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Losing touch with your childhood friends after high school is pretty common. Its perfectly normal for friends to start going different directions in their late teens, early 20s, as people move on to college and careers. It sounds like you no longer share the same interests as your childhood friends, which makes sense. You'll make new ones.
Based on the tone of your post, I can't imagine that these people are still eager to have you around. You'll find friends who you don't view as 'morons' and 'little scared kids', and they'll continue hanging out with people who don't think that of them.
What do you do? Do you work, go to school, or just live at home and hang out with losers?
When I was you age, about 21, I already had a BS from a major university---BTW, didn't owe a penny for student loans,---was working on a Master's, had a credit rating of about 800+, was working at a FT job---geez, I simply didn't have time to "hang" and get high or drunk.
If you're not in school, get going. Contact a local community college, see what your options are. Don't let others pull you down with them. The money you're spending on "hanging", could pay your tuition! Forget the losers in your life, unless you want to be one of them!
I grew up in the Hippie era but was fairly straight regarding drugs.......smoked a joint occasionally with friends but never really liked it (I don't smoke cigarettes either). I had friends who were like you describe, their entire life was consumed with getting high, and I eventually drifted away from them because we didn't seem to fit very well as time when on.
There was one girl I could have been very serious about but she was always getting high on pot. Last I heard from someone she had moved on to heroine and I find that so sad. She was pretty, had a wealthy family, and chose that life instead.
My advice is to wean yourself from those friends and find new ones. There is also some problem if you guys get stopped and they are arrested for drugs, you are with them and could be arrested as well. Time for new friends.
Get rid of old friends, get new friends, get going. Friendship isn't forever because people change. Don1945 is right in that if you are sitting around with pot smokers then the cops will get all of you, including you.
Based on the tone of your post, I can't imagine that these people are still eager to have you around. You'll find friends who you don't view as 'morons' and 'little scared kids', and they'll continue hanging out with people who don't think that of them.
Good point.
If you really think your friends are morons, then maybe you're not really friends at all.
I did the same thing in my late teens early 20's. I did drink a fair amount... I tapered way off as my responsibilities rose. You have begun to see the prolonged childhood your friends are experiencing. It will only slow them down developmentally and ultimately financially.
OP: You are growing up. Your friends are not. Go your separate ways. Realize your values and stick with them - otherwise you are just placating them and being inauthentic. You can find more functional, mature friends.
My son lost some a couple friends due to lifestyle differences after high school. Not necessarily drugs/drinking but there was some of that too. One got really into cars and one got really into sports and they went off to find people who had the same interests. But he was fortunate to have a solid group of friends, including several guys, who to this day (actually at this very moment) hang out doing all sorts of interesting things. They are 22 so occasionally they buy beer or some other alcohol and make a night of that (usually resulting in long, rambling political discussions) but mostly they game, eat, occasionally go where the girls are, game some more.
If you aren't connecting to your old friends you need to get a position to make new ones. Get a new job, move to a new place, take up a new hobby, anything.
Are these people actually able to go to work and function as productive citizens while getting high that often?
If you hang out with people who get more drunk or stoned than you do, it's inevitable that you will find them boring. Once in awhile, OK, but as often as you're describing, they must be baked. How can you even hold a conversation with them? If you're interested in biking, get together with people who do that. They don't have to be your close friends. Do you have MeetUp where you live? Most cities in the US have bike MeetUps. People get together to have rides to interesting places. Or check for a club at a local bike shop. You need some friends who are more healthy and active than these stoners. Ride with some almost-strangers and eventually you'll find some folks you hit it off with for other activities. About Meetup - Meetup
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