Men calling men "buddy" (males, person, member, brother)

[Mr.2089]

I may be reading too much into this but it seems like when a random guy calls me "buddy" they're doing it in a condescending way as if speaking to me like I'm a kid. I only say "buddy" to kids or friends kids like "hey buddy"etc. For instance I work in customer service and I notice that if I'm dealing with a type a guy (usually the" bro" type) and I'm sort of speaking "stronger/louder" than he is they get slightly defensive and dismissive with me speaking in very short answers etc and almost always referring to me as buddy when I refer to them as sir. Almost trying to tell me they're the "alpha" and or something. Guys do you do this or am I crazy? I know I don't do it simply because I'm not a d bag.

[CSD610]

Perhaps your speaking "stronger/louder" makes them defensive and dismissive. I know if you raise your voice even slightly to me in any situation you will immediately be told to lower your voice, then you will be watching me walk away.

[WannabeCPA]

Truly good friends don't call each other "buddy". At least I've never heard them call each other that. It can be used in kind of condescending way, not necessarily talking to you like you're a kid, but trust me you're not really their "buddy" when they say that. I heard the guys who stopped the French train attack earlier this year referred to the guy they were holding down as "buddy" at one point. Saying something like "don't move buddy". I don't think it's always derogatory but in your case I sense a slight negative attitude towards you by the customers.

[justanokie]

Its certainly not always derogatory.

I know plenty of guys who refer to others guys as buddy, usually its to people they know however.

People can get used to using a word like that as a generic catch all to refer to other people.

Sailors refer to other sailors as shipmates, when they get out of the service they aren't gonna walk around calling everyone shipmate so they pick up another word to fill that gap and use it to refer to people they know, like people at work and stuff.

However in your case, some stranger calling me buddy? Yep, thats derogatory and would make me frown.

[Mr_Geek]

C'mon buddy this is nothing to get worked up over.

[Calvert Hall '62]

I always considered "buddy" and "pal" as condescending. Same with "friend" used in an earlier era.

[ukrkoz]

I call men buds and buddy all the time.
I picked on this when I came to the country over 30 years ago and worked for years in Southern states. Everyone there is man, brother, bud, luve, and doll. Hun. And it ain't none wrong with it.
when I returned back to the cold hearted state of WA, most of this is not done here. But care I not as I do this with respect and love to others.
Personally, I believe it is matter of personal perception and size of one's ego. If you want to get offended or feel condescended, you will, no matter what others say.

[NewYorker11356]

Meh, I've been called buddy in real life and online. Never really gave it much thought at all. Definitely don't think it was meant to be condescending in anyway.

[jay5835]

"Buddy" is the default name for males who don't know each other in Western PA, especially in a retail/non-fine dining restaurant situation. It took me some time to get used to when I moved here, but it doesn't faze me any longer.

[canadian citizen]

Perhaps this will be of help..........


In Newfoundland and Labrador..........There is a popular music group called ......




Buddy What s His Name and the Other Fellas...... Its a way to speak of somebody whose name you can't remember, right now. Its not insulating in our lexicon, not at all.


In the ROC ( the rest of Canada ) it is also not an insult............


Of course Canadians are known for being polite.


JiM B.