Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
How many of you have had a friend that you could consider family/been friends for years with, that has a spouse that has such an issue with you, that it could jeopardize the friendship? What have you tried to do to avoid it from destroying what you have with said friend, to the point where that friendship is beyond repair? One of my best friends who I consider a brother, has a wife that used to always be friends with me as well, but now has an issue with me. Long story short, she accused me of hooking up with someone close to her 2 years ago, and the only thing she has to back this crazy accusation up is because we were both checked in to the same bar for a band that was performing. (Ahhh, good old Facebook. ) She messaged me on Facebook about it cussing me out and then unfriended me. She also said she hated my political views, yet my views are similar to her husband's so I don't truly buy that one.
TBH OP, all this is just a slightly modified version of the same topic/situation from your other thread. The one you requested be closed. Wanted a do-over? Didn't like what you heard before? What's really going to change? You have the same audience and will probably get much of the same opinion/response.
TBH OP, all this is just a slightly modified version of the same topic/situation from your other thread. The one you requested be closed. Wanted a do-over? Didn't like what you heard before? What's really going to change? You have the same audience and will probably get much of the same opinion/response.
Quote:
Originally Posted by fluffythewondercat
Because he wasn’t “winning” in that one.
Actually no. I originally wasn't sure if this would be considered a non-relationship issue, or a relationship issue. It was originally moved after I thought it got deleted because I couldn't see it, so I made another one. I thought I saved my OP in Word but I didn't, so I recreated it as best I could. I was then told one of them had to be closed at my request, and the wrong one got closed.
It wasn't my spouse who is quite secure in his role as my sweetheart. It was his. My childhood friend of maybe twenty years at the time married and boom! That was the end of our very close brother-sister relationship.
I have no clue what set it off as I never asked and he never spoke to me until years later when he was divorced. They were invited to our home for dinner so we could get to know her better. The phone rang about an hour before they were expected to arrive and he said they wouldn't be able to come. I just read between the lines. How sad.
I do have one other male friend who has been a friend for sixty-five years. His wife died. When he started dating again I didn't hear much from him.
The long day we drove about 150 miles to visit a classmate who was dying of cancer she must have called six or seven times wanting to know when he was coming home! But things are settling back into a comfortable relationship as she gets to know me. Some women are just wary of these things and perhaps they have had bad experiences in the past.
How many of you have had a friend that you could consider family/been friends for years with, that has a spouse that has such an issue with you, that it could jeopardize the friendship? What have you tried to do to avoid it from destroying what you have with said friend, to the point where that friendship is beyond repair? One of my best friends who I consider a brother, has a wife that used to always be friends with me as well, but now has an issue with me. Long story short, she accused me of hooking up with someone close to her 2 years ago, and the only thing she has to back this crazy accusation up is because we were both checked in to the same bar for a band that was performing. (Ahhh, good old Facebook. ) She messaged me on Facebook about it cussing me out and then unfriended me. She also said she hated my political views, yet my views are similar to her husband's so I don't truly buy that one.
What cracks me up is that it was another friend of mine who had the idea to go! And not once did I even know her friend was at the venue, nor would I have cared! I have never done anything with this person, yet she has it in her head that I have. I have tried being the mature one in this situation, but nothing. I have given her space, tried reaching out to discuss it so that we can clear the air, and nothing works. Her husband knows I didn't do anything, and has told her to cut it out, but she refuses to listen to him. He also makes the minimal effort to nip this in the bud, and keeps telling me he wants no part of it. Normally I wouldn't care, but he lives in another state, so I don't get to see him that often. I visited him this year, and man did she make it uncomfortable for me. First day down there I was under the impression the 3 of us were getting lunch together. Yet she stormed in the house, took their daughter with her, and told my friend she was getting lunch with the baby, and that my presence ruined her day. She would call him and start fights with him cutting our nights short on the days we had planned to hangout, and even worse, made him cancel two of the days we planned to go to the beach and amusement park.
We keep in touch on the phone, but it's getting harder to do that now too. He only calls me if he is home by himself, or from his car if he is driving alone. If his wife is home, I can hear her making nasty remarks to both me and him, and he tells me he will have to call me later. Or he won't answer and will text me that he will call me when he's by himself. This guy is like a brother to me, but I honestly don't see this getting any better. I wish he would do more about this, yet he won't. You'd think his wife would be a bit more mature about this seeing as she is the mother of a 2 year old, but I guess even getting married and having kids doesn't always do that for people.
I don't understand this. What are the sexes of the players here? Are you female and expect a male friend's female wife to have no issues with you hanging out with her husband - and you're straight?
If so, forgettaboutit. If you're an ex-lover, absolutely forgettabout it.
Then, the wife of the male friend is absolutely right to defend her position. It's do or die when you're a female wife vs. female "friend" of husband or ex-lover of husband. No frickin way I'd be okay with that.
Just add alcohol is the joke - regarding ex-lovers and the likelihood of them hooking up again. Especially, if the female "friend" has come to town and supposedly just wants to do "friend" stuff.
Anyone who has been around the block knows exactly what the female "friend" is hoping will happen.
If the wife needs to act crazy to protect her position and family, then that's not actually crazy at all - it's strategy. And good for her, is what I say.
I had a friend once whose husband banned her from interacting with me. It was too threatening to their relationship because I was taking up too much of her time.
They were both Chinese. I don't know if the cultural stuff had anything to do with it. I had never heard of a husband being able to interfere like that before.
I don't understand this. What are the sexes of the players here? Are you female and expect a male friend's female wife to have no issues with you hanging out with her husband - and you're straight?
If so, forgettaboutit. If you're an ex-lover, absolutely forgettabout it.
Then, the wife of the male friend is absolutely right to defend her position. It's do or die when you're a female wife vs. female "friend" of husband or ex-lover of husband. No frickin way I'd be okay with that.
Just add alcohol is the joke - regarding ex-lovers and the likelihood of them hooking up again. Especially, if the female "friend" has come to town and supposedly just wants to do "friend" stuff.
Anyone who has been around the block knows exactly what the female "friend" is hoping will happen.
If the wife needs to act crazy to protect her position and family, then that's not actually crazy at all - it's strategy. And good for her, is what I say.
So, DK736, are you a male or a female?
That is a good question for you to answer.
And it does make a difference.
Last edited by snugglegirl05; 09-24-2019 at 07:44 PM..
There is probably a reason they wife doesn't like the friend. A reason we aren't really being told here.
You're likely right, but the Wife hasn't behaved in an adult fashion.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
) She messaged me on Facebook about it cussing me out and then unfriended me. She also said she hated my political views, yet my views are similar to her husband's so I don't truly buy that one.
