Feeling depress by looking for a house in OC??? (San Francisco: houses, neighborhoods)

[Surfertx]

Originally Posted by VoxTerra

It's pretty much impossible for a mom (or dad) to stay home with their kids if the breadwinner is not making serious bank. I have a friend who moved out of CA and is able to stay home and raise her kids now. She and her husband have never been happier. They also have a gorgeous new home in a spectacular neighborhood for about 1/4 of the cost out here. Sometimes it's all about priorities.

Good for your friend but having a big beautiful home is not everything. Finding the balance between priorities and true happiness is a challenge in itself. I moved to Houston TX from OC and purchased a nice big house on a golf course for 300k and I'm not truly happy. Like mrwumpus posted here there are many offsets to every place you go. I'm still planning to move back to OC but at the same time understanding the reality of how much more cost of living will rise for me.

So OP start small, research and due your do diligence. It takes a few good years to understand a new environment. Be patient and enjoy the freaking awesome weather and all the great things Cali has to offer.

[CaliRestoration]

If you tie your "happiness" to a house and a location, you'll never be truly happy.

[expatCA]

Originally Posted by CaliRestoration

If you tie your "happiness" to a house and a location, you'll never be truly happy.

Just a house no, but a location involves a lot.

[aslowdodge]

Originally Posted by expatCA

Just a house no, but a location involves a lot.

Gotta say yes on this. So many Ca people here are happy living in Ca and extoll it's virtues while sacrafice for a more modest house.

[expatCA]

Originally Posted by aslowdodge

Gotta say yes on this. So many Ca people here are happy living in Ca and extoll it's virtues while sacrafice for a more modest house.

Location is what drives buying and pricing. If fewer people wanted to live in CA prices would go down and if more people wanted to live in say Kansas, their prices would go up.

[Justabystander]

Originally Posted by mrwumpus

I can speak to this as a native OC person who left with his family four years ago to escape the cons of OC.

The grass is not greener elsewhere. It's just different grass with different pros and cons.

OC's pros are unique to OC. Mild coastal weather combined with a diverse assortment of healthy and happy people enjoying the good life (and its pursuit). It's like a giant cruise ship with countless things to do.

Yes, many of its cons are due to its pros, but you do not get the same pros by moving away. You might replace them with new pros, but you still lose what makes OC special (and what makes it bad).

It took me three years and several visits back to OC to finally let go of it, to finally appreciate its pros and cons in full. Our family finally has absorbed new pros in a new place that have altered our tolerance for OC's cons, to where now we enjoy it more as a vacation place than a permanent residence.

That being said, we never would have moved away had we been able to afford a home there and feel settled, rather than being ripped away every few years due to lease endings or rent increases.

Everyone's mileage may very, but I would say if you have deep roots in a place, never underestimate the precious value of your local "tribe" and the unique vibes of a place you call home.

I just returned for a high school class reunion to OC where I had a great time; my family has been gone from the area now for over 20 years. I can look at the landscape of OC knowing that I am one of the few lucky enough to have the option of moving back and affording a nice single family home in probably anywhere but CDM. I still have great friendships there, and see the pros of living there. But the cons of OC just outweigh the pros by quite a bit, and life in a lower cost area that is green and lush, with public transportation and good education, just trumps anything that I am missing IMO. What I saw was gas prices sky high, traffic conjestion that has gotten so much worse, aging neighborhoods and brown and overpopulated towns. That being said, most of the housing just seemed overpriced for what you get, stucco houses that vary in design but still look the same. There are choices that can be made as prior posters have stated. But enjoying a trip as a vacation to OC is far better as far as I can see with distance in the rear view mirror than living there at this point. It would be far worse I think if I were in a position of barely affording a house and having to scrimp just to live in a mediocre neighborhood in debt. I realized that I still love OC, but not to live there.

[expatCA]

Originally Posted by Justabystander

I just returned for a high school class reunion to OC where I had a great time; my family has been gone from the area now for over 20 years. I can look at the landscape of OC knowing that I am one of the few lucky enough to have the option of moving back and affording a nice single family home in probably anywhere but CDM. I still have great friendships there, and see the pros of living there. But the cons of OC just outweigh the pros by quite a bit, and life in a lower cost area that is green and lush, with public transportation and good education, just trumps anything that I am missing IMO. What I saw was gas prices sky high, traffic conjestion that has gotten so much worse, aging neighborhoods and brown and overpopulated towns. That being said, most of the housing just seemed overpriced for what you get, stucco houses that vary in design but still look the same. There are choices that can be made as prior posters have stated. But enjoying a trip as a vacation to OC is far better as far as I can see with distance in the rear view mirror than living there at this point. It would be far worse I think if I were in a position of barely affording a house and having to scrimp just to live in a mediocre neighborhood in debt. I realized that I still love OC, but not to live there.

I feel the same way and grew up in OC when it was a very nice place to live. Now just nice to visit and leave.

[CaliRestoration]

Originally Posted by expatCA

Just a house no, but a location involves a lot.

I guess if you're tied to a location financially, but that's an artificial tie.

I personally hate being in one place for more than a few months which is why I've been buying homes in different places.

[VoxTerra]

Originally Posted by Surfertx

Good for your friend but having a big beautiful home is not everything.

Originally Posted by CaliRestoration

If you tie your "happiness" to a house and a location, you'll never be truly happy.

I should have been more clear: It's the fact that they can now afford live in a great neighborhood, with better schools, ON ONE INCOME so she can stay home with her children. A nicer home for less is just a bonus. Long story short, their children are their priority, and it's better for their children. So, yes, they are indeed truly happy.

[Axxlrod]

It's hard to feel sorry for someone who moves to OC from a low-cost state like TX, as they knew or should have known, what they were getting into. Same scenario as someone who willingly moves next to an airport, and then complains about the noise. You knew what you were getting into!

The people I do feel sorry for are the natives who were raised here, and their families are here, but when due to the run-up on home prices, will maybe never be able to afford to buy a house, except for somewhere in the IE.

I worry about when my kids grow up and start working. By then a starter home will be $1M. How are they going to be able to swing that?