How do you deal with a friend who you just found out is racist? (friendship)
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I've been very good friends with a guy I've known for about three years. We're bros. I just got off the phone with him and he explained that he doesn't agree with interracial dating/marriage. I was not expecting anything like that to come from him. He's white and I am black Puerto Rican. I asked him to explain further and he said mixing cultures is not a good thing. I wanted to punch him in the face through the phone.
Then I asked him how he can like me as a friend if I'm technically mixed. He said because I don't act like a "typical negro". I had to hang up the phone at that point. I am completely in disbelief that he could say that to me.
Thing is, I'm close to his whole family. I just never knew they were racist. How do I tell him to politely shove it up his ass?
I probably just wouldn't be friends with him. I live in the deep south and don't have any racist friends. Racism is a huge "turn off" for me whether it's in friendship or romantic relationships.
I probably just wouldn't be friends with him. I live in the deep south and don't have any racist friends. Racism is a huge "turn off" for me whether it's in friendship or romantic relationships.
Definitely a turn off
I just don't want to lose the connection with his family who's always treated me well and done more than they should have for me. Know what I mean? It's a tough call but I cannot tolerate people with racist mindsets
I just don't want to lose the connection with his family who's always treated me well and done more than they should have for me. Know what I mean? It's a tough call but I cannot tolerate people with racist mindsets
So don't.
You'll never change his mind, either. You need to move on from this one if it's a dealbreaker.
I just don't want to lose the connection with his family who's always treated me well and done more than they should have for me. Know what I mean? It's a tough call but I cannot tolerate people with racist mindsets
Just tell him what he said was offensive to you and distance yourself. To be honest, it probably won't change the way he thinks, for some reason racism and homophobia and sexism are just things that some people just can't let go of, but at least maybe he will quit saying those kinds of things to you and other people.
Your friend made the racist comment, not his family-- so don't deem them to be racist.
As for the friend, you can talk to him about how you felt. Just don't do it with the intention or hope you can change his mind. And start withdrawing. You could always Facebook the family and keep the connection that way.
Appreciate the comments guys. You are right, I shouldn't say the whole family is racist since he is the only one who ever made a comment like that. I will distance myself and get over it.
Wait, did a white boy say the N word to you? Next time you see him say I like you too, you are not the typical ......
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