Ticketed on I81 for Speed and Window Tint (Harrisonburg, Shenandoah: lawyers, school)

[spencgr]

Originally Posted by ChristineVA

Bigfoot--

Thank you for your input on this. I am hoping that once I get the ticket it will make more sense. He was pulled over trying to read it all to me and I told him to just forget it and get moving. I agree that it doesn't make sense about what he said about "giving him a break because he was being polite." I didn't detect much of a "break" either but he said something about "not suspending his license."

At this point, the real hard part will be finding a good attorney, which all I have to go on is the internet.

Originally Posted by Bigfoot424

Can I assume you are not the parent of a grown child? And yes, I mean child cause even though he's a college student he's still a kid in the eyes of the parents.

No, not a parent. But I would assume they always remain a child in a parent's eyes, no matter the age; and that doesn't end with a diploma.

But this specific incident is a perfect chance to teach some basic life skills. I received a ticket for underage drinking at age 19. My parents were completely hands off. I figured it out and had no long lasting ill repurcussions.

I did learn, though. Might not of if my parents took care of it.

[spencgr]

]

Originally Posted by Bigfoot424

Can I assume you are not the parent of a grown child? And yes, I mean child cause even though he's a college student he's still a kid in the eyes of the parents.

No, not a parent. But I would assume they always remain a child in a parent's eyes, no matter the age; and that doesn't end with a diploma.

But this specific incident is a perfect chance to teach some basic life skills. I received a ticket for underage drinking at age 19. My parents were completely hands off. I figured it out and had no long lasting ill repurcussions.

I did learn, though. Might not of if my parents took care of it.

[ChristineVA]

Originally Posted by spencgr

No, not a parent. But I would assume they always remain a child in a parent's eyes, no matter the age; and that doesn't end with a diploma.

But this specific incident is a perfect chance to teach some basic life skills. I received a ticket for underage drinking at age 19. My parents were completely hands off. I figured it out and had no long lasting ill repurcussions.

I did learn, though. Might not of if my parents took care of it.

Funny, my older child got an underage in college (she may have been 18 or 19). I had nothing to do with and she handled the whole thing on her own. It also didn't have a $2500 fine and attorney fees involved. Additionally, her college intervened on that one and put anyone who got one of those into some program that sort of took care of everything, so it was parenting in a way.

At 21 I was married and living in another country, so I get what you are trying to say here.

He's a good kid and has never had one ounce of trouble in his life but I'm probably not going to let him decide to pick an attorney without me vetting it. I'm also not going to let him hang out to dry because he doesn't have the funds to take care of this in 4 weeks time.

[Ffxdata]

Originally Posted by ChristineVA

I suppose I could just wash my hands of it and let him figure it all out, money and all.

This. You aren't doing him any favors. He got himself into a jam, and he can get himself out of it. He is not sitting in jail. He hasn't gotten kicked out of school. This is a small thing in the grand scheme of things. I'm not even a tough love type. You should definitely look up snowplow parenting though.

https://www.bostonglobe.com/arts/201...xUP/story.html

[Ffxdata]

Originally Posted by ChristineVA

Funny, my older child got an underage in college (she may have been 18 or 19). I had nothing to do with and she handled the whole thing on her own. It also didn't have a $2500 fine and attorney fees involved. Additionally, her college intervened on that one and put anyone who got one of those into some program that sort of took care of everything, so it was parenting in a way.

At 21 I was married and living in another country, so I get what you are trying to say here.

He's a good kid and has never had one ounce of trouble in his life but I'm probably not going to let him decide to pick an attorney without me vetting it. I'm also not going to let him hang out to dry because he doesn't have the funds to take care of this in 4 weeks time.

What you are literally saying is that you don't have faith that your son can make intelligent or thought out decisions by himself. Even though your daughter did. Even though you did at his age.

[ChristineVA]

OK, everyone. I'm out.

I see this it turning into your typical internet pile on regarding what superior parents you are.

It's really none of your business if I look up lawyers on the internet, he looks them up, we both look them up this evening etc.

Continue on with all lecturing and holier-than-thou parenting if it makes you feel good though...you people are ridiculous. LOL.

[The Dissenter]

Originally Posted by ChristineVA

Funny, my older child got an underage in college (she may have been 18 or 19). I had nothing to do with and she handled the whole thing on her own. It also didn't have a $2500 fine and attorney fees involved. Additionally, her college intervened on that one and put anyone who got one of those into some program that sort of took care of everything, so it was parenting in a way.

At 21 I was married and living in another country, so I get what you are trying to say here.

He's a good kid and has never had one ounce of trouble in his life but I'm probably not going to let him decide to pick an attorney without me vetting it. I'm also not going to let him hang out to dry because he doesn't have the funds to take care of this in 4 weeks time.

I think others are forgetting that there is a possibility of him getting his license suspended, then how is he going to get back to school? That will cost him and you more $$ down the line. While I think you should and will hold him responsible for this mistake, he is still a dependent and a little intervention is not a bad thing to keep a stupid mistake (though a questionable law magnifies that mistake) from turning into a major hassle for him and you.

[Carlingtonian]

This is a pretty interesting firsthand account of an automotive journalist's experience getting an RD ticket in Rapahannock County, for which he did a weekend in jail: Never Speed In Virginia: Lessons From My Three Days In Jail

A few weeks later my lawyer met with the prosecutor. He told me Rappahannock County, where I was cited, has a new judge who doesn’t take kindly to speeders. The old judge had a Porsche and a sense of humor, he said; this new one didn’t, and he’s yelled at the prosecutor before for cutting “sweetheart” deals for people who go over 90. Even if my lawyer and the prosecutor had worked out a deal with light penalties, the judge was likely to reject it.

The best plea deal I got was a fine of about $400 with court costs, a 10-day suspension of my license in Virginia, and three days in jail. The judge has an option of giving one day in jail for every mile an hour over 90 mph, and he would exercise it here.

What's interesting is that he received a much worse punishment than it seems he would've in Fairfax County. If you look in the Virginia Courts site and search by county, you can see the various infractions and what sentences resulted.

https://eapps.courts.state.va.us/gdc...ge=welcomePage

On the lefthand menu, go to "Case Status Information" and choose from "Harrisonburg/Rockingham" from the pulldown list of courts. Since you can't search by type of offense, you can search for a common surname.

E.g., I searched under "Smith" and found one person found guilty in absentia in 2011 for doing over 80 in a 55. Sentence: No jail, no suspension, $150.00 fine plus court costs of $81.00.

[Bigfoot424]

Big difference in cases here. This guy was a complete moron and the road he was on has killed people to include a friend of mine. This case is much different.

[Carlingtonian]

Originally Posted by Bigfoot424

Big difference in cases here. This guy was a complete moron and the road he was on has killed people to include a friend of mine. This case is much different.

Sorry to hear that. Good to know her son won't likely get the same punishment.