Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Find yourself doing things for your kids all your life and all of a sudden your an empty nester without many close friends to do things on the weekend with. We have plenty of work friends but work is work. Anyone else feel this way and if so where does a couple go to meet other couples... for friendships... to hang out with.
Now that your kids are grown up and moved out take advantage of the time to pursue hobbies, volunteer, learn something new like a language, etc, etc. In doing so you'll meet new people and hopefully forge new friendships.
Find yourself doing things for your kids all your life and all of a sudden your an empty nester without many close friends to do things on the weekend with. We have plenty of work friends but work is work. Anyone else feel this way and if so where does a couple go to meet other couples... for friendships... to hang out with.
If you're just now an empty nester over the age of 60 then one can assume either you had your children when you were 40, or your children didn't leave home until they were 40.
Either way, what about friends you and your spouse had while you were raising your children? Are they still living in your area?
My husband and I have also had some difficulties with making new friends in the mature age range. We do have friends and get out with other couples about once a month -- but its usually just dinner and drinks. I'd like to find friends to engage in more active events and our local friends typically don't have such interests. So we have gone on some road scholar trips. Www.roadscholar.org . We have been taking some classes at the local community college and also the local university in their emeritus program or adult ed. And, we are going to try living in an active 55+ community by leasing for a year before buying.
If you live in a reasonably populated area, start a seniors or senior couples activity meetup group on Meetup.com. It may just start with you and your husband meeting for a meal or coffee with another couple or two and grow from there as people become aware you're doing this. I bet there are other people out there in your same boat.
Yes. You need to find things you want to do. Take lessons in a creative activity, or join a walkers' or hikers' group, or join a book club. It is hard to make new friends when you are older. But it can be done.
If you are religious, you can find a church that has activities for older people.
You can also volunteer.
I know this is hard, but there are things you can do to get out of the house. Start by thinking of the things you longed to do when you didn't have time because of family obligations.
I have found new relationships as a senior to be difficult. But, what I did enjoy when I lived where it was available (before moving to a small affordable town), was signing up for day bus trips through the senior center where I lived in the SF Bay Area. I also went on an overnight wine tasting trip with another group that went out to eat and went wine tasting.
What I loved about those, was that I didn't have to develop friendships, I could just sign up and go by myself. I had no problem just chatting with others on the trip or finding others to share a table with for lunch or dinner, etc.
I have found friendships to be challenging all of my life, but I think seniors are especially needy. I don't want to hear about someone's physical ailments or treatments in fine detail, or be expected to be their caregiver, etc. But, I love what my counselor calls my "chance encounters" or "drive-by relationships," LOL. I enjoy chatting with people who show up at gardening workshops, etc., where it's still a social situation, I have company, I learn something, etc., but I can then go home with no complications.
I think when we're young, it's easier to have relationships and discussions that focus on fun and hope for the future. But, for most seniors, that's not the focus of their lives anymore. And they can be downers and needy.
My point being, you are probably not really missing anything LOL. Just get out and take classes, go to workshops, and enjoy some "drive-by" encounters, without getting enmeshed in their junk.
I think real friendships are few and far between anyway, even when you're young. When you're young, you kind of live in a world of acquaintances, which you think are actually friends, but you're too busy to realize it.
I have found new relationships as a senior to be difficult. But, what I did enjoy when I lived where it was available (before moving to a small affordable town), was signing up for day bus trips through the senior center where I lived in the SF Bay Area. I also went on an overnight wine tasting trip with another group that went out to eat and went wine tasting.
What I loved about those, was that I didn't have to develop friendships, I could just sign up and go by myself. I had no problem just chatting with others on the trip or finding others to share a table with for lunch or dinner, etc.
I have found friendships to be challenging all of my life, but I think seniors are especially needy. I don't want to hear about someone's physical ailments or treatments in fine detail, or be expected to be their caregiver, etc. But, I love what my counselor calls my "chance encounters" or "drive-by relationships," LOL. I enjoy chatting with people who show up at gardening workshops, etc., where it's still a social situation, I have company, I learn something, etc., but I can then go home with no complications.
I think when we're young, it's easier to have relationships and discussions that focus on fun and hope for the future. But, for most seniors, that's not the focus of their lives anymore. And they can be downers and needy.
My point being, you are probably not really missing anything LOL. Just get out and take classes, go to workshops, and enjoy some "drive-by" encounters, without getting enmeshed in their junk.
I think real friendships are few and far between anyway, even when you're young. When you're young, you kind of live in a world of acquaintances, which you think are actually friends, but you're too busy to realize it.
Find yourself doing things for your kids all your life and all of a sudden your an empty nester without many close friends to do things on the weekend with. We have plenty of work friends but work is work. Anyone else feel this way and if so where does a couple go to meet other couples... for friendships... to hang out with.
Meetup.com.
But generally, if you haven't those friends so far, it probably won't happen, now. Friendships develop over time, something that older people have less of.
I would say to focus on doing activities you like and don't expect friendships to develop through that. But you will meet people who like the same activities, so you may develop acquaintances through that avenue.
Single people may be better at developing friendships than couples, but I'm not sure. That's because single people have more experience with it. When you were too involved with your family to have friends and interests of your own, singles were continuing to meet new people and such. Some women I've known cont'd to have friends, even though they had families. Now that the kids are gone, they still have those friends.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Start your own Meetup group
