Oversharing at work (wife, boyfriend, husband, person)

[brava4]

I know when you work with people for a while personal info always seems to be shared. Some share more, some much more than others. It amazes me what a few people at work share, details of what I would consider private family matters, but they literally tell everyone. One was even telling her family woes to the cleaning lady.

Do you work with people like this? I honestly wonder if they heard themselves or if they had the opportunity to observe what they do, I wonder if they would get it and tone it down.

[fallingwater]

Yes, I work with a few. I find people like this tell a lot of people their personal woes. It is part of their personalities.

[BOS2IAD]

Yup. I once worked with a mother and daughter who would routinely air their family dirty laundry. The daughter, in particular, had no shame. Her credit rating was in the toilet and she maxed out more than one card---and gladly told people all about this! If it were me, I would be too embarrassed to tell anyone!

Another time I had a boss who was like that. She and her husband lived beyond their means and creditors would routinely call her at work. She told me this. I figured that she told me in confidence so I said nothing to other co-workers. However, it turned out that everybody knew!

I think that people like that don't know it's inappropriate to blab such things to anyone who would listen. It's like they don't know how to be discreet.

[Serious Conversation]

I never share anything very controversial or extremely personal, like finances, at the office.

[brava4]

Yeah, one of the people at work has been telling literally everyone and anyone the details of her son's mental illness problem. She uses absolutely no discretion at all. She said her husband told her that she isn't to be telling people about it. So she planned on telling everyone...she wasn't going to keep it secret. I pointed out to her that there is a big difference between keeping secrets and being private. Some things are just private matters.

[Kayela]

I used to sit outside a fairly good-sized conference room, and OMG - I could not believe some of the stuff people would talk about while they were waiting for everyone to show up. Ack! Did NOT want to know about your anal fissure!! There were times I really wanted to bleach my brain afterwards. Then there was the guy who sat smack in the middle of the cube farm and had loud, bitter conversations with his divorce lawyer on how to screw over his soon-to-be ex wife and kids.

So in response to the question you posed; I think most of these folks would recognize themselves if they saw their behavior in others, and they'd see nothing wrong with it.

I am not a 'sharer' at all - I like to keep the focus on work or light topics, and I try to steer conversations away from learning deep, dark secrets about my co-workers. My private life stays fairly private, and I prefer when others keep theirs private as well.

[cfa-ish]

Originally Posted by Kayela

Ack! Did NOT want to know about your anal fissure!!

Now I do!
Also, you owe me a new keyboard.

[NoMoreSnowForMe]

I worked with a young woman who wanted to tell me about her sex life in detail. I kept telling her it was too much information and I didn't want to know. I was the receptionist at a law firm at the time, so I was captive at my desk. She was one of the legal secretaries and she come hang out at my desk and blurt out the most private stuff you never wanted to know. She was concerned her boyfriend was too kinky....anyway, WAY too much information and she'd blurt it out as I was telling her I didn't want to know!

She'd say, do you think this is weird..... Yes! And don't tell me any more! LOL. That was a weird office.

[woxyroxme]

I reveal next to nothing when it comes to my personal details, I am always nice to the people I work with but I do have a lot of filter when it comes to what I will and will not discuss at work. Some topics, such as sexual details may actually get you in trouble.

[apexgds]

Most people would probably consider my teammates and I to be oversharers. But we aren't just coworkers, we're friends. We're involved in each others' lives outside of the office. So we share as much as anyone would share with a friend.