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Tell him excessive swearing is fatal to the speaker & the listener & if they don't believe that, you will never see them again. Unless you decide the friendship is more important.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.2089
.... Or "swear like sailors". Anybody have a friend like that or know anyone who swears ALOT? I met this guy who seems like a good dude but he probably uses the F word every other word... even to describe simple things. How do you deal with people like that?
It really doesn't make you a better person that you don't use cuss words. At most it makes you a person that doesn't swear....at worst a judgemental ass.
Right on! My wife has a PhD and swears constantly...big deal.
I read that LA Mag article, interesting stuff. I actually worked with one of the neuroscientists mentioned in the article at the Center for Neural Science at NYU.
I would rather listen to Homer Simpson swear, than whenever Ned Flanders "swears," more irratating than actual cussing to me is the damn, infernal way some people go about unoffensively carying on in their most gentle rage. I am not stupid, I am not low class, I write, and instead of going on and on using my fanciest uppercrust vernacular, I'd rather simply, and elequitly curse, and have it quickly known, and finished.
I'm married to someone like that. Drives me nuts, but it's due to an executive processing issue due to a brain injury. What's most annoying is how people who don't know him stereotype him or look at us askance. He's a perfectly nice guy but people judge him. And me, by extension for being with him. Ah well, such is life.
You should tell them up front. Because if I knew such, I'd have no issue with it whatsoever and be happy to overlook it. People overlook my flaws that I cannot help so I cannot expect any different. In this case, it would just be normal since due to his brain defect, it is normal for him
Mod cut.
Last edited by PJSaturn; 03-01-2015 at 08:45 PM..
Reason: Inappropriate language.
I would rather listen to Homer Simpson swear, than whenever Ned Flanders "swears," more irratating than actual cussing to me is the damn, infernal way some people go about unoffensively carying on in their most gentle rage. I am not stupid, I am not low class, I write, and instead of going on and on using my fanciest uppercrust vernacular, I'd rather simply, and elequitly curse, and have it quickly known, and finished.
Cursing has it's place. If I accidently hit my thumb with a hammer, a curse word may come out. I think that is reasonable and expected.
The issue is when people hold ongoing tension and strife inside...then is unleashed on innocent victims via vulgarities. While passed off as normal and expected that the victim is expected to deal with their blow
This is unfair and the root cause of this anger needs to be dealt with.
What's even more entertaining and fascinating is seeing all the superior attitudes and judgments! It's enough to make one, well, just swear! I agree that constantly using vulgar language is off putting to many, but to start assigning intelligence and worth to people based on it, is really blowing my mind.
Doesn't matter to me. I wasn't born offended by those noises, they're only offensive because someone else tells you that's how you're supposed to react, because someone else told them, who heard it from someone else etc. It's completely arbitrary, there's no logic to it, just people blindly parroting back what they hear from others. I'd feel stupid buying into the idea that there's something bad about certain syllables when you can convey exactly the same meaning with other syllables and no one gives a damn (or a ****, or a ****).
You should tell them up front. Because if I knew such, I'd have no issue with it whatsoever and be happy to overlook it. People overlook my flaws that I cannot help so I cannot expect any different. In this case, it would just be normal since due to his brain defect, it is normal for him
At what point in polite conversation do I drop, "hey btw don't mind my rude husband, he's not rude or low-class, he's just brain injured, tee hee." It's not like he's drooling on himself or laughing uncontrollably. For a while I had little cards I could hand out to strangers if we were in public that talked about his condition in a few words but was a little more discreet. But that's not always appropriate - think about how many people overhear you talk, on a simple outing, with a family member or friend - even harmless conversation that they're not actively paying attention to. Let's say we're hiking a trail, and there are other hikers nearby - do I rush over to them and tell them what's up? Or we're waiting in line at the cash register - do I tell them?
It's not the people who know him that I'm worried about, they already for the most part know why he's the way he is. It's the random people that don't need to know every detail about his medical history - even if the symptoms are out there. I know I can't have it both ways, expect tolerance without disclosing why people SHOULD be tolerant... but it's just a sticky place to be in.
As it is, he rarely leaves the house anymore. He doesn't want to make other people uncomfortable, and he doesn't want people judging him (or our family), shaking their heads at us, glaring - all without knowing him. It's really sad. He used to be very social.
Threads like this hit very close to home for me. It just confirms what I guess I already know - people really are judging, it's not just paranoia.
I read what you posted. It doesn't back up your theory that people who swear are more honest, intelligent and creative. It does say that swearing is more prevalent among adolescent boys and men. Should we then assume those groups are more honest, intelligent and creative than girls and women?
If you want to be creative and seem intelligent while using swear words, quote Shakespeare. He had some doozies, especially in Henry IV.
You can reserve the right to pepper your speech with run of the mill cursing, and I'll reserve the right to think less of you for not being able to get your point across without resorting to it.
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