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Thanks everyone for your honest and thoughtful replies. To address a few questions- We typically talk for an hour and text random things to each other through out the week. At some point I was talking too much and could tell she was loosing interest. Now our convos are more balanced. Or I'll just mainly listen about her day. She is introverted and doesn't like talking on the phone that much. However, I assumed she'd make an exception for her kids ��. I guess I'm being a big baby about it....I do catch up with my siblings when visiting the house. Maybe I'll contact them a little more too. I hope they don't think I'm indifferent towards them. As someone already mentioned at least she's not overbearing. I don't mean to be clingy...I'm going to work on calling once a week. If she does say something about it I'll kindly tell her why. Sheesh..I'm feeling anxious lol
As a mother myself, I think she might feel that, since you are "launched" she shouldn't need to still feel like you need to take up her time, when it sounds like her hands are full with other children and work. Also, she may sense that your clinginess is impeding your progress as a person. What can you possibly need to say that's of any importance everyday? If I were you, I would stop calling her unless you have something interesting to say. I bet she will start calling you.
This. I've never understood the need to call home daily, or for that matter, even once/week. Life is routine most of the time; there simply isn't any news to convey some weeks. We go to work, come home, have dinner, may or may not participate in some leisure activity outside the home, or just watch TV. Is this worth chronicling and discussing? I don't get it. To talk about your or her day? How would it be any different from most other days? I don't get the concept.
This. I've never understood the need to call home daily, or for that matter, even once/week. Life is routine most of the time; there simply isn't any news to convey some weeks. We go to work, come home, have dinner, may or may not participate in some leisure activity outside the home, or just watch TV. Is this worth chronicling and discussing? I don't get it. To talk about your or her day? How would it be any different from most other days? I don't get the concept.
Yeah, I consider my mom and I to be really close, but I can't imagine wanting to talk to her for an hour every day. We talk once a week/every 10 days. I've actually been talking to her more recently because my dad had surgery and a family member got a cancer diagnosis, but that's unusual circumstances.
Thanks everyone for your honest and thoughtful replies. To address a few questions- We typically talk for an hour and text random things to each other through out the week. At some point I was talking too much and could tell she was loosing interest. Now our convos are more balanced. Or I'll just mainly listen about her day. She is introverted and doesn't like talking on the phone that much. However, I assumed she'd make an exception for her kids ��. I guess I'm being a big baby about it....I do catch up with my siblings when visiting the house. Maybe I'll contact them a little more too. I hope they don't think I'm indifferent towards them. As someone already mentioned at least she's not overbearing. I don't mean to be clingy...I'm going to work on calling once a week. If she does say something about it I'll kindly tell her why. Sheesh..I'm feeling anxious lol
It sounds more you that's the problem. Why feel so anxious? I thought it was kinda funny that you say in the first post that you say she'll get worried that you don't call.... But she's not picking up your calls.
Just out of curiosity, how often does/did she call her own mother?
She's a working gal...with children still at home.
What's to deal with?..don't push her to do more than she can. She sounds very busy to me.
If you "discuss" with her the fact that you're feeling bothered by her lack of attention, you'll only be making her feel bad when it's really your own problem.
I think once a week is plenty...if she's worried she'll call you!!!
Enjoy your closeness with her, I'm sure she loves you as much as ever...don't put your ideals onto her...it's not fair to her.
It sounds more you that's the problem. Why feel so anxious? I thought it was kinda funny that you say in the first post that you say she'll get worried that you don't call.... But she's not picking up your calls.
Just out of curiosity, how often does/did she call her own mother?
My grandma would call her everyday and sometimes multiple times a day. Yes that greatly annoyed her. A few months ago I didn't call for about 5 days because she wasn't answering. I knew she was okay because I had been talking to my sister and she didn't say anything bad happened. Then she sent me text asking if I was okay and then called 2 hours later while I was at work. She's done this a few times I've tried to scale back..so I thought it was ok to call her more often.
She's a working gal...with children still at home.
What's to deal with?..don't push her to do more than she can. She sounds very busy to me.
If you "discuss" with her the fact that you're feeling bothered by her lack of attention, you'll only be making her feel bad when it's really your own problem.
I think once a week is plenty...if she's worried she'll call you!!!
Enjoy your closeness with her, I'm sure she loves you as much as ever...don't put your ideals onto her...it's not fair to her.
Thank you so much! Yes she is very busy and has always been that way. I'm so thankful for all that she has done for our family. I will get over this...however am I being too selfish for feeling this way?
Do you have anyone else you can call? Have you had problems making friends because you want more contact than the prospective friend does?
I rarely talk on the phone with my friends unless we are making plans to hang out. Or if its a long distance friend. We mostly text. I don't have many friends, but I'm satisfied.
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