Pushy neighbors..what would you do? (husband, person, house, neighborhood)
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We had a neighbor we have never met ring the doorbell at 9:45pm yesterday to request we give her our parking space for her upcoming move. I have never had contact with this person previously and would not have answered the door except we had a friend leave about 15 mins before and thought it was just him returning because he had forgotten something.
We can't give her the space as we need it for a contractor who is doing work on our house. In fact, we have had several workers coming on the day she requested and got permission for additional street parking from the city. We posted signs as is the process (and paid a fee to do this). She wanted us to take them down so she could use the spaces.
She then made a comment that we had a "real mess" in the house as she peeked into our foyer. Well yeah, we are undergoing a remodel. That tends to be messy. She was very put out that we would not comply with her. I finally said "I don't know what to tell you. We have to go to bed now. It was nice to meet you. " when it was clear she didn't want to leave.
She had poked her head over the fence while my SO was trimming the lawn a week or two ago and peppered him with questions about whether we were "renters" or owned the place, commenting that we were "young to live in such a nice area." I really am a keep-to-myself type and since buying the house in July, I couldn't name two others who live on the street. That is fine with me. This person and her husband are retirees and from her comments to my mate, she seems upset/curious that we are living in the same upscale area as her. This seems nosy.
The parking thing smacks of entitlement to me. I have a legit reason to use the spaces. I went through the process to secure them. She has owned the house since June and is just now moving in. Seems like she could have easily carved out a plan before now.
My mate, who is nicer than me, said it would just be easier to give her the space. It probably would. But I need them. What would you do?
Because of her behaviour towards you, I'd go out of my way to NOT give her the space. Maybe if she paid you? She sounds dreadful.. sorry to hear she is moving in, not out! Someone needs to tell her you get people to do things for you if you're nice to them. Wow.
Putting aside her rude behaviour (an issue in itself ) I would try to find a way to compromise and would not presume anything on why she could or couldn't line up moving in sooner. If there is absolutely no way you can compromise then so be it. Doesn't sound like a good start to neighborhood relations ��
Maybe you can be a helpful neighbor and explain the process of securing and paying for extra parking spaces in advance of needing them. This way you are letting her know that you do actually need them, you aren't just arbitrarily saying no to her, but you are also making an effort to be a good neighbor and let her know how things work there.
As far as her being nosy and commenting on how young you are to live in such a nice area... if she brings it up again tell her you are scaling down and if you decide that you like it here then you might go ahead and sell the big house. That should give her something to chew on.
Maybe you can be a helpful neighbor and explain the process of securing and paying for extra parking spaces in advance of needing them. This way you are letting her know that you do actually need them, you aren't just arbitrarily saying no to her, but you are also making an effort to be a good neighbor and let her know how things work there.
As far as her being nosy and commenting on how young you are to live in such a nice area... if she brings it up again tell her you are scaling down and if you decide that you like it here then you might go ahead and sell the big house. That should give her something to chew on.
I did explain the process of securing spaces to her as well as why we needed them. I also let her know that we are planning for the work to last a certain length of time as well as what was going on during the day in question. None of this seemed to make much impression.
I did explain the process of securing spaces to her as well as why we needed them. I also let her know that we are planning for the work to last a certain length of time as well as what was going on during the day in question. None of this seemed to make much impression.
Then you have done as much as you can. Don't let it take up any more space in your head.
Normally, the way I decide if I am going to feel bad about something is I put the shoe on the other foot. If you were moving in and asked her to give you her spot do you think she would? If the answer is no then you shouldn't give it another moment's thought.
Keep your parking spaces as long as you need them. And consider yourself lucky that she has unwittingly put you on notice to keep your distance from her!
Also if you give into her now, that sets the tone for the entire relationship. I know you don't want to have anything to do with her, however she is a neighbor and you will have to sometimes.
Good luck!
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