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Trespassing is illegal. You have proof of chronic trespassing taking place. If the boys or the parents won't honor your request, that the boys stay on their side of the property line, you can get the police involved.
More than a few kids these days for some reason seem to think they have the right to use their neighbors' yards as their own. I don't know where this mentality came from. And some parents actually back them up, by not observing the law or honoring the neighbors' request to keep their kids off neighboring properties. Sometimes, the parents even get angry with the neighbors, who complain about the trespassing. The world has changed in this regard; go figure. I don't understand it.
But the police do. And you have plenty of proof. Let us know how the issue turns out.
This happened in our neighborhood 25 years ago. 5 acre zoning and one day I came home to neighbor kids playing in our garage which I had left open as I was only away about an hour. My husband had rifles and power tools in there and the neighbor kids were playing with my daughters toys. I told the neighbor who was visiting the neighbor on the other side to please have his kids either go home or stay with him. He whined to the other neighbor and they got angry with me. Huh, what? He was divorced and living elsewhere but mom was still in family home. I felt bad for the kids but they were never given boundaries and always into mischief or worse having stated a small fire in another neighbors’ house. So, nothing new.
Wow! I always taught my kids that the ESSENCE of good manners and etiquette was to make the other person feel comfortable. For instance, if a person was more comfortable being called "Mr. Smith" then for goodness sakes call him that.
My kids grew up in a military family so we knew people and had people as neighbors from all over the world, literally. Some people preferred to be called "Mrs. Smith." Some people preferred to be called "Mary." Some people preferred to be called "Miss Mary." OK. When I taught my kids their manners, I always said "Default to Mr or Mrs So and So but remember - the key is for the OTHER person to feel comfortable, so if they ask you to call them something else, do it." Interestingly enough, my kids never got confused on that.
Some homes, you take your shoes off. Others - you don't. Look for visual clues (a pile of shoes or a shoe rack by a front door for instance, or the fact that your friend doesn't take his or her shoes off) and react accordingly. They can figure it out. It's not rocket science.
Congratulations on your new home, Kathryn!
Hope, that it will work out with your neighbors: you don’t have to be friends - I am sure you have plenty! (does not look likely- as your husband seems to have a hunch..).
Just being comfortable around them and cordial would be enough...
Y'all - it's ONE NEIGHBOR from what I can tell. Who just happens to live next door. And yes, we did drive around, talk to people, call the HOA president and talk with him, etc. before we bought the house. No - no one warned us about these oddities that seem to stem from one neighbor.
No, the home wasn't empty when we went under contract so I think this is a new development.
It's a youngish neighborhood, but we moved from an "oldish" neighborhood and we didn't particularly care to have so many older neighbors. We don't feel old - LOL. Oh and I did find out that yet another neighbor has moved in recently - they are both in their 50s too with no kids.
I'm ranting about it but I don't think it's that big of a deal actually - I just am surprised at the behavior. But believe me, I can get it under control - I think! Between the talks, sprinklers, and prickly plants (if necessary), I probably won't have to deal with kids in my driveway much longer. And I just am not going to put up with someone else's dog in my house, but I really don't care if it gets out and runs around the neighborhood.
The trash can thing - oh, I've got a plan for that. It might involve sprinklers too, now that I'm thinking about it! LOL
Congratulations on your new home, Kathryn!
Hope, that it will work out with your neighbors: you don’t have to be friends - I am sure you have plenty! (does not look likely- as your husband seems to have a hunch..).
Just being comfortable around them and cordial would be enough...
I agree with the above. I would try to maintain a cordial distance and present any complaints in a low key, non-threatening way. If the kids get it in for you they can make your day to day life very unpleasant.
I agree with the above. I would try to maintain a cordial distance and present any complaints in a low key, non-threatening way. If the kids get it in for you they can make your day to day life very unpleasant.
Right. I do not want this to devolve into some sort of "pissing contest" with my neighbors. I just want to be cordial.
Though if someone starts moving my trash can again, I admit I like the idea of turning on the sprinklers. That's really over the top!
I hope things settle down for you in your new home. It's frustrating to have neighbors who don't teach their kids to respect other people's property.
Two homes ago we lived in an older neighborhood with no HOA. Next door was a rental. First neighbors were good, then next 3 were horrible and then the owners had family move in and we loved those people.
We had an issue with one family with small children, the kids would ride their bikes up and down our driveway, which would set our dogs off barking. Every. Single. Time. I finally had to tell them to stay out of our yard. These kids also climbed around on the roof of the house they lived in and when I told them to get down, they told me they could do what they wanted (mom was pregnant with kid number 4 and slept all the time). The boys were 6 & 8 and the little girl was about 3. The little girl fell off their fence and broke both wrists (again mom was napping while all three were outside unsupervised). She also came over and walked in my front door. Fortunately my dogs were good with kids, but I was holding them back while pushing her back out the door. The police picked up the 8 year old 2 miles away on a busy road. He'd walked that far, crossing roads with heavy traffic. At that point, CPS took the kids away. When they moved out (without notice to the landlord) and stopped paying for water and electric, they would come and stay every once in a while because they were still paying rent. Anyhow, the landlord eventually had to gut the interior of the house. There was garbage everywhere, including every closet packed with dirty diapers and pails full of human waste.
We were so thankful to have the last neighbors who moved in. They cried when we moved because I think we were the first good neighbors they had ever had, too.
So there is definitely a trade off in living with an HOA and not living with one. We live in a neighborhood with covenants, but we have no HOA. There are about 15 homes and the neighbors would have to enforce the covenants if anyone was blatantly violating them, but it appears that most of us keep our yards and houses up and don't mind if there are goats or chickens in peoples' back yards (we are in a rural area).
Put down fertilizer on your lawn, then tell the neighbor that the kids can't walk on it because it is poisonous until it next rains a few times. Maybe add in some comments bout how they are being a bit destructive to the grass. That might get the message across without seeming like you are a cranky difficult person.
You probably can't post "No Trespassing" signs on your property, but for liability reasons, if you tell the parents to keep the kids out of your yard, and they continue, then escalate and send them a certified letter to cover your butt in case anyone gets hurt (of course your neighbors will then hate you!).
There are clear laws about trespassing. If they choose to break the law, the authorities need be involved. If a neighbor disrespects you to the point your valid demand regarding trespassing is ignored, really it is pointless to send letters or attempt to further reason with them. It is like a barking dog issue, tell them once and they ignore, then call animal control. They almost always stop the behavior when authorities are involved. And remember, they drew "first blood", you are in the right.
We have gotten what I call 'seasonal damage' or 'seasonal disrespect'. Like spring break our outside water spout was left turned on. Good thing that outside one makes a big noise inside the house. Getting into people's sheds and in garages via side doors more to poke around than anything else. The very old trick of setting a paper bag on fire on my neighbor's porch...and those older people were just glad they had not taken their meds and gone to bed yet. In general, nothing bigger except for one teenaged boy who was stealing from cars for a series of months even beyond vacation times.
Last edited by petsandgardens; 10-31-2019 at 09:27 AM..
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