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One of my closest friends has this habit of telling me the same story over and over again. She'll tell me something that happened to her, then a day or two later will start telling me the same story again. And whenever I'd interrupt her to say, "Yes I know, you told me about that on Monday," she will continue right on with her story ignoring me.
What I've had to do is adjust my response to her and instead, after telling her that I knew cause she already told me, I add a question to try to get an update to the situation, such as, "What was the result of your conversation with so&so?", or, "Did you ever hear back from so&so about the (whatever topic) or are you still waiting for them to get back to you?", or, "How did they reply to you when you confronted them?", etc. You get the jist. It sometimes works to get her to stop telling me the same story again. But other times she still feels compelled to reiterate what she already told me and keeps right on telling the same story. I feel like this may be a sign of an early cognitive impairment of some type but I'm not sure. I'm not a doctor but it doesn't seem normal to me.
Does anyone else have someone like that in their life who does this? How do you deal with them? I have another friend who used to do that but she's been better about catching herself and says in the middle of her story, "Did I tell you this already?"
My husband has always done that but now he prefaces an old story with "I know I've told you this before", and he launches into a story I've heard 50 times. I have never understood it. Why do people like to repeat the same stories? I've never understood it.
Some people just don't remember if they've already told someone the same story.
If I'm having a conversation with someone and I can add something to the conversation I've already said I'll say, that reminds me of the story I told you about ...(and briefly just give a few highlights) the person I'm taking with usually reponds with, oh ya, that's right ! This way I'm showing the listener I'm aware of already saying a story and it works out in the conversation.
I have a friend that constantly repeats stories, what I really don't like is she starts to tell the story like it's the first time she's told me, so I nicely say, I think you've already told me this (and I'll say isn't this the time of the vacation ...) doesn't even make a point she'll just continue telling the story.
I understand that a lot of people repeat the same story but what I don't understand is, once you tell them that they already told you, why do they insist on telling you again? Like, what's the deal with that? If I started telling someone something and they said, "Yeah I know cause you told me yesterday", I would say, sorry, and I'd change the subject. I wouldn't keep telling them the story again.
Do you see what I mean? I'm questioning what would make a person keep talking when they've been told it's a repeat. I just don't get it.
Yes we have one friend who never stops talking. So I think it's more a way for her to keep talking since she runs out of things to say. I will usually daydream until someone else talks or do what you do and say "Oh yeah you told us that, how did it turn out?" or whatever.
I went on a date with a guy once who told some 'hero' stories (like how he helped an old lady change her tire), and told the SAME stories on the second date. He did not seem to remember anything I did or said on the first date. It did not reach a third date.
I have a very dear friend of over 30 years who does this. She has other irritating habits regarding conversation, too. She interrupts, or if she listens to my news she doesn't comment back about my content -- just lets me finish and then launches into a topic about herself. Makes me believe she was not really listening to me, only playing out what to say next in her mind as I spoke.
I have tolerated this for many years because I really do love her, and our shared history. We live far apart and had weekly phone calls that usually lasted 60 - 90 minutes. A year ago she visited me and I found she chattered constantly during a movie we went to (even tho I shushed her several times). Its gotten to the point that I don't care to converse with her any longer. And I avoid talking with her. It might be onset of dementia but I just think life is too short to put up with the phone calls any more. Sad.
My husband has always done that but now he prefaces an old story with "I know I've told you this before", and he launches into a story I've heard 50 times. I have never understood it. Why do people like to repeat the same stories? I've never understood it.
My wife and I have gotten into that habit already and we've only been together three years. However, we spend a lot more time together than most couples. We're not retired yet, but I work only two or three days a week and she works an irregular schedule mostly from home. Repeat stories inevitably crop up. It's OK though, we love to talk and listen anyway.
My husband does this. I just shut him down (in a nice way) when he starts.
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