Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Maybe he always felt badly about not standing up for you, his friend, with the group and this is his way of starting a dialogue so he can apologize.
Very true.
OP, I am guessing you're young. Here's a really novel idea.....you ready?
Pick up the phone and have an actual conversation. I know that's an odd concept to many young people these days.
The reason you do this you can hear the inflection in his voice, his responses and his tone of voice is going to tell you much more than you get online.
After the conversation and if you still live not too far from each other, you can than decide if you want to meet in person and look at restoring the friendship.
OP, I am guessing you're young. Here's a really novel idea.....you ready?
Pick up the phone and have an actual conversation. I know that's an odd concept to many young people these days.
The reason you do this you can hear the inflection in his voice, his responses and his tone of voice is going to tell you much more than you get online.
After the conversation and if you still live not too far from each other, you can than decide if you want to meet in person and look at restoring the friendship.
But call him, not text, call.
I think a lot of younger people today don't even realize that their smartphone actually has a telephone option. Real conversations with voices involved? What's that?
The purpose of my friend "reaching out" to me is right there in your subject title whether you intended it or not. You called him "my friend" instead of a "former" friend so in some way you still consider him to be one.
He reached out to you first and what's the harm in just talking to him after all of these years ? Does he know how you feel about him not supporting you when you came out ? If he was that close why didn't you tell him first ?
Some people don't know how to react to news like this and maybe he has insecurities about himself.
There are too many unknowns in this scenario for you to just brush him off.
Holding grudges isn't good for you either.
Maybe your friend is finally coming out of the closet if he is gay, and feels badly about not standing up for you when you came out. Sounds like he needs a friend or just wants to re-connect.
Only if you feel like it, try ONCE to re-connect. If you get bad vibes, then listen to them, but you two might be a good solid friendship again once you talk about the past problems.
Nobody can tell you what he is thinking. Your suspicions might be right but who cares. It doesn't matter. If you don't want to talk to him then don't talk to him. If you do, then talk to him. The ball is in your court. I would agree with the others who said to ask him why he is approaching you?
Maybe he doesn't know that he was ex-d out by you. You said he didn't do anything to you directly. He was part of the group and it was guilt by association. He didn't stick up for you. Maybe he thinks that he didn't do anything to harm you and he doesn't know that he is disowned.
Long story short, I'm gay, and I had a fallout with my old group of friends. Massive drama.
He's also now been favoriting some of my posts as of late.
What gives. Should I just unfollow him? Or unblock him and text him? Or no? Because I am much better off without my old group, but I AM curious as to why he would message me randomly and seemed adamant in wanting me to want some of my possessions back???
I think you can change him from 'friend' to 'acquaintance' on Facebook. This limits some of what he can see on your page and he won't know you've done this. Also, you can personalize each post and limit him from seeing your posts by adjusting who can see them. A little time consuming if you post a lot but might be time well spent if you don't want him in your life on Facebook.
Long story short, I'm gay, and I had a fallout with my old group of friends. Massive drama.
...
Anyways, I suffered a lot because of this group.
There was one friend I was pretty close to. He didn't "do anything" directly but he didn't defend me in my time of need, or reach out to me, and that's more than enough to consider him not my friend.
Agreed. Your former friends sound like total douches.
Just my opinion, but it smells like more drama is brewing here. If he wasn't your friend before, what makes you think he has a stab at being your friend again? While there are (very few) exceptions, people are made how they're made, and they don't undergo radical transformations. I have seen people try hard to go from total a-holes to really nice guys by moving, getting a new group of friends, and starting over. Then they figure out a more pleasant method to be the same sacks of garbage that they previously were, or they keep their actions out of peoples' view a little bit better.
I'd pass on this whole thing, IMO.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
