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That post you quoted was ugly, mean, and small minded. People can say what ever they like, it's a free country and all, but come on. One can only read some much completely and utterly inane drivel.
Good thing is that most people see that sorta stuff for what it truly is.....garbage.
You need to spend a week or so shadowing a Child Protective Services worker. I promise, you will see things that give you nightmares for the rest of your life.
Location: Finally the house is done and we are in Port St. Lucie!
3,487 posts, read 3,347,512 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MarciaMarshaMarcia
You need to spend a week or so shadowing a Child Protective Services worker. I promise, you will see things that give you nightmares for the rest of your life.
Some of us (not me anymore) still have nightmares and probably will for the rest of their lives. It used to happen when watching movies that dealt with this subject matter. I tend to avoid these movies now.
What Chowhound is objecting to is the statement that those of us posting, about our experiences, are not exactly truthful.
Some of us (not me anymore) still have nightmares and probably will for the rest of their lives. It used to happen when watching movies that dealt with this subject matter. I tend to avoid these movies now.
What Chowhound is objecting to is the statement that those of us posting, about our experiences, are not exactly truthful.
That is the garbage.
I am agreeing with you. Chowhound needs a dose of reality.
Location: Finally the house is done and we are in Port St. Lucie!
3,487 posts, read 3,347,512 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MarciaMarshaMarcia
I am agreeing with you. Chowhound needs a dose of reality.
I'm sorry, but you are misunderstanding me. I agree with Chowhound. The person that is trivializing our experiences as 'just whining about a bad parent' is spouting garbage.
Chowhound is not the one stating that. I have not found any of his postings on this thread offensive. I feel more empathy from him than from some that have posted.
Post number 10 is what I was talking about as what was mean spirited. I'm not picking on people's abuse stories. I'm getting terribly misunderstood here folks.
I wonder if people understand the Mommie Dearest reference. These 'grain of salt' responses make no sense if you understand what Mommie Dearest means.
No.... Wire.... Hangers!!!!
I've seen the movie and read book as well. Incidentally, my mom saw the movie and saw a lot of herself in "Mommie Dearest"... She toned it down some time after realizing that and is full of regrets now.
Location: Finally the house is done and we are in Port St. Lucie!
3,487 posts, read 3,347,512 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chowhound
Post number 10 is what I was talking about as what was mean spirited. I'm not picking on people's abuse stories. I'm getting terribly misunderstood here folks.
I get ya
My reading comprehension level is waaaaaaaaaaaay up there.
Here's a person who goes through the effort of carrying around a life inside the womb, painfully gives birth, changes diapers, feeds, and raises a child. Such a person must be a nurturer; and after all of that turns on the child. Not saying that I'm so ignorant as to believe that such people don't exist; it's just that they exist in far greater numbers than I realized.
Color me disillusioned.
Or you could consider that a great deal of the drama you read on here has either been exaggerated beyond recognition or simply ginned up whole cloth.
Want to know the surefire sign? OP describes a problem that is completely, utterly over the top. People start poking holes in it, either the logic or the inconsistencies in the story. Suddenly OP comes back with fresh new corroborating detail that just happens to prop up the story further. And so on and so on.
Remember this. In any disagreement, there's always one side, the other side, and the truth.
To answer the subject line question .. yes, sometimes I am a bit bothered by reading so many 'Mommy Dearest' posts because I am not certain they are all true.
My mother, now deceased, was a good mother I think and yet I don't remember ever hearing 'I love you' from her nor really being hugged but I never heard her yell either. She wasn't my best friend but she cooked and cleaned and clothed us and made a home for us and was really intelligent and a great example and was 'kind' to people, even me. And yet she never veered from making sure I got punished when it was warranted either - she just was never the one to do it .. she left that to my father. Somehow I came out of childhood admiring her and still do, long after her death.
I know people who had mothers just like mine and who think those mothers were awful and screwed them up forever.
And I am a mother and I am certain my daughter thinks I am the worst thing to ever have been born much of the time - and yet, though I admit to being a bit louder than my mother at times (I did cancel part of that out by saying 'I love you' a fair bit though I think, and believe me, she had a lot less physical punishment than I endured in my own childhood), I also did all the above for my daughter as my mother did for me, spent a lot of time trying to make her life special and ensure she was loved and educated and cared for, etc. .. but that was all for naught apparently for some reason I can't fathom. I didn't harm her physically and I know I did the best I could (though I also know I made mistakes .. what parent doesn't), but now my daughter goes to therapy to try to figure herself out and it seems the therapist must think I am the problem (since I am told I am - but not 'how' I was so of course I am not allowed to help fix it at all if there was something I was responsible for). Go figure. Easy to blame someone who is not there, it seems.
So if someone has parents who were guilty of great neglect or there was real abuse of some kind .. I think the stories are warranted and hopefully for the teller they are somewhat cathartic .. and I am so very sorry they were subjected to that kind of childhood (and/or had it continue into adulthood). And there may be a lot more of that around than I ever knew about - my heart goes out to all who suffered that kind of thing. I didn't. And my daughter didn't either - but I am sure if she posted here, she could make you THINK she did because for some reason I think she believes she was maltreated in some way despite what I would say was quite a normal, yet privileged and loving upbringing for the most part.
Or you could consider that a great deal of the drama you read on here has either been exaggerated beyond recognition or simply ginned up whole cloth.
Want to know the surefire sign? OP describes a problem that is completely, utterly over the top. People start poking holes in it, either the logic or the inconsistencies in the story. Suddenly OP comes back with fresh new corroborating detail that just happens to prop up the story further. And so on and so on.
Remember this. In any disagreement, there's always one side, the other side, and the truth.
I just can't with these types of posts anymore.
To anyone coming to this thread: If you have not watched the movie, "Mommie Dearest", please go watch it first, then come here and re-read the posts. We are NOT talking about adults who blame their mom for everything that went wrong in their life, we are talking about abusive parents, specifically 'moms' in this case.
The odds that someone who was abused would "exaggerate" is undoubtedly nill. They don't have to, what happened to them is horrible enough. If you (general) can't possibly fathom that some "parents" out there actually DO treat their own children this way, then I suggest you take some time out of your life to find out just how bad some parents can be.
I refuse to sit silent while some people trash on people who have suffered, greatly, and it was VERY real. There's no need to "prop up the story further"; the hell that some people have gone through as kids needs absolutely NO embellishment.
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