I read this article in the Island Gazette online (Carolina Beach) several years ago. I liked it so much, I saved it to my computer.
Ohldepharte For June 27th, 2001
Posted Monday, July 2, 2001
By Terry Moore
When I used to live back in Yankeeland, if a gal I didn’t know smiled at me, I figured either she was a hooker or my fly was unzipped.
Later on, when I traveled to Wilmington and Charleston quite a bit, I noticed lots and lots of women smiling at me.
They couldn’t all be hookers, I thought, so there must be some other reason. Maybe they’re just being pleasant and cheerful.
Unaccustomed to that kind of behavior from Northern gals, I found I rather liked it.
When I flew down here from Cleveland or Pittsburgh, I’d notice the difference as soon as I got into the airline terminal – women were pleasant and gracious – they’d actually even talk to me. It was weird. Maybe they were on drugs.
I probably should have known about this Southern charm thing with the women down here – I went to college in the South. I tried dating Southern girls, and they were delightful, but they were always two steps ahead of me, so I never got to first base.
I gave up on them and went back to dating Northern girls. They were sort of mean and hostile, but they were predictable and I understood them. They didn’t smile much, though.
Come to think of it, I wonder if Southern gals smile at other women the same way they smile at men, and if they do, does it mean the same thing? I suspect I’ll never find out – but I digress.
Why, then, do all the Southern Belles lay that Mona Lisa look an all us poor, helpless fellers? Probably it’s a cultural thing – a heritage from the good old days before the crazy, radical ideas of education, thinking and voting *****ed up women’s lives and cursed them with liberation.
Yes, those beautiful smiles probably stem from the good old plantation days when there wasn’t much else for a young lady to do but be charming and make pretty for the menfolk.
They attained fulfillment by making their men happy and feeling good about themselves.
Chances are, when their mammas gave them that coming-of-age talk, it went something like, "Look, Honeychile – you ain’t too smart and you ain’t all that pretty, so you’re gonna have to smile a whole bunch if you expect to land a man, ‘cause the competition is fierce out there."
Taking their mammas’ words to heart, Southern ladies learned that it doesn’t really matter all that much what they say, as long as they dazzle and bewitch guys with their beautiful smiles.
Unfortunately, this resulted in a traditional male characteristic – failure to listen to what females say – which may account for why all that make-nice training gets flushed down the commode after the gals are married – at least, as far as their husbands are concerned.
I have to admit, though, that I’ve learned to cherish and appreciate this marvelous attitude of the Southern female toward men.
And it’s not just superficial. Gals down here just seem to want to be nice to the bumbling male animal and help us out whenever they can.
For example, if I’m in the supermarket, and I’m standing there in the aisle looking confused or puzzled about something like what kind of laundry detergent to buy, chances are good that some wonderful Southern lady will stop and ask me if I need help, or maybe she’ll make a suggestion.
In the same situation up North, some gal would probably yell, "Get the hell out of the way, Mac, or I’ll run you down with my cart."
That’s if you’re lucky – some women just send their kids out to bite you in the leg.
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I hope it was okay to share that, moderators.
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