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My parents(mid 60's), mostly my Dad, are treating people like crap. I had a talk with them and they agreed that they aren't treating people the best. They just lied to me like they do everyone else.
A friend of mine knew I was very concerned about how my Dad, and sometimes Mom, would treat people. He said he has been around my Dad on 3 different occasions in the past 2 weeks that he has treated people like trash. He said he was even embarrassed for him. It wasn't toward him but once. But he only had been around him 3 times this past 2 weeks and each time he made a scene. The group my friend was in, 4-5 other people, all said they avoid him at all costs. My friend even said "your dad has turned into a complete f'n a$$hole". He is really concerned, but wants nothing to do with him. This friend has known him for at least 30 yrs.
My parents closest friends avoid him also. They were all going to go out to eat but my parents said that their friends had family issues come up and couldn't make it. I saw their friends at the restaurant eating together. So I talked to one of the guys, he said "we are just not comfortable having them around. I'm sorry but someone needs to talk to them about how they treat others." He knows I'm concerned and knows how my parents treat me.
How in the ____ do I handle this? they now have a reputation. I don't know if they can correct it.
I don't know if I should talk to them again or just let them figure it out. It's sad to see this happen to them, but they caused it.
Why do you feel the need to do anything. They are getting old....They are likely tired of the fake "always being nice"...and telling it like it is....Let them alone....How rude of your friends to be criticizing your folks... You need to take care of you....If they treat you like crap, and you are old enough to leave..Do it...Make a life for yourself.
Why do you feel the need to do anything. They are getting old....They are likely tired of the fake "always being nice"...and telling it like it is....Let them alone....How rude of your friends to be criticizing your folks... You need to take care of you....If they treat you like crap, and you are old enough to leave..Do it...Make a life for yourself.
Why do I feel like I need to do something? We have the same last name and he is trashing it. He is hurting our business. And I care that he has a reputation of being an a$$ hole. It's not right.
Rude of my friends? they care about them too. Not rude at all, the opposite.
I have made a life for myself and am making a life for my parents after they retire. I don't want to leave them high and dry. And I care about my parents. What kind of jack-wagon would I be to let them go on this way?
You actually sound like my dad, "who cares about others, just take care of yourself".
I don't get this. This kid doesn't like the way his father is behaving? So what? He's the kid.
If it were me, I'd listen and consider what my kid had to say, then make my decision, move on, and be me. Sounds like that's what this guy did. If my kid harped on it, I'd tell him to shut his yap already. He's a person, with his own personality. Grow a thicker skin or learn how to otherwise deal with it.
If he's pi$$ing off his friends, he'll have less friends. It's simple - any kid can understand that. He's an adult - more adult than the OP. He's raised a family, made a home, etc. He understands consequences. OP needs to stop trying to make his father into someone he's not if he's to have a relationship with him. Some people are mean, some are nice, some are skinny, some are fat, some are aggressive, some a timid. Accept who he is (good and bad) and move on.
I don't get this. This kid doesn't like the way his father is behaving? So what? He's the kid.
If it were me, I'd listen and consider what my kid had to say, then make my decision, move on, and be me. Sounds like that's what this guy did. If my kid harped on it, I'd tell him to shut his yap already. He's a person, with his own personality. Grow a thicker skin or learn how to otherwise deal with it.
If he's pi$$ing off his friends, he'll have less friends. It's simple - any kid can understand that. He's an adult - more adult than the OP. He's raised a family, made a home, etc. He understands consequences. OP needs to stop trying to make his father into someone he's not if he's to have a relationship with him. Some people are mean, some are nice, some are skinny, some are fat, some are aggressive, some a timid. Accept who he is (good and bad) and move on.
You make a good point. I think maybe my problem is that I am coming to the realization that my dad is a f'n prick.
You can only change yourself, people are responsible for themselves. I can't change them.
Point well taken.
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Relieved my dad of another responsibility today. Had to because the people he was in contact with for that duty called and said they will no longer deal with him. If we were to do business with them they will talk to me. If I can't do that then they will no longer accept our product.
I'm going to have to end my business relationship with my parents. Before it all crashes and burns.
You make a good point. I think maybe my problem is that I am coming to the realization that my dad is a f'n prick.
You can only change yourself, people are responsible for themselves. I can't change them.
Point well taken.
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Relieved my dad of another responsibility today. Had to because the people he was in contact with for that duty called and said they will no longer deal with him. If we were to do business with them they will talk to me. If I can't do that then they will no longer accept our product.
I'm going to have to end my business relationship with my parents. Before it all crashes and burns.
Lilac,
You're growing into adulthood yourself and you are seeing your dad in a different way because your relationship with him is different. It's now adult to adult I stead of adult to kid. That different relationship is opening your eyes to who he is. Some people are pricks, ok. Try not to let it destroy your relationship with him because in the end, you'll be unhappy. Accept him for his prickness and try to have a roll your eyes kind of attitude. Not disrespectful, but you also don't have to take him so seriously. He's still young but the transformation of you becoming the caretaker is starting. In another 10 years, it'll be more pronounced.
You make a good point. I think maybe my problem is that I am coming to the realization that my dad is a f'n prick.
You can only change yourself, people are responsible for themselves. I can't change them.
Point well taken.
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Relieved my dad of another responsibility today. Had to because the people he was in contact with for that duty called and said they will no longer deal with him. If we were to do business with them they will talk to me. If I can't do that then they will no longer accept our product.
I'm going to have to end my business relationship with my parents. Before it all crashes and burns.
Lilac,
It sucks, but you gotta do what you gotta do to maintain your livelihood. We had to let one of our best service guys go because he was alienating some of our customers. They would call us and tell us not to ever send him back to their business again because he wouldn't shut up about his political views and would get in people's faces about it. You can be a great employee, but if we don't have a customer because of you, that's less money with which we can pay you.
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