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Hi guys, struggling with this right now. I want to be close to my family as well, but I don't know if where they are right now feels terribly like "home" to me. Has anyone else dealt with the same issues?
Our family was pretty upset when moved but I think it hit my sister the hardest. She doesn't have any children of her own and she adores her 6 yr old niece. We go to visit as much as we can and they come up when possible but it is a 12 hour drive between us. There are times I really miss hanging out with my sister and times that I miss just shopping with my mom. Plus I worry about not being there if something was to happen. My only grandmother still alive is 88 years old and I do not know how much time I have left with her.
It is really hard at times but I know that our move was what was best for our family . My husband had to go where the job was and to be honest we hated the heat and the humidity of the Gulf south. Do what's best for you and your family.
They will forgive you.
No, my family is really close, but they have always had the belief that is very important to be very independent when you grow up and have your own life and family...plus lots of my family are relocated all over the U.S., and my parents moved from various city to city when I was growing up, due to my Father's employment.
With the internet,cell phones, Vonage, etc, there are so many ways to get keep in contact,
plus we still try to get home for many of the Holidays.
You have to do what is best for your family, and sometimes that means moving somewhere else for awhile.
My sister moved from MI to Guatemala. The older family members did not agree with the decision. She feels it was the best decision for her at the time and had a great experience with it. Bottom line, it is your life to live and you can always come back home. Meanwhile, if you don't make the leap, how will you ever know if it was a bad idea?
We moved from RI to SC for my husband's job. My uncle said
I was breaking my moms heart. I miss my mom and brothers but we had to go where my husband has a job. We love it here and we always knew we
Wanted to live somewhere warmer with a better quality of life.
I moved from RI to Arizona at age 23 and I absolutely loved it. I didn't need to move
But wanted to and it felt like home right away.
When I moved back to RI at 29, it made me more grateful for my family and friends there. Go and enjoy
Your life. You will always have regrets. Do you think
You will regret more if you stay or you go?
No my parents were not upset. I was the last one to leave the nest and they were ready to have their nest back to themselves. I miss my family at times but also appreciate my own space. I remember how crazy it was sharing everything. I think it is all part of growing up and I had an opportunity to move away and was ready to get out the dumpy little town I grew up. Now my brother has my parents living near him. Long term I think I want to be closer to family but not too close.
They weren't upset at all. They were dead. Family is too important to me. More important than extra money, at least to me. You can never get that time back. I wouldn't have moved if they were alive.
My mom was never upset when I moved out of state. She really is my only family. She stated she wants me to be happy and healthy that is what matters. That though she misses me that we can always visit. That being said I have lived away for about 6 years and am hoping to move back in the spring. I do miss having a close family near.
OP have you talked to your family about this issue?
We are moving to Vermont....we are living in Virginia right now. My husband's parents live in Michigan and they have always assumed we'll move closer to them. The kicker is that my husband doesn't want to go back to Michigan. I am originally from Vermont but I didn't need to live there either...but we found land we fell in love with and built a home there. My parents live about 2 hours from our location (though we didn't move to be near them). We could have gone anywhere. Unfortunately my parents-in-law are going to be very upset....my husband hasn't told them yet.... I really think you have to go where you want to go. No one can tell you where you should live...if you are comfortable being far from family, do what you need to do but don't let them influence what is ultimately YOUR decision and YOUR life. I love my in-laws and offered to live near to them....but, hubby was adamant about where he wanted to be.
I moved from Jersey to Denver when I was 34 after spending most of that time in my hometown - leaving was best decision of my life. My family, friends and heck, even my neighbors were distraught. The move was the most freeing thing I have ever done, and I don't regret any aspect of it. Two years later I am so much happier here. I miss my loved ones, and I miss a few of my favorite hangouts, but I have a whole new life here. Everyone in Jersey has gotten over the trauma, even my parents. The difference they see in my happiness levels is so obvious that I think they are kind of alarmed by the realization of how unhappy I was. They're happy for me.
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