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Old 06-13-2009, 04:47 PM
 
Location: In my skin
9,229 posts, read 16,591,460 times
Reputation: 9175

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I'm having a bit of a challenge with my little sister. It seems she has had the impression that I was avoiding her and some of the family, claims I had a distant tone with her about a year ago, that it rubbed off on my son and there was something going on that we have been hiding from everyone. I have absolutely NO idea what she is talking about, but she seems to have let her imagination run wild and now the family thinks there is some big secret I have been keeping. I have no energy for my family's incessant need for drama, but it is an annoying habit that many people have.

How many of you have heard these:

"I thought you didn't like me." when you have never even MET the person before.

"I thought you were mad at me." when there was never a problem.

"You didn't seem too excited, so I figured you didn't want me there." I wouldn't invite people I DON'T want to be there.

"You said (one thing) but I know you really meant (something else)."
Now you're calling me a liar.

Nails on a chalkboard.

Just had to vent.
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Old 06-13-2009, 05:10 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,831 posts, read 88,354,003 times
Reputation: 22814
"Just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean they're not after you!"

I've used similar statements and they've been right on the money, I should say. Call me intuitive or paranoid, your choice, but that's the way it is.
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Old 06-13-2009, 07:52 PM
 
Location: Delaware...Oi
1,293 posts, read 3,195,976 times
Reputation: 547
Quote:
Originally Posted by sierraAZ View Post
"Just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean they're not after you!"

I've used similar statements and they've been right on the money, I should say. Call me intuitive or paranoid, your choice, but that's the way it is.

They're NOT?!

Eh, I've gotten that sometimes, people reading far too deeply into what actions, reactions, lack of action(s), or how you might say something. In most instances it's meaningless, but they take it offensively or they've just seen to many movies or shows and want to analyze every little thing done or said so they can Dr. Phil it up.

Some, like you're parents or something are simply picking up on things you might not be voicing directly or the like, but it's usually the sibling or chatty-cathy co-worker I've usually noted for it.
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Old 06-13-2009, 08:45 PM
 
Location: In bucolic TN
1,706 posts, read 3,322,560 times
Reputation: 2413
Some people can't stay in the overt, this-is-really-the-way-it-is. They do more 'psychologizing' of others than a true therapist. It sickens me and I stay away from them. They typically have too many needs for control, feel powerless, and want an upper hand, no matter what it takes. If you keep asking if I'm angry, I'll get angry and fulfill your pitiful expectation.

Lead me far, far, far away from people like this. People who have intuition can typically support it with clarity if they think hard enough. Intuition is a summary of experiences, thoughts, and feelings that give you direction and movement. People who have something under their skin are just irritating.
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Old 06-13-2009, 09:35 PM
 
Location: NYC
37 posts, read 85,066 times
Reputation: 38
Quote:
Originally Posted by PassTheChocolate View Post
How many of you have heard these:

"I thought you didn't like me." when you have never even MET the person before.

"I thought you were mad at me." when there was never a problem.

"You didn't seem too excited, so I figured you didn't want me there." I wouldn't invite people I DON'T want to be there.

"You said (one thing) but I know you really meant (something else)."
Now you're calling me a liar.
THESE things have happened to me lately n i just tell them wht i really meant and tht they read me wrong. And if they go on sayin "But i know you ur not usually like this in those situations, you would hve said/did sometin else" i say, Im sorry i gave the wrong signals/impressions, i dont really remember(i really dont) n im sorry. So if they cant take in wht im sayin then im sorry! too bad!!!!!!
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Old 06-14-2009, 12:32 AM
 
18,257 posts, read 14,490,858 times
Reputation: 12991
Well since they have known you since childhood, these people assume they can read you. If you have been behaving different, then its logical to think you are not spilling your guts about something. Maybe they are reading into you what you haven't accepted to yourself yet. Sometimes our bodies and actions tell people who know us the truth while we aren't even thinking of the truth, only because we don't know it yet. Because it hasn't reached our consciousness. But its in there somewhere, in the subconscious.

Maybe this is the case with you, maybe not. A little self examining and a talk with your sister about what exactly SHE thinks you might be hiding, will open up the truth a little more. She might even be projecting her own mentality unto you. Perhaps SHE is the one hiding something. A little digging might pay off.
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Old 06-14-2009, 03:48 AM
 
Location: I never said I was perfect so no refunds here sorry!
6,489 posts, read 7,203,192 times
Reputation: 29856
Guilty...guilty.....guilty.......just fess up and get it over
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Old 06-14-2009, 04:33 AM
 
Location: St. Joseph Area
6,233 posts, read 9,503,582 times
Reputation: 3133
It's never happened TO me, but I've observed my parents thinking this way about other people, thinking that while they say something to your face, they really mean something else. I really don't understand it.
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Old 06-14-2009, 05:37 AM
 
Location: Grosse Ile Michigan
30,701 posts, read 80,132,372 times
Reputation: 39477
Some people need drama in their lives. If there isn't any, they create it
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Old 06-14-2009, 03:06 PM
 
18,257 posts, read 14,490,858 times
Reputation: 12991
Quote:
Originally Posted by Coldjensens View Post
Some people need drama in their lives. If there isn't any, they create it


Yeah. And some people love to create chaos. If your sister does this with other people then you know thats what shes doing to you.
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