Was I too harsh? (female, male, person, house)

[oh-eve]

Originally Posted by ItsRick24

I did call her. On the very day. And her response was, "I'll let you know when you get here." To which I asked emphatically, "Yes or no?" And the answer was "I'm not really sure...." That response did it - I skipped her place and just went alone.

How annoying. NEXT!

[49ersfan27]

You're much nicer than I would've been for sure.

[BobCaldwell]

I don't want to assume this is that same nutcase you've been catering to--you seem too smart and too direct for that (and then to be clueless enough to come here and start posting about her again, pointlessly--I just don't see it).

However, if this is her, yet again...seek help, man. Professional, I mean.

[strandedx02]

Seems pretty clear from context "tired of hearing the same lame excuses over and over" that you knew she was a flake before this. So I probably would have just invited another friend from the start. It's not your fault that she's flaky, but it does seem like a lot of drama that could have been avoided pretty easily.

Someone can still be a good friend in other ways if they're wishy-washy about scheduling, but it doesn't seem like that's the friend you'd want to rely on to be your guest to a party.

[BobCaldwell]

Originally Posted by strandedx02

Seems pretty clear from context "tired of hearing the same lame excuses over and over" that you knew she was a flake before this. So I probably would have just invited another friend from the start. It's not your fault that she's flaky, but it does seem like a lot of drama that could have been avoided pretty easily.

Someone can still be a good friend in other ways if they're wishy-washy about scheduling, but it doesn't seem like that's the friend you'd want to rely on to be your guest to a party.

Sadly, some folks thrive on drama, keep it around them, and then rush to whatever message board(s) to gleefully share it with the world.

Over and over.

With the same person they've been advised to stop wasting time with.

[oh-eve]

Originally Posted by ItsRick24

A friend of mine's birthday was last Saturday. They had a big party and I was invited to bring a friend.
So I call a good (female) friend, mentioned the birthday party and all; she met my friend once, and the others, thought they were cool, no sweat. Anyway, my friend had no plans (she claimed) for that Saturday night - so I said, "How about you come with me to (name of person's) birthday party?"
I get the "I don't know"s, the "We'll see"s, the "Maybe"s, so I withdrew the offer and went by myself.

My friend got upset, hurt, yelled at me for going - she wanted me to come all the way to her house to hear whether she was coming with me or not! I said, "Sorry, but I live by a rule: Anything other than a solid "Yes" is a "No" - that even includes Maybe's, We'll see's, etc." She wanted me to come to her house the day of the party, when she lives in the total opposite direction, when I could just go to the party itself - only for her to give some bull**** excuse as to why she won't go? (i.e. My back hurts, my legs hurt, I'm tired, whatever.)

So was I too harsh in passing her up, because I was tired of hearing the same old lame excuses over and over?

You either have a lot of weird women around you or is this always the same ones??

[JrzDefector]

Dude, I think you need to get better friends. I've said this forever. But you are the common denominator in all your posts. So maybe it's time to do some more work on yourself. I know you've been working at things, but maybe you need to switch gears? Get a new perspective?

Stop bringing unsatisfactory people into your life.

[ClaraC]

What's not being said here? Did she want you to come to her house to hang out for awhile (doing whatever, don't know what you usually do together) and then she was going to decide during the evening if she wanted to go to the party?

No one says hey come all the way over here to pick me up for an event and I'll tell you when you get here if I want to go after all.

No one.

[Ruth4Truth]

Originally Posted by ClaraC

What's not being said here? Did she want you to come to her house to hang out for awhile (doing whatever, don't know what you usually do together) and then she was going to decide during the evening if she wanted to go to the party?

No one says hey come all the way over here to pick me up for an event and I'll tell you when you get here if I want to go after all.

No one.

Yes, that was the strange part of the story. OP, is this the same woman as in your other threads? This is too much drama to put up with, and it makes no sense. She flies off the handle, just because you went to an event without her, after she was very wishy-washy about it in the first place?

And btw, why didn't either of you call the other about it, the day before, to ask, "Are you in, for this event, or not?" Do you two play games with each other, or something? She hemmed and hawed originally, so you decided to cut her out without telling her, as a sort of punishment, is that what happened? But her reaction--that you should drive over to her place to find out if she wanted to go, rather than calling her (or her calling you), was bizarre.

I'd have to agree that there must be more to this story than meets the eye. You two seem to have an odd history of little power struggles with each other, among other things.

[ItsRick24]

And let me say this for what I hope is the last time...
This was not, repeat, NOT, the woman I had discussed previously. I cut ties with her and moved on. This is another female friend, on-and-off FWB and someone I've known for decades.