NOVA or Seattle...anyone have advice? (Arlington: renting, insurance, home) - Northern Virginia - Virginia - City-Data Forum

MJ1983 · 02-27-2010, 06:05 PM

OK, so me and my husband are originally from Seattle but moved to Arlington 4 years ago for him to attend grad school. We were both very lucky to land jobs in the career field that we love. We are now in our mid/late 20's and trying to decide if we want to move back or not. The pacific NW is in a horrible economic position - and with me being in education and my husband in politics...the jobs are here! BUT....Both of our families are back in the Seattle area, and I mean every member of our families - we are literally out here on our own

So, do you choose career or family? I really don't think we will be able to have both. If we were to move, the likelihood of us both finding jobs (let alone careers that we are passionate about) is pretty low. But if we stay here, will we be miserable because we are so far away from family?

Ahhh!!! This question is driving us nuts! We are ready to move on with our lives - buy a place and start a family - but we can't until we really "settle down."

Anyone been in a similar position?

movingtodcfromseattle · 02-27-2010, 07:05 PM

Have you thought about staying here for a few more years and moving later? We moved from Seattle (lived there 30+ years) this past summer to NOVA and all of our family is there too. It is hard, but with great technology (FB, Skype, etc) we are able to stay in close contact. I talk to my sister the same amount now as I did when I was there. I would definitely NOT move back to Seattle expecting to land a job in education (also in education myself). These decisions are very difficult to make.

Guamanians · 02-27-2010, 07:49 PM

Maybe you (both) can make some calls back to Seattle and see if there are any jobs you could get. I would say that family is very important, but you shouldn't move back there W/O a job. Until then you might as well enjoy it here.... Good luck

MJ1983 · 02-27-2010, 07:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by movingtodcfromseattle

Have you thought about staying here for a few more years and moving later? We moved from Seattle (lived there 30+ years) this past summer to NOVA and all of our family is there too. It is hard, but with great technology (FB, Skype, etc) we are able to stay in close contact. I talk to my sister the same amount now as I did when I was there. I would definitely NOT move back to Seattle expecting to land a job in education (also in education myself). These decisions are very difficult to make.

Yeah, we have thought about staying here for a few more years until the economy gets better, but I hate having things up in the air and not feeling "settled." I really just want to finally be where we are going to "be." We have had the intention of moving back for the past couple of years, but recently we have really been thinking about whether or not that is a good idea for our careers/finances. Plus we want to start a family, and that would be impossible if we move, can't find jobs and don't have insurance.

Do you mind me asking why you moved out here? Based on your experiences in Seattle, are there any jobs for counselors and people in the political (liberal) field?

movingtodcfromseattle · 02-27-2010, 08:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MJ1983

Yeah, we have thought about staying here for a few more years until the economy gets better, but I hate having things up in the air and not feeling "settled." I really just want to finally be where we are going to "be." We have had the intention of moving back for the past couple of years, but recently we have really been thinking about whether or not that is a good idea for our careers/finances. Plus we want to start a family, and that would be impossible if we move, can't find jobs and don't have insurance.

Do you mind me asking why you moved out here? Based on your experiences in Seattle, are there any jobs for counselors and people in the political (liberal) field?

We moved here as a result of my husband's job. It was either relocation or take a severance package in Seattle. We chose to move for fear of my husband not being able to find a job in his field in Seattle. Our children are young so it has been a challenge not having family around, but we now have some good friends to rely on for help when needed. I don't have any info on counselor or political field positions.

car54 · 02-27-2010, 09:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MJ1983

...So, do you choose career or family? I really don't think we will be able to have both...

Well, unless family is going to support you....it seems like a no-brainer.

elias9193 · 02-27-2010, 09:33 PM

I had to make the same choice 20 years ago My wife had to decide to move where the money was or stay close to family. We decided to come to noVA from Florida and looking back now it was the best decision we ever made.
We visited family when we could and we missed them dearly at times but it was well worth the trade off. Good luck which ever way you decide.

athousandlogins · 02-27-2010, 10:02 PM

I think a lot of people are in this position. We also have no family in NoVA at all, and now that we have 2 kids, we definitely feel their absence. But when my husband went job hunting in 2008, he got 2 job offers in the DC area and no job offers anywhere else. So here we are.

We would not give up our financial security to be near our families, as much as we love them. We can't merely survive - we need to thrive. We want to be in a solid financial position in 20 years so that our children aren't consumed with worry about us. (As I am with regard to my own parents, who made many big life decisions based on emotion, and now are totally broke and approaching retirement age.) Not that it is perfect here - the cost of living is such that we may never be able to buy a home here, for instance. But we don't have to live on the edge, either. And we know that even if we are stuck renting forever, we will have access to good public schools and a high quality of life for our kids. (Even if your immediate family is employed, being in an area with high unemployment is depressing for a lot of reasons. I'm from Rhode Island, so I know this firsthand.)

My life definitely lacks something without family nearby, I won't lie. But I can't imagine trading financial security for them, as much as I love them, because at the end of the day we have to support ourselves.

mlv311 · 02-28-2010, 07:22 AM

We were in a similar situation because my husband's family lives in WA. We lived in Seattle for 4 years and came back to NoVA 3 years ago. I think that if you are starting your career now, do it in a place where the job opportunities are. You can always stay closely in touch with family and visit them and vice versa. As you look for a job here, network and keep your contacts in the Pacific Northwest alive so that if you ever want to relocate, you have a network to tap. You'd be surprised how many people work here for a few years and relocate to the Pacific Northwest and vice versa. But if you are under-employed or unhappy with your job situation at the beginning of your careers, you will suffer emotionally, mentally and financially. Once you have children, then you need to weigh the pros and cons of good jobs versus family support. Good luck with your decision.

CaliTerp07 · 02-28-2010, 07:50 AM

My mom keeps trying to guilt trip me to move back to California. For a lot of reasons, I'd love to--my entire family is there, I like the weather better, the culture better...but there's no jobs. I refuse to give up my well-paying job and financial security just to be closer to family. That's irresponsible, in my opinion.

So for now, my husband and I are here, in NoVA. We put out feelers every once in a while to colleagues asking about jobs in other states and cities, and if/when good ones appear, we'll go.