Possible move to Oregon (Portland: living in, stores, bars)

[mak69015]

Actually, Steve, it is a very big deal and it doesnt appear by your response you have a clue about what "we" go through when living in a community that is completely against everything you stand for.

At no point am I looking for "special recognition". What I'm looking for is to live in a community where my childrens teachers dont frown at parent teacher because they their student has same sex parents. Or perhaps in a school system where my children arent bullied for being the minority in school, because that's happened too.

[Steve Pickering]

Originally Posted by mak69015

Actually, Steve, it is a very big deal and it doesnt appear by your response you have a clue about what "we" go through when living in a community that is completely against everything you stand for.

At no point am I looking for "special recognition". What I'm looking for is to live in a community where my childrens teachers dont frown at parent teacher because they their student has same sex parents. Or perhaps in a school system where my children arent bullied for being the minority in school, because that's happened too.

I guess you are telling me you live in the real world where your choices are not as accepted as some would like us to believe.

I must have been wrong when I believed there was a New Norm the less than 30 something’s have been touting.

In the three months I spent living with a lesbian couple to research a term paper in 2006, I never once saw any of the things you mention. That was in Apache Junction.

I don't think it is any different in the PNW

[Kimballette]

Originally Posted by Steve Pickering

I guess you are telling me you live in the real world where your choices are not as accepted as some would like us to believe.

I must have been wrong when I believed there was a New Norm the less than 30 something’s have been touting.

In the three months I spent living with a lesbian couple to research a term paper in 2006, I never once saw any of the things you mention. That was in Apache Junction.

I don't think it is any different in the PNW

Three months with one lesbian couple (and your term paper) nearly seven years ago in Arizona is not relevant to this person's question about Oregon today. She asked specifically about the here and now, not memory lane in the desert southwest.

[Steve Pickering]

Originally Posted by Kimballette

Three months with one lesbian couple (and your term paper) nearly seven years ago in Arizona is not relevant to this person's question about Oregon today. She asked specifically about the here and now, not memory lane in the desert southwest.

OK, do you want me to go into detail as to the current here and now and why I think her comments are just a little stereotypical.

I live with this subject everyday. I have for years. I actually studied it. Not just using preconceived notions. I also lived in the very large Lake Brownwood (Texas) Lesbian community for several years with dozens of couples. I have an apartment attached to my home with a GLBT individual I interact with daily.

Everything I read says, “Nobody Cares Anymore”. The state of Washington just passed a law allowing SSM (same sex marriage), although I see the smart money is on the SCOTUS overturning it. It was announced today that they were going to take it up. The people voted, but the SCOTUS seems to be concerned the Washington law is in violation of some federal law.


I hope they leave it alone. When my sister moved to Arizona with her partner they were there only a few weeks when Arizona denied SSM and her partner committed suicide. That is the old way.



I am surrounded by the GLBT community everyday and I don’t just speak from the past. Can you say the same? The here and now doesn't care about your sexual preference unless you bring it up and flaunt it. Straight or gay.

[Kimballette]

Originally Posted by Steve Pickering

OK, do you want me to go into detail as to the current here and now and why I think her comments are just a little stereotypical.

I am surrounded by the GLBT community everyday and I don’t just speak from the past. Can you say the same? The here and now doesn't care about your sexual preference unless you bring it up and flaunt it. Straight or gay.

1. Yes, details would be more useful to the o/p than generalizations and rambling pontification.
2. Yes, I can say the same.
3. I strongly disagree with your final statement. It's yet another generalization that doesn't address any specifics.

[Steve Pickering]

Originally Posted by Kimballette

1. Yes, details would be more useful to the o/p than generalizations and rambling pontification.
2. Yes, I can say the same.
3. I strongly disagree with your final statement. It's yet another generalization that doesn't address any specifics.

Why do I get the feeling you don't actually live here. You seem to have more of the Arizona attitude toward the GLBT community. It isn't that way in Oregon.

We don't care, and we don't need to hear that you think you are different.

You want to move here do it based on the city or state, not on your sexual choices.

[Kimballette]

Originally Posted by Steve Pickering

Why do I get the feeling you don't actually live here. You seem to have more of the Arizona attitude toward the GLBT community. It isn't that way in Oregon.

We don't care, and we don't need to hear that you think you are different.

You want to move here do it based on the city or state, not on your sexual choices.

Just like you, I've lived in both states. And you can clearly see that I live in Phoenix, so great detective work there.

We just disagree. It's not an "Arizona attitude." I'd just like to see the o/p get more detail and useful feedback (like others have provided) rather than being challenged for asking questions about something that's important to her. She has valid questions and said nothing to indicate she's looking for special treatment, just equal treatment for her and her family.

[Steve Pickering]

I still live (not lived) in both states. You keep missing the point. Don't ask. There is no stigma here. That is the answer.

[Nell Plotts]

I think the Supreme Court decisions next year will put this to rest. Historically if a couple is legally married in one state that status must be recognized by every state. The "Defense of Marriage Law" attempted to overturn that. I think the Supremes will find that law invalid.

The California case I think will affirmed (supporting gay marriage) but the scope of their decision may limit it to California.

Marriage is a legal status often affirmed by religious institutions. By the end of the year I expect that a couple can be married in WA and be regarded as married by the Feds and the state of Oregon.

Socially a gay couple is not a big deal (or any deal) in the Willamette Valley.

[PNW-type-gal]

For the most part, it's not a big deal. To say we (in Oregon and the US in general) have no race/class/religion/orientation biases is just flat-out dreaming.

Many people are pretty lasissez-faire about these issues in Oregon, which has a sort of libertarian MYOB attitude. That doesn't mean that everyone does or that a gay couple might not face some unpleasant moments, even in, say, the heart of Portland. But I suspect the OP knows that and isn't looking for an open utopia, just for a place where it isn't a daily grind hassle. Certainly the larger cities will be better about it than the smaller cities and rural areas.

Before the election, I was in the post office in Eugene, of all places, and heard one man commenting to another that he was hoping "everyone would wake up and vote out that socialist Kenyan n***** ." Certainly we have the lunatic fringe here - it's not the mainstream view, but it exists, especially in less direct and overt ways.

As an added political bit - I don't have a lot of faith in the Supremes, especially as things stand now, and as a supporter of equal marriage rights, I think I'd prefer to have this issue more firmly established in a larger number of states before it hits the court.