Northern Virginia vs Raleigh?

[The Dissenter]

Originally Posted by Relocate88

Hello, I'm an AA single female thinking of a move to either Northern Virginia or the Raleigh suburbs from Massachusetts and was just curious to know what people's personal experiences are living in either city especially for "northern transplants" and/or people of color.


I've done a decent amount of research on a variety of things for both areas, and I'm mainly interested in hearing how welcoming (or not) people are in either area and your personal experience living in either location,(socially: making friends,dating scene, people's overall friendliness/welcoming to new comers ect..., drivers: like high or low road rage?, and on the job: your experience especially as a northerner or person of color in that environment.) I realize no place is perfect but I'm just interested in knowing which area would be better overall.

Thanks in advance!

I figured since I’ve been in NC for half a month and have some sample size, I can report more on this debate.

I live in Durham but have done a couple of meetups in Raleigh. The slower pace of life is very noticeable and people are more approachable than NoVA. The dating scene has been pretty promising so far. I don’t think the Northern transplant thing would be a thing at all. I think socially Raleigh is a better move. Career wise Northern VA is the move.

[Nomad1320]

Originally Posted by Bigfoot424

I have to chuckle at posts like these. I lived in NOVA from 73 until moving to the Shen Valley in 2015. While I do not miss the traffic and other issues that come with highly populated area we still had great neighbors and our kids both received good educations. Our daughter has been in NC for about 14 years now and while she misses VA she has all her friends in NC otherwise she would come back here. So exactly why do you have such an issue in NOVA?

So I've lived in 5 states prior to VA. And I have felt each was more open and friendly than NOVA. Maybe a lot has changed in just the 4 or so years since you moved? Maybe I've just lived in very friendly states? But since I'm bored I will jot a few specific things down...

1. Overpriced, not just housing but just about everything.
2. Schools are good but overrated, no offense to anyone but from our family's perspective we'd pick most of the other systems our children have been in over LCPS. Decisions are based on politics more than the benefit of the student at the district level. And as not to not hijack the thread I will stop there.
3. Speaking of politics...politics, I'll leave it at that, again not wanting to hijack.
4. For being the most affluent county in the country we are surprised about the lack of shopping, personally I don't care but for the rest of the family it drives them crazy. And yes Tyson's corner, everyone can stop typing, that's 45 minutes from the center of Loudoun. Closer in you basically have Dulles Town Center which is one step in the grave and some big box retailers all pretty much low end. Compared to other high market suburbs there's nothing here.
5. Comparatively poor restaurant selections, yes I know someone will bring up one of their favorites, but again, compared to other similar areas the selection is thin.
6. Don't find people especially outgoing or friendly. Not saying people are mean but the area is a lot more..."close to the vest" than other areas we've lived in. Maybe it's the commute, maybe its the number of government employees, maybe it because it's so transient, I don't know. Apologies to those Fed's in the area I appreciate everything you do for us but I'm not sure if an FBI agent is typically considered the joker in the group ;-) Honestly, I think I've found it easier to strike up a conversation in a NYC pizza place that at my kid's baseball game. People here simply seem to be a lot more hesitant to let loose and laugh.
7. It's very...vanilla. Like, what was that movie...The Truman Show?

So to bring it back to what the OP asked, In my opinion (that's what all these posts are) I wouldn't think twice about picking NC over VA unless a job specifically was influencing my decision. And even then I would look hard at if it was worth it.

[Racks]

I am a Raleigh native (Wake County own in Brier Creek), single, female and will be relocating to NoVA (Falls Church) for a federal job. Simply put - the wages in Raleigh are falling short of keeping pace with the cost of living and taxes. I am getting a 70% pay bump to change jobs. Raleigh is great if you are retired, own property and have fixed income but if you're in your early 30s and building a career it's very difficult to find six-figure jobs here in the public sector.

[Hello123001]

Originally Posted by Bigfoot424

I have to chuckle at posts like these. I lived in NOVA from 73 until moving to the Shen Valley in 2015. While I do not miss the traffic and other issues that come with highly populated area we still had great neighbors and our kids both received good educations. Our daughter has been in NC for about 14 years now and while she misses VA she has all her friends in NC otherwise she would come back here. So exactly why do you have such an issue in NOVA?

I don't understand it either... Both my daughter and I had an active social group, and I'm a big believer in mental health days for mom, so while she did sleepovers at her friends, I did wine tasting or dinner with friends, most of who were younger than I and even single. I also had elderly retired friends and married friends, all walks of life. So I never felt this NOVA freeze and I moved as recent as August this year.