the one who makes poor choices. If nothing else for their own peace of mind.
I know quite a few folks like you describe; not only ones I grew up with, but ones I have worked on in EMS, in the ER, and been acquainted with throughout my life. I avoid them - mostly because I don't want or need their reactions to their poor choices in my life; but partially because those who cannot make rational and reasoned choices often drag others in with them, and use them as bit players in their endless drama. Thanks, I have a life.
The poor do not have a monopoly on being drama queens.
Chowhound...I don't know how any woman could raise children without "having worked a day in her life"....and perhaps if the [men] who fathered her children had contributed in their up-bringing she would not have had to depend on welfare.
Then why be snobby (looking down your nose at...)?
Why not just gratitude and compassion.
Not everyone has the wherewithal to excel in life.
The average IQ in the US is 98 (that's a tie for 19th place). Average IQ in US and 80 other nations
Way to limit others...not everyone has...yakkity shmakkity. We excel or we fail based on our own will, drive and actions. Personal choices and accountability.
I managed to escape some serious dysfunction in my early growing up yrs. I went to school got a decent job... the usual stuff.
Some of my friends started churning out babies at 16, ended up working dead end jobs, alcoholics etc etc.
One girl in particular looked me up on FB a while back.... chatted politely and "caught up"
Turns out that this woman never worked a day in her life. She stared having babies at 16 and wound being a "grandma" at 36.
She bounced around with a few different men. Never actually working, she got some combination of welfare/social security benefits.
I'm trying to not look down my nose at her.
But it's really hard.
I guess I'm thankful I turned out sorta normal....
Like the title suggests.... I wonder how common it is to know someone like this
Maybe she does not want to waste here time being like you.
She has what she wants, and does not have to work for it.
Maybe she is not looking up to you as a ldol of life,
like you are looking down on her like she is a lo-life dog.
.
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