Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
This is my English class discussion topic. If you living in USA, please answer to my question.
1-Describe relationship between children and parents.(when they are 12-20 and 20-40)
2-Describe relationship between cousins.(when they are 12-20 and 20-40)
3-Describe relationship between children and grandparents.
If you want, you can answer to this question about yourself.
I think he's Iranian wanting to know about AMericans...
C-P 12 -20, relationships vary according to how good your parents are.
C-P 20-40 some parents pay for your college, others don't. Seems like white people tend to kick their kids outs of the house after college. Other races, kids stay at home until they can move out.
Hi, Davud. We're happy to help. A few questions for you...
There's really no single kind of relationship in the United States. American families tend to be more unstructured that families in Iran. This is a product of many factors, from an emphasis on independence in children upon reaching adulthood, the prevalence of divorce, and the belief that elderly parents should have financial freedom as long as possible. Also, in the United States, it is not uncommon for children to leave their families and start their own lives hundreds or even thousands of miles away from their homes.
in some ways, this is a positive thing, for men and women are typically able to care for themselves. Women in particular are able to enjoy financial autonomy without being too reliant on their husbands. In fact, if you suggested that women were required to stay at home and tend to children, and you would be laughed at in many quarters. Yes, there are trade-offs, but almost all women wouldn't have it any other way.
The relationship between children 12-20 and their parents really depends on the strictness of the household. However, I would offer that there is not a rigid family structure in the United States, so there's not truly a paternalistic relationship where the father speaks and the children obey.
The relationship between children and cousin also depends on the closeness of the families in question. On my mother's side, we stay relatively close to our cousins, while on my father's side, we hardly know our cousins at all. In fact, I probably would not recognize them on the street, chiefly because my father and my aunt lived so far apart.
The same is true between children and grandparents. In some families, it is very close. In other families, there is a good deal of distance.
Hope this helps you in your project. Good luck, and please don't hesitate to ask further questions.
1-Describe relationship between children and parents.(when they are 12-20 and 20-40)
Most teens and young adults struggle with their parents to achieve independence. Typically they are somewhat rebellious, but for the most part it is a loving relationship.
As young adults establish themselves in their own lives, the relationships improve, but parents still treat their children like children and often provide advice, whether it is wanted or not.
I have a friend who is an Iranian living in America. His father lives with him. That is not the norm for American families. But because the father does not drive and does not speak English well, he needs to live with his son. His father gives him a lot of unwanted advice, too. I think it makes it difficult to date women. As an American woman, I never knew what the father thought of me and felt a little uncomfortable. He was always a very gracious host and very kind.
2-Describe relationship between cousins.(when they are 12-20 and 20-40)
When we are children, our cousins are often our favorite playmates. When we become adults, we do not see each other as much because we are so busy with work and our own families.
3-Describe relationship between children and grandparents.
Grandparents tend to have strong bonds with their grandchildren when they are young. We usually find it easier to express our love for our grandparents than for our parents because they are not as strict with us as our parents are. As we grow older, many grandchildren maintain close ties to their grandparents though they do not have much time to spend with them.
As an adult, I help care for my grandfather, and live nearby. This was a choice I made because my parents live far away. Not many Americans have the time or the opportunity to help care for their grandparents. He is still able to live by himself, but would probably be happier living with family. He is very lonely.
I found it difficult living with my grandfather because I did not have the freedom to do what I wanted when I wanted to, without telling him what my plans were. So I got my own place to live and feel much happier.
Americans love their families, for the most part, but they prefer to live in separate homes, and often far away, in other cities, so they can maintain their independence.
To sum it up, in my opinion, most Americans value their independence from their families. They still love them, but don't want to live with them unless they have to.
[LEFT]Thanks cpg35223 and ellie for descriptive answer , and thanks other, and when you have very close relationship with grandparent, You have a face-to-face interview every week or every day or….?[/LEFT]
[LEFT]Thanks cpg35223 and ellie for descriptive answer , and thanks other, and when you have very close relationship with grandparent, You have a face-to-face interview every week or every day or….?[/LEFT]
This is my English class discussion topic. If you living in USA, please answer to my question.
1-Describe relationship between children and parents.(when they are 12-20 and 20-40)
2-Describe relationship between cousins.(when they are 12-20 and 20-40)
3-Describe relationship between children and grandparents.
If you want, you can answer to this question about yourself.
Thank You,
Davud from Neyshabur, Iran
Davud in America good parents understand that after about the age of 12 it is time to transition away from being a disciplinarian to becoming a mentor to their child.
Our ultimate job as parents is to guide our children toward being self-disciplined young adults. When there has been a good loving, disciplined foundation of mutual respect this transitioning goes fairly smoothly.
However, when parents are not good parents but are more selfish and do not lead by example in living their lives the kids tend to not respect the parents and the relationship grows more distant in the teenage years. 12-20 year old struggle more in making bad choices when they do not respect their parents or have good relationships with the adults in their lives. Children who have loving relationships with their parents are usually more focused on finishing their educations and becoming successful in life.
From 20-40 in America "kids" are building their own lives and seeking independence. Given our current economic climate, some adult "children" move back in with their parents when they can't make ends meet on their own. So I guess you could say families are living together more often as adults than any other time in the last 50 years at least.
As far as extended family goes (cousins and grandparents) - Americans have been very transitional over the last 50 years and move around the country a lot for the best jobs and quality of life. This means that sometimes you are very far in distance from the cousins and grandparents. Many people travel to be with those distant family members on our holidays like Christmas or Easter. Grandparents who are retired and financially secure travel at other times of the year by plane, car or train to visit their children and grandchildren for a week or two at a time. In my case for instance, my parents travel about 900 miles to see us about 3 times a year and we travel to see them once, sometimes twice a year.
[LEFT]Thanks cpg35223 and ellie for descriptive answer , and thanks other, and when you have very close relationship with grandparent, You have a face-to-face interview every week or every day or….?[/LEFT]
Hi, Davud...it really depends on how close.
The word "interview" is too formal. I don't know if your use of that word is intentional, but it presumes a far more patriarchal relationship than is typical in American families. Grandfathers tend to be more of a loving presence in American society, and less of a "head of the family" role.
Also, because American families tend to move a lot from city to city, it is often quite difficult for Americans to see their grandparents on a daily, weekly, or even monthly basis.
and when you have very close relationship with grandparent, You have a face-to-face interview every week or every day or….?
I grew up in a different state than my grandparents, I got to spend a couple week a year with them in the summer. I spend every weekend with my 2 grandkids and see them more if I get the opportunity.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
