Relative has gone completely mute at family affairs (males, family holidays, brother)
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Are you uncomfortable with people who never speak? I am, and it seems weird and threatening. I have two different relatives on different sides of the family who show up to family events and never say a word to anyone. No smiles, no nods no non verbal communication at all. They just sit there and put in their time. It is like they are not there. Everyone is talking around them and nothing at all comes out of their mouth.
They are in their forties are white males, college educated and speak English as their first language.
Would this be a sign of mental illness? Or is it a deep seeded anger? These two are not shy, or are they quiet, they are completely mute. I know they can talk because they use to years ago. No one seems to bring them up or complain about them, they are maybe to embarrassed. Many they do not exist and I am slowly going insane.
Would someone like this make you uncomfortable? I have tried to engage them in conversation but just get a dirty stare.
Last edited by Weekend Traveler; 06-04-2009 at 03:36 PM..
Are you uncomfortable with people who never speak? I am, and it seems weird and threatening. I have two different relatives on different sides of the family who show up to family events and never say a word to anyone. No smiles, no nods no non verbal communication at all. They just sit there and put in their time. It is like they are not there. Everyone is talking around them and nothing at all comes out of their mouth.
Would this be a sign of mental illness? Or is it a deep seeded anger? These two are not shy, or are they quiet, they are completely mute. I know they can talk because they use to years ago. No one seems to bring them up or complain about them, they are maybe to embarrassed. Many they do not exist and I am slowly going insane.
Would someone like this make you uncomfortable? I have tried to engage them in conversation but just get a dirty stare.
They are better than the funeral relatives, traveler.
I found some of my uncles at my dad's funeral bed, those I hadn't seen in 15 years.
I hae felt like this in some circles. If you've tried and tried to be part of the gang and continually go unvalued eventually you sort of shut down.
So what's the family role in this? Did anyone ever sincerely care about these two? If not one ever did, even when they were younger, then their response is correct.
If you are willing to really take on the responsiblity of having a long term relationship should you ever get them to "come back" keep trying. If you are only trying to satisfy your curiousity, quit. If you get them to open up and them drop them like everyone else you are only putting another nail in the coffin.
Are you uncomfortable with people who never speak? I am, and it seems weird and threatening. I have two different relatives on different sides of the family who show up to family events and never say a word to anyone. No smiles, no nods no non verbal communication at all. They just sit there and put in their time. It is like they are not there. Everyone is talking around them and nothing at all comes out of their mouth.
They are in their forties are white males, college educated and speak English as their first language.
Would this be a sign of mental illness? Or is it a deep seeded anger? These two are not shy, or are they quiet, they are completely mute. I know they can talk because they use to years ago. No one seems to bring them up or complain about them, they are maybe to embarrassed. Many they do not exist and I am slowly going insane.
Would someone like this make you uncomfortable? I have tried to engage them in conversation but just get a dirty stare.
Sounds like they just don't want to be there. I wouldn't worry about them or go out of my way to make them feel welcomed because they don't put in the effort. I say f**k 'em!
My brother in law is like this. He doesn't speak to anyone at family holidays. But, he also just disappears after a little while, so he is not just sitting their mute. I tried to talk with him a few times, but only got cold silence. It is strange.
Are you uncomfortable with people who never speak? I am, and it seems weird and threatening. I have two different relatives on different sides of the family who show up to family events and never say a word to anyone. No smiles, no nods no non verbal communication at all. They just sit there and put in their time. It is like they are not there. Everyone is talking around them and nothing at all comes out of their mouth.
They are in their forties are white males, college educated and speak English as their first language.
Would this be a sign of mental illness? Or is it a deep seeded anger? These two are not shy, or are they quiet, they are completely mute. I know they can talk because they use to years ago. No one seems to bring them up or complain about them, they are maybe to embarrassed. Many they do not exist and I am slowly going insane.
Would someone like this make you uncomfortable? I have tried to engage them in conversation but just get a dirty stare.
You sure youre not in my family.
I have this cousin who is 21 years old. He just grunts at me. I do not think he has ever said a sentence to me in 20 years of family visits. Acouple years ago, I tried talking to him. {he treats my brother like crap too and doesnt talk to anyone else} and he just grunted at me. I said how are you like college. He has never dated either, and went home every weekend, and doesnt even have one friend. I am the biggest nerd on the planet {Fat, bookworm} and even I had friends in college to go hang out with. Sheesh! Him and his brother and sister, will come to mother's house, eat the food, or used to go to grandmothers, and just SIT AND STARE. But at least the brother and sister will smile, give a few answers to you when asked, he won't, he will just give you dirty look. He is huge too, like 6 foot 6 and 400lbs. {Im not small myself but he towers over me}
I think he is schizoid or something, or maybe he is just a creep. I sometimes wonder does he go home to call friends up, or does he act like this all the time. I do not see him getting a job but somehow he got through college. I think you have to talk a little to get through college dont you? especially for a business degree?
Are you uncomfortable with people who never speak? I am, and it seems weird and threatening. I have two different relatives on different sides of the family who show up to family events and never say a word to anyone. No smiles, no nods no non verbal communication at all. They just sit there and put in their time. It is like they are not there. Everyone is talking around them and nothing at all comes out of their mouth.
They are in their forties are white males, college educated and speak English as their first language.
Would this be a sign of mental illness? Or is it a deep seeded anger? These two are not shy, or are they quiet, they are completely mute. I know they can talk because they use to years ago. No one seems to bring them up or complain about them, they are maybe to embarrassed. Many they do not exist and I am slowly going insane.
Would someone like this make you uncomfortable? I have tried to engage them in conversation but just get a dirty stare.
leave them be.
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