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I wouldn't say that he's "always" complaining about something. He does seem to have an awful lot of pet peeves, but my chats with him are generally friendly, with the peeves only brought up when relevant. I'm only making a big deal about the car issue because it seems rather extreme. Most people eventually accept changes in the world, even if grudgingly, but I know few people who go to such great lengths to avoid them.
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Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
Oh, good grief! Tell him to buy an old Toyota for $2000. End of whining.
Last time we discussed the matter, he said something about having found a 13-year-old Honda with 140,000 miles selling online for $5,000. It was too much.
I do like him. I just don't like to see him making life so difficult for himself. At some point, we have to accept that the world changes and he's adding aggravation to his life by not wanting to change with it.
It just seems ironic to me hearing him complain so much about this, after having so many conversations over the years about how "people need to change to fit into the world, as opposed to expecting the world to change to fit them." The fact is, the type of car he likes has become very rare. And complaining about it isn't going to make it any easier to find one.
There are thousands of people who prefer older low tech cars and hundreds of places to buy them. Eventually he'll be more and more limited to "vintage" car sale places. Nothing wrong with that at all. The chase is part of the satisfaction, and casual complaining is part of the chase. I doubt he really finds life as difficult as you think he does. Some people work themselves up to a decision by thinking out loud to an audience. Just a habit, not a true problem. If he never actually does anything about his complaints that's another issue. You can't solve anything for him if he doesn't want you to.
I wouldn't say that he's "always" complaining about something. He does seem to have an awful lot of pet peeves, but my chats with him are generally friendly, with the peeves only brought up when relevant. I'm only making a big deal about the car issue because it seems rather extreme. Most people eventually accept changes in the world, even if grudgingly, but I know few people who go to such great lengths to avoid them.
Last time we discussed the matter, he said something about having found a 13-year-old Honda with 140,000 miles selling online for $5,000. It was too much.
Hondas and Toyotas with that mileage usually go for around $2000. So yeah, it was too much. Where does he live, a high COL area, where prices are inflated? He could cruise the listings in low COL states, call the number on listings that interest him, and fly out there, wherever, to drive the vehicles and decide on one. Would still end up costing him half or less, than $5000. IDK where y'all live, but there should be at least a few Hondas & Toyotas available, with that mileage, for way less than $5000. I live in a small town, and there's often between 2-5 such listings, or "for sale" signs by the side of the road, and whatnot. I guess the listing he found was from a dealership? Still, $5000 is much too high.
I prefer vintage sewing machines for the same reason; I can fix them. usually.
A car is a much bigger purchase than a sewing machine, but I can relate to his mindset.
Like pretty much all the other posters, I don't see this as "rules don't apply to me," which has a tinge of "the world owes me a living." This is more like "I'd rather do it myself!"
The chase is part of the satisfaction, and casual complaining is part of the chase.
I don't know that my friend sees it this way, but I can't say for sure. When he talks about it, it's usually in a "I REALLY don't want to have to do this" tone.
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Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
He could cruise the listings in low COL states, call the number on listings that interest him, and fly out there, wherever, to drive the vehicles and decide on one.
He seriously considered this at one point, not so much because of the prices but because we're in the north where cars go bad faster due to the salt on the streets in the winter. He entertained the idea of flying south and buying a car there, but eventually decided it was too risky.
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Originally Posted by steiconi
Like pretty much all the other posters, I don't see this as "rules don't apply to me," which has a tinge of "the world owes me a living." This is more like "I'd rather do it myself!"
Yes, I realized after my OP that I used some poor examples to make my point. It just struck me as noteworthy that his gripes about his car situation resembled traits that he doesn't seem to like in other people. I just hope he's able to find something that works for him before his current car dies for good.
I see your point, but can’t quite draw the same conclusion as you. He is not flouting rules, or acting entitled. But he does, or has had, unrealistic expectations.
If he scours the earth, he might find an old car that is in great shape, with low miles. Or he might not. He will probably end up buying something when he has to.
He’ll probably complain and or tell you about how he makes his decision. It sounds as if saving a buck is part of his value system.
Exactly what years are we discussing for your friend? Are you talking completely prior to anything electronic? Or are we talking 1980s and older? Leaded gas only?
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